Overcoming/ Managing Social Anxiety

[Fino]

Thank you! I haven't ever taken anything for social anxiety, apart from DLPA, and wasn't sure if a medication existed that targets social anxiety. As you know, I practice Traditional Chinese Medicine, and I take other plant based remedies, however, nothing for social anxiety. I tried taking a Chinese remedy for generalized anxiety at one time, but, I experienced negative side effects, which made sense, as it is also used for depression, and any medication for depression has negative effects on me. I have never been diagnosed with depression, although, I think I have low moods from time to time, and DLPA relieved that, as well. In my case, generalized anxiety and social anxiety are two different entities.

In regard to your inquiry about cycling the supplement, I thought of that, however, I have not been able to find any information about it. I have only found articles mentioning that it can stop being effective. Would you happen to know how long I should wait, to give it another try, and, if there is anything comparable to DLPA, that I could perhaps use to alternate? I'm not sure how good it would be for my mind, if I were to take it intermittently, due to the alterations it causes, but, if I was able to alternate it with something that produced similar effects, that would be great. Thank you, Alex!

I'll likely go further into the DLPA subject through PM, but I finally got my computer back so here's a few things.

I hope none of this is pointing out the obvious but have you seen the connection between DLPA and Adderall? And DLPA and ADHD? I'm sorry if you've said before, but do you have ADHD?

DLPA is a precursor to Tyrosine, which includes dopamine, norepinephrine, and epinephrine.

Adderall primarily affects dopamine, norepinephrine, and epinephrine.

There are many medications which help with social anxiety. Adderall has helped my social anxiety tremendously. Gabapentin also helped. Buspar helped only general anxiety, and I agree with your separation between general anxiety and social anxiety. Lithium also helped with general anxiety but not social. Adderall made general anxiety worse but helped social.

Have you tried supplementing with L-Tyrosine? It targets the same things.

And I can't find anything about DLPA losing effectiveness over time. If you have anything you could link me to, that would be awesome, but it also seems illogical to me that it would be the case. Is it possible some believe this because they had changes in their life or diet which caused it to lose effectiveness, such as taking it with meals that contain too much protein?

It's a common belief online that Adderall loses its effectiveness over time as well. It's possible these beliefs arise because the initial effects and the excitement and gratitude caused by them lead to expectations too high for its actual effects to meet, and when the body adjusts, the actual effects are seen as no effects. It's all over the internet that tolerance is built against Adderall and many remedies are offered, but go to any doctor and they'll laugh at it all.

If you'd like to simply try DLPA again, seeing as you have the positive association with it, I hope it's not condescending to suggest you make sure you're taking it in a way that maximizes its efficacy.

That's all for now! I just wanted to be thorough, so I apologize if I came off as condescending in any way, that's not what I intended.

 

[Loren]

I over-complicated two simple points:

1. Understanding our own anxiety.
2. Learning to be happy without expecting the understanding of the general population.

I hope that makes more sense!

Thank you for clarifying. It does make sense!

 

[Loren]

I'll likely go further into the DLPA subject through PM, but I finally got my computer back so here's a few things.

I hope none of this is pointing out the obvious but have you seen the connection between DLPA and Adderall? And DLPA and ADHD? I'm sorry if you've said before, but do you have ADHD?

DLPA is a precursor to Tyrosine, which includes dopamine, norepinephrine, and epinephrine.

Adderall primarily affects dopamine, norepinephrine, and epinephrine.

There are many medications which help with social anxiety. Adderall has helped my social anxiety tremendously. Gabapentin also helped. Buspar helped only general anxiety, and I agree with your separation between general anxiety and social anxiety. Lithium also helped with general anxiety but not social. Adderall made general anxiety worse but helped social.

Have you tried supplementing with L-Tyrosine? It targets the same things.

And I can't find anything about DLPA losing effectiveness over time. If you have anything you could link me to, that would be awesome, but it also seems illogical to me that it would be the case. Is it possible some believe this because they had changes in their life or diet which caused it to lose effectiveness, such as taking it with meals that contain too much protein?

It's a common belief online that Adderall loses its effectiveness over time as well. It's possible these beliefs arise because the initial effects and the excitement and gratitude caused by them lead to expectations too high for its actual effects to meet, and when the body adjusts, the actual effects are seen as no effects. It's all over the internet that tolerance is built against Adderall and many remedies are offered, but go to any doctor and they'll laugh at it all.

