Naming your strengths

[Duna]

Turns out, I am beginning to suspect people have two main kinds of weakness; the weakness we recognize as a vice of deficient goodness or surplus badness, and then the sort of things we value highly but wish we possessed more of, to the point we resent ourselves for having a little when we'd prefer a lot instead.

Good point!

 

[WhitewaterWoman]

How can one name a strength when the world has spent the entirety of one's time on it striping one to the bone and then informing one one's bones are malformed?

Ask me to list a strength and I will tell you truthfully, I have none. Not one redeeming skill or ability.

Dirt helps things grow. I can't do that, thusly dirt has more strength and worth than I do...

I can appreciate the worth of dirt.

While I know it is not true that you have no strengths (I personally know you have writing skills), your message resonates with me. I have to work very hard to keep those thoughts at bay.

Stubborness is my biggest strength. I just don't give up, especially when advocating for others. I will push up the "chain of command" in state services and by now they know this and sometimes all I have to do is ask and I get what I want because they know I won't give up. They also know I will take it to our state legislators and they don't like that.

IRL I know that people like to talk to me and find me a comforting listener and I am glad about that.

 

[Gracey]

my strength can be termed stubbornness.
I'm not sure that's accurate though.

I view it more as determination. Possibly steadfast deliberation?

If I state "I will..."
then I will. Undeterred. Resolute.

 

[Ken]

Ask me to list a strength and I will tell you truthfully, I have none. Not one redeeming skill or ability.

Dirt helps things grow. I can't do that, thusly dirt has more strength and worth than I do...

I can appreciate the worth of dirt.

You're kidding right?

Well, OK I know the feeling, I have certainly been there - a lot, but we all know it isn't true. Yes, dirt helps things grow and I too appreciate the worth of dirt. Indeed, dirt plays a vital role and is extremely valuable. But, dirt's value is in what dirt does. Dirt can't do what you do.

You also are extremely valuable, but in your way, not dirt's way. You have shared tremendous wisdom helping many people here on this forum - and I'm sure far beyond. Indeed I am one benefiting from you wisdom (Thank you for that). Dirt has never done that. I'm sure you have done lots more good things that dirt can't do.

As Fred Rogers says, you are unique. No one can do what you do better than you, because no one is exactly like you. It is always hard to see yourself, but just know that you are uniquely precious.

Now back to the subject of this thread; my strengths are:
Diligence
Perseverance
Focus
Easy to view cause and effect mechanisms in my mind
Good at innovative thinking
Empathy

 

[Metal316]

I get down on myself too. I didn't make a lot of friends over my life.
As soon as friends started criticizing or being whiney I immediately preferred my own company

I could state that if I'm in a position to help someone then I do, it's often been physical work to help and I've done my best even through back pain. I've always had a sense of duty.

It's hard to write that as a strength, I never used to answer at all if asked, say in a job interview etc.

 

[Wolfnox]

Not sure what my strengths are. Well know my weaknesses.

 

[Ronald Zeeman]

You probably share strengths with many of us here, for instance being detail oriented, meticulousness. I Like keeping things ordered, seeing patterns.
IF you have any special interests that will clue you.

 

[Darkkin]

I could write a novel about all the ways I fail to measure up, but...

I know how to use a screw driver and figured out the directions for installing a doorknob.

I also didn't laugh when my best friend got stuck in the basement when the previous knob failed. I popped the hinge pins and got the door open.

I also don't kill houseplants. (I have too many, but none of them are dead or slowly dying. Hint: Do not overwater.)

 

[Wolfnox]

You probably share strengths with many of us here, for instance being detail oriented, meticulousness. I Like keeping things ordered, seeing patterns.
IF you have any special interests that will clue you.

History. Video games and reading. That's about it. I've been cutting out somethings. Adding others. Not sure they help much.
One strength. A dry humor.

 

[Wolfnox]

I could write a novel about all the ways I fail to measure up, but...

I know how to use a screw driver and figured out the directions for installing a doorknob.

I also don't kill houseplants. (I have too many, but none of them are dead or slowly dying. Hint: Do not overwater.)

Assuming the doorknob is the right size to begin with. And no cutting is required. Faced that with a few other things.

 

[Ronald Zeeman]

History and reading cover large swaths of territory. I would like to know more?

 

[Wolfnox]

History and reading cover large swaths of territory. I would like to know more?

Sorry. Military History. Ancient Civilizations. Some weapons. Disasters new and ancient. Lisbon one especially interesting. Astrology.
Newspaper comics. Some geography. Mostly on volcanoes.

 

[Luca]

I don't know if this counts as a strength but I have a lot of personality.

 

[Ronald Zeeman]

Knowledge is always a strength especially specialized knowledge one of the great courses I watched a while ago
is called Masters of War History's Greatest Strategic Thinkers.

