On the subject of meltdowns.

[Neia]

As a kid I'd have what others called tantrums.
I remember once, when I was 5, I was left home alone because the adults needed to go buy cigarettes. I was absolutely terrified after the first few minutes. We had just moved to another country... I didn't really know anything about the place.

When they got back home I was called silly for crying. After all (insert mocking tone here) I was no longer a baby and knew they had gone to buy cigarettes, there was no reason to cry. How silly of me.

This and other similar episodes taught me not to reveal my feelings to anyone. I didn't like being ridiculed.
I'd still have tantrums, but would hide them if I could, and they became more rare as I grew up.

Now however, I have them quite often. Fortunately I live alone, so my tantrums aren't witnessed very often. Every time I am overwhelmed by stress, my anxiety shoots up and I end up sat on my bed crying.

When this happens I lose all strength in my body. I start trembling and have to lay down because I won't even have the strength to stay sitting. And then, when that ends, I'll feel so tired.

Are these what's called meltdowns?

 

[Neia]

Also... I have similar reactions when my comfort levels reach bottom level.

If there's someone playing the kind of music that drives me nuts, and that happens for a long time, it'll come to a point where I'll just lose it and will act about the same way, with the exception of also feeling like there's a sort of painful itch inside my brain.

Or if the weather is too hot, or the wind too loud...

 

[Rodafina]

A few threads regarding meltdowns that may interest you:

https://www.autismforums.com/threads/angry-outburst-vs-meltdown-advice-on-cause-of-it.48039/

https://www.autismforums.com/threads/meltdown-or-shutdown-or-burnout.43859/

https://www.autismforums.com/threads/the-anatomy-of-a-meltdown.45760/

https://www.autismforums.com/threads/full-explosion-meltdown-kinda-thing.43888/

https://www.autismforums.com/threads/meltdown-aftermath-care.38467/

https://www.autismforums.com/threads/meltdown-again.41002/

 

[Misty Avich]

As a kid I'd have what others called tantrums.
I remember once, when I was 5, I was left home alone because the adults needed to go buy cigarettes. I was absolutely terrified after the first few minutes. We had just moved to another country... I didn't really know anything about the place.

When they got back home I was called silly for crying. After all (insert mocking tone here) I was no longer a baby and knew they had gone to buy cigarettes, there was no reason to cry. How silly of me.

I take it you grew up before the 1990s, because when I was a kid it was illegal to leave a child that young home alone even if it was just going to the store, and it's very normal for a child of 5 to cry.
I remember when I was 3 or 4 my dad had got a new car, and wanted to just reverse it just past our next door neighbour's house. My mum was standing just outside the front gate of our house, but there was a bush there so I couldn't see her. I was in the house with my brother and my sister, who were also little (but a bit older than me), and as soon as I saw the car move I began crying because I thought our parents had abandoned us. They hadn't, and my brother put his arm around me and told me that they were literally just outside the house.

 

[Outdated]

Also... I have similar reactions when my comfort levels reach bottom level.

If there's someone playing the kind of music that drives me nuts, and that happens for a long time, it'll come to a point where I'll just lose it and will act about the same way, with the exception of also feeling like there's a sort of painful itch inside my brain.

Or if the weather is too hot, or the wind too loud...

I have the sensations you describe but I don't suffer meltdowns as other people describe them. I've mostly been proud of my self control though, sometimes I wish I could act out like others but it never happens.

 

[Neia]

I take it you grew up before the 1990s, because when I was a kid it was illegal to leave a child that young home alone even if it was just going to the store, and it's very normal for a child of 5 to cry.
I remember when I was 3 or 4 my dad had got a new car, and wanted to just reverse it just past our next door neighbour's house. My mum was standing just outside the front gate of our house, but there was a bush there so I couldn't see her. I was in the house with my brother and my sister, who were also little (but a bit older than me), and as soon as I saw the car move I began crying because I thought our parents had abandoned us. They hadn't, and my brother put his arm around me and told me that they were literally just outside the house.

I'm 53

 

[Neia]

I have the sensations you describe but I don't suffer meltdowns as other people describe them. I've mostly been proud of my self control though, sometimes I wish I could act out like others but it never happens.

I had self control for a while, but the past few years I've been losing it quite regularly.

 

[Outdated]

I've found I'm getting a lot more sensitive as I'm getting older. I also spent a decade living in a remote tropical rainforest region and adjusting to the noise of a city again took me a while.

I think that's a part of my sleep issues, I like being up between midnight and 6 am because it's so peaceful.

 

[Neia]

I've found I'm getting a lot more sensitive as I'm getting older. I also spent a decade living in a remote tropical rainforest region and adjusting to the noise of a city again took me a while.

I think that's a part of my sleep issues, I like being up between midnight and 6 am because it's so peaceful.

There's nothing like those hours when everyone else is asleep and the world is quiet. Unless you live in my town, where the winds blow loudly for most of the summer, and during winter storms.

Why do I have to live in a seaside country?

 

[Outdated]

Where I live now isn't so bad. It's not a big city and not as busy as many. We do get some nasty storms sometimes but usually here it's sunny with gentle breezes. It was completely still this morning, and cold too, it got down to 3 degrees.

I live about 3 Km from the beach, in the middle of this mess:

Google Maps

Find local businesses, view maps and get driving directions in Google Maps.

www.google.com.au

 

[Neia]

Where I live now isn't so bad. It's not a big city and not as busy as many. We do get some nasty storms sometimes but usually here it's sunny with gentle breezes. It was completely still this morning, and cold too, it got down to 3 degrees.

