Welcome to Autism Forums, a friendly forum to discuss Aspergers Syndrome, Autism, High Functioning Autism and related conditions.
Your voice is missing! You will need to register to get access to the following site features:We hope to see you as a part of our community soon! Please also check us out @ https://www.twitter.com/aspiescentral
I never tell anyone anything deep or rarely how I really feel, this prevents overbearing people from getting any information they need to try and control me.
Basically, I keep them out of my life. Also, I never tell anyone anything deep or rarely how I really feel, this prevents overbearing people from getting any information they need to try and control me.
I'll answer questions like that to an extent online, but usually in real life I say "I'm good" or something along those lines. No matter how I truly feel. No need to give anyone any extra ammunition. If you are standoffish about it when people ask, that also gives them some extra ammo. IMHOEveryone thinks I am joking when I say that the question "how are you" is too personal.
I moved half way across the earth to get away from people like that. There's still my wife, but I can handle 1 overbearing person, just not 100.l have a complete itinerary of people who tell me about my weight, my job, my clothes, my money, who to date, who to dump. l am thinking where did l land? When did a huge amount of strangers decided that l needed something?
I wanted to ask how long it's been - but it doesn't matter. Everyone has their own ways and time frame of dealing with things and no one, other than ourselves, understands what's going on in our heads. It's hard to know what to say to people who are dealing with this kind of issue and it's also hard to know what to say to people to get them off your back. I was proud of myself the other night because I'm one who finds it hard to stand up for myself. My sister had called and started talking about my brother, whom I'm trying to cut out of my life. I just politely said, "I don't want to talk about him" and it stopped.
I don't know how long you were in the relationship or just how bad it was, but you have a lot to process. Finding yourself again. Getting over the hurt. Learning to trust. Just learning how to go about your day to day life. And all those things are personal issues. So you can do the 'evasive maneuvers' like @Tom suggested , you can nod your head and go on your merry way, like @Bolletje mentioned or get snippy. You can do like @Sarah S mentioned and say you're fine. You can make a badge to wear saying you are not accepting unwanted advice. Whatever way you choose to handle it, we support you. None of us want or appreciate people trying to tell us what they think we need to do. I realize they have your best interest in mind and I'm sure you know that, too, or it wouldn't have been a question about what to do. Easiest thing is to say okay and then do your own thing.
But I do hope you are able to move on in your life, an abusive spouse is not worth taking away your future, too.
I resent random strangers coming up and telling me what to do. This is passive-aggressive behaviour and I get angry and don't handle it well - I can get very snappy with them. I try to ignore them and carry on doing my own thing, or if they are being intrusive or insist, I tell them to mind their own business.
Then I might just tell them to F*&% &##!!!!!How about if they say :
Smile. It may never happen.