Name jokes

[Streetwise]

No joke: One of the parents at a school I was teaching at in Sydney had changed the family surname to "Universe" so her daughters would be called "Miss Universe" - the mind boggles. People sometimes said to me, "How can you put up with teenagers all day?" but it's their parents that really take the cake...

Once, at the start of a year, I had to really work on keeping a poker face when reading through the class roll to take attendance, and realising the next name on the list was "Bambi"... thankfully this 13-year-old girl was a cheerful character, and after several weeks I knew I could ask, while they were engaged in groupwork and it wasn't going to be the focus of the whole class, "I was wondering if there is a story behind your name?"

To which the girl airily replied, "Yes. My mother and father are stupid."

Someone else, at an exclusive private school, had called their son "President" for a first name. Poor kid.

Apparently Christmas is a common surname in S.E England, I think its the English version of Santos or Cruz in Latinate speaking countries,England has some very interesting surnames like Pig(g) ,I wish I had gone and listened to my mothers court appearances some stories were really embarrassing like a young couple getting divorced the wife's testimony"he wouldn't share his pop(soda) with me" my mother could be sarcastic, I can only imagine the myriad jokes overloading her brain when she heard that!

 

[Ronald Zeeman]

A popular liquor with us Ron's when we visit Cuba. Not a popular name in Dutch either, not sure why my mother and her sister both named both my self and my cousin this. Wife gave a second bottle to her dad as a joke.
By tradition I should have been named after my maternal grand father. He was not amused with my name. Took us a while to find a bottle, sold out quickly. Shop owner had big smile.

 

[Captain Jigglypuff]

I just thought of a really clever drag name that I’m surprised hasn’t been used yet considering it’s a pun and drag performers love using names like that. It is Calcutta Ho (or Bitz) and the name is a play on either “I’ll cut a ho/b****” or “Cal cut a ho/b****”