I live about 3 Km from the beach, in the middle of this mess:

Google Maps

Find local businesses, view maps and get driving directions in Google Maps.

www.google.com.au

The whole of Portugal seems like it could fit in the area of Adelaide and surroundings
I live near Lisbon, about 1Km from the ocean.
Wind is a near constant here. It becomes unbearable at times

 

[Misty Avich]

I love hearing nature, including the weather. Much better than hearing people, banging above your head and the drone of their babies bawling all day long.

 

[Outdated]

I'm just looking forward to getting past winter. I found the heat up north harder to take as I got older but I'm not real fond of the cold either.

 

[jsilver256]

Something related/interesting as an aside, didn't want to make a new thread on it.

My therapist told me today that stimming and meltdowns are connected. Both have to do with emotional regulation.

A lot of autistics have issues with aggression, not always physical aggression, but.verbal aggression - cussing, lashing out, etc. That is part of emotional regulation and the therapy is usually to redirect that.

I have zero "verbal processing" as he put it. So he thinks the emotional regulation that is expressed in most autistics verbally is being compensated with the body doubling down on stimming, which I have a particularly bad case of. And shutdowns/tears of course.

There's been a pretty regular patterns to my days. I wake up in a great mood and ready to tackle the world with autistic talents, and end up going out somewhere and getting overloaded.

 

[Suzanne]

From what I gather, meltdowns come in a few different forms.

I tend to have calmed down with meltdowns, but a few incidences a little while ago, caused a meltdown and surprising with one, my husband showed amazing love to me. Holding me and smoothing me, which helped to desolve that anguish feeling. This was because I was tired and trying to sleep, but across from us, a band suddenly appeared and the music was a constant: thump, thump and so forth. Now, I like music and at a high volume, but this was too much and then, came the loudest fireworks. I tried my husband's big earphones, but did not block it out; in fact, made it worse.

In fairness, any on looker would suppose it is a tantrum. I mean: when children do this, they are berated, so how much more so, an adult behaving in a strange way?

But, yes, I tend to react how you describe.

 

[Outdated]

...verbal aggression - cussing, lashing out, etc. That is part of emotional regulation and the therapy is usually to redirect that.

Interesting. This sounds like I'm trying to be funny but in a way I'm also serious. As an Aussie I swear a lot, we all do, in fact when the swearing stops it means you're in trouble.

Half the words I can't use in this forum often show on the front page of newspapers here and we had a government sponsored tourism campaign for the Northern Territory a few years back that I can't reference here. Maybe that's why we do it.

 

[Misty Avich]

Something related/interesting as an aside, didn't want to make a new thread on it.

My therapist told me today that stimming and meltdowns are connected. Both have to do with emotional regulation.

I've never stimmed during a meltdown. (Not correcting you or anything, just saying from my experience).

A lot of autistics have issues with aggression, not always physical aggression, but.verbal aggression - cussing, lashing out, etc. That is part of emotional regulation and the therapy is usually to redirect that.

That's what mine used to be like before I went on Sertraline. I've learnt from this site that it's wrong to have these sorts of meltdowns but I couldn't help it. It's just how I reacted to certain triggers such as depression and anger.

I have zero "verbal processing" as he put it. So he thinks the emotional regulation that is expressed in most autistics verbally is being compensated with the body doubling down on stimming, which I have a particularly bad case of. And shutdowns/tears of course.

I didn't lose my verbal processing during a meltdown. I argued at my loved ones, getting more and more frustrated if I didn't win the argument. Saying things like "sshh, I'm watching the TV" just made me all the more angry. As if I'm going to say "oh, sorry, I'll carry on ths meltdown in whispers". Lol.
It was like an adrenaline rush I had that gave me all this nervous energy to fly up in a rage, shouting, swearing, arguing, slamming doors and crying. Nobody got hurt though, as I wasn't violent.

There's been a pretty regular patterns to my days. I wake up in a great mood and ready to tackle the world with autistic talents, and end up going out somewhere and getting overloaded.

What triggered my meltdowns was reminders of how unhappy I was in my own skin. Depression was a huge factor. Anxiety not so much. With anxiety I'd just cry and crave reassurance and understanding. With depression I'd get angry and argumentative. I hate depression.

 

[jsilver256]

Interesting. This sounds like I'm trying to be funny but in a way I'm also serious. As an Aussie I swear a lot, we all do, in fact when the swearing stops it means you're in trouble.

Half the words I can't use in this forum often show on the front page of newspapers here and we had a government sponsored tourism campaign for the Northern Territory a few years back that I can't reference here. Maybe that's why we do it.

My Aussie business partner has definitely expanded my vocabulary... no wonder you guys seem so chill. Maybe there is something to it.

 

[Outdated]

My Aussie business partner has definitely expanded my vocabulary... no wonder you guys seem so chill. Maybe there is something to it.

The advertising campaign I referred to ran for about 5 years and is by far the most successful tourism advertising campaign ever run in this country. There were a few people that got a bit uptight about it but the ads went viral and even just the sales of merchandise broke all records. It was especially popular with European tourists.

 

[thejuice]

Something related/interesting as an aside, didn't want to make a new thread on it.

My therapist told me today that stimming and meltdowns are connected. Both have to do with emotional regulation.

A lot of autistics have issues with aggression, not always physical aggression, but.verbal aggression - cussing, lashing out, etc. That is part of emotional regulation and the therapy is usually to redirect that.

I have zero "verbal processing" as he put it. So he thinks the emotional regulation that is expressed in most autistics verbally is being compensated with the body doubling down on stimming, which I have a particularly bad case of. And shutdowns/tears of course.

There's been a pretty regular patterns to my days. I wake up in a great mood and ready to tackle the world with autistic talents, and end up going out somewhere and getting overloaded.

Verbal processing= emotional processing with words?