 

[Luca]

Strengths, one thing is that I'm physically stubborn. If I set a goal for myself, I can deal with a lot of pain and discomfort. Quick example, I had to do a running test once, running as fast and hard as I could for a set distance, a long distance. I was in a group of people and we were tested, to see who needed what kind of training. So we went through several tests, one was the running test. I was so focused on doing well that I ran until I barfed, almost passed out and tasted blood. I was hanging over a fence like a wet towel, blacking out a little. I really overdid it. But I did ace the test. So I guess being stubborn enough to torture myself like that has always been a strenght. It's a simple strength, it's not rocket science, but it's something.

Being incredibly stubborn is another one of my strengths too. If I have a goal, I'm going to reach that goal, and no one can stop me.

 

[Darkkin]

I don't know if this counts as a strength but I have a lot of personality.

Of course that counts.

I'm smart enough to know that occasionally I can do colossally stupid things when I get truly upset, stupid to the level of wiping my hard drive and online backups of more than 15 years of writing projects, upwards of 4 million words, (eight completed manuscripts and 300+ poems).

Scorched earth. Nothing left.

But I also know myself well enough to know I would regret doing that so I have friends who keep online backups (updated with every save) that I could not access.

I'm smart enough to build in a failsafe because when I do get that upset, the only thing I am ever going to harm is something only I created, something no one else is going to miss, thusly, no one would notice how truly upset I was.

The only thing I have that fits those parameters, my writing. Only I know its full extent, and no one would notice if it disappeared.

 

[Luca]

Of course that counts.

I'm smart enough to know that occasionally I can do colossally stupid things when I get truly upset, stupid to the level of wiping my hard drive and online backups of more than 15 years of writing projects, upwards of 4 million words, (eight completed manuscripts and 300+ poems).

Scorched earth. Nothing left.

But I also know myself well enough to know I would regret doing that so I have friends who keep online backups (updated with every save) that I could not access.

I'm smart enough to build in a failsafe because when I do get that upset, the only thing I am ever going to harm is something only I created, something no one else is going to miss, thusly, no one would notice how truly upset I was.

The only thing I have that fits those parameters, my writing. Only I know its full extent, and no one would notice if it disappeared.

Being intelligent is a strength too. You are *undoubtedly* highly intelligent!

I have always had very little faith in my own intelligence despite the facts.
I did exceptionally well in school (in advanced placement classes, except for math, math is NOT one of my strengths), and I could read and write at essentially a college level when I was in elementary school. I also graduated from high school early, and got into every college I applied to (including Amherst College and Salve Regina), for what it's worth.
I ended up going to a decent school, and did well academically, but I got bullied so badly that I left.

Even with that said, I still feel like most people think I'm dumb, and I still feel like I am sometimes... I don't think my social and emotional intelligence measure up to my academic abilities. I still treat myself like I'm not very smart and that's how I talk about myself too. I'm convinced that despite how well I do in school, I still have a relatively low IQ.

Depressing, I know...

 

[Ken]

Being intelligent is a strength too. You are *undoubtedly* highly intelligent!

I have always had very little faith in my own intelligence despite the facts.
I did exceptionally well in school (in advanced placement classes, except for math, math is NOT one of my strengths), and I could read and write at essentially a college level when I was in elementary school. I also graduated from high school early, and got into every college I applied to (including Amherst College and Salve Regina), for what it's worth.
I ended up going to a decent school, and did well academically, but I got bullied so badly that I left.

Even with that said, I still feel like most people think I'm dumb, and I still feel like I am sometimes... I don't think my social and emotional intelligence measure up to my academic abilities. I still treat myself like I'm not very smart and that's how I talk about myself too. I'm convinced that despite how well I do in school, I still have a relatively low IQ.

Depressing, I know...

But, that's what autism is all about: perception. Autistic's perceive the world differently, thus neurodivergent. Being different from the typical, makes us feel "wrong".

You have to keep in mind that you are not wrong. Just different. Took me 67 years to figure that one out! Different is not wrong or bad; it's innovation.

 

[AutistAcolyte]

brought this up with my psychologist and she helped me work out a list of strengths for me. It was helpful to have her there to remind me that not everyone thinks the way i do, and that some things that i tend to think are just normal operating for me are normal for everyone. for example patience and politeness come fairly natural to me, so i think they arent strengths and that everyone is patient and polite. this is of course not the case, but that's how my brain rationalizes away my strengths.

 

[AutistAcolyte]

here is the list:
-dedication to things i see as important
-willingness to make myself available and to help
-preaching
-calming presence/relaxed
-adaptability
-humble
-open to learning/teachable
-good at detail-oriented/solitary work
-patient
-considerate
-polite
-generally approachable
-curious
-studious
-thoughtful/deep thinker
-willing to "go along for the ride"
-forgiving
-loyal