If you'd like to simply try DLPA again, seeing as you have the positive association with it, I hope it's not condescending to suggest you make sure you're taking it in a way that maximizes its efficacy.

That's all for now! I just wanted to be thorough, so I apologize if I came off as condescending in any way, that's not what I intended.

Thank you very much, for all of the information you've provided! I have been told that I do not have ADHD/ADD. L-Tyrosine has had the opposite effect on me. I had given it a try in the past for mental acuity and similar. I have since utilized it on occasion, when unable to fall asleep. Thanks for mentioning the medications you've taken. I am going to research them in the coming days. I will attempt to retrieve the article(s) I had reviewed, that mention that DLPA can seize to be effective, as per your request, and will pass them on, to you. Thank you, again for everything!

 

[Gracey]

I do know, and accept that a cure could, very well, be impossible, and ridiculous to consider, !

Not at all ridiculous Loren.

Who wouldn't want that ?
I'd prefer to feel relaxed socially than my current shakey, tongue - tied, sweaty mess.

I also know that as determined as I might be,
I will still have to avoid some social gatherings at the moment and chip away and work on things I consider priority,
Like my job.

I think I'm saying,
I'm unable to switch anxiety off all at once in all areas.
I'm starting with small steps and will build it up from there.
I feel optimistic
I will find ways to tolerate or manage,
Rather than cure.


It isn't at all ridiculous to want social anxiety to stop

 

[Fridgemagnetman]

I am the same, although, of late I have noticed that if I isolate myself for extended periods, I begin to feel somewhat, lonely, or blue, and I think in the long run, extensive solitude could, perhaps, have a significant impact on my mental well-being. Thank you for your input!

Regarding the reply which you deleted -a living example of the struggle

I find being specific helps with anxiety.
Being aware of the thoughts,not adding to them - and practice when you're calm.

Have a means to track progress helps.
Otherwise you can go round and round with the same thoughts.

Is it a battle of will?
That can be re-framed differently.
It's more to do with acceptance.
Sometimes if you concentrate on something it can appear worse at the start.

But if you track your progress (I use named filters in a diary app - ie positive,gratitude,progress, works well)

As you said it is to do with thought.
You can think anything you want at any time !
Find out what works and you can be aware of the process starting up and change the outcome.

It takes work. Reading good ideas here, may help,but it is passive.
Creating a process, a structure and being active about it will help more.


Also writing things down to be referred back to actually feeds back to the brain and creates a positive space.
ie if your diary has a space for a list of 'what works' /positive / it will look at other times to 'find' those things.
It's a habit that offsets things like anxiety that can win hands down when you're low if you don't have a habit that offsets this.

It can be an act of faith - as you won't know it works until after you've done it for a while.

I will stop there as you deleted your reply and I can't remember the content to be more specific about it.

Perhaps that,in itself, is an example to learn from.

Best of luck,though.

 

[Loren]

Not at all ridiculous Loren.

Who wouldn't want that ?
I'd prefer to feel relaxed socially than my current shakey, tongue - tied, sweaty mess.

I also know that as determined as I might be,
I will still have to avoid some social gatherings at the moment and chip away and work on things I consider priority,
Like my job.

I think I'm saying,
I'm unable to switch anxiety off all at once in all areas.
I'm starting with small steps and will build it up from there.
I feel optimistic
I will find ways to tolerate or manage,
Rather than cure.


It isn't at all ridiculous to want social anxiety to stop

Thank you for your validation! I utilize some of the same strategies! All that you have shared is invaluable to me! Thank you, Gracey!

 

[Garry jackson]

Acceptance. That you cannot do as much as neurotypicals in this regard, so be yourself. If you feel the need to leave early then do so.

Also lactobacillus reuteri. Reaches parts other putiatary glands cannot hope to. Love hormone generation.

 

[BlueSky Aozora]

If I feel I can't do something or overwhelmed because of anxiety, I try to find a way to make it 'feel ok' to do. For example. I don't want to visit a relative on my own, but if my partner is with me, or another family member, it feels ok or somehow 'acceptable' and I will do it. Or, I don't want to phone someone, but writing a text message will be ok.

Finding the alternative.. This is such a good way.

Now thinking about it, my aspie husband did the similar.. For example, he refused to accompany me together to a shop, but he'll drive me there..

By the way, finding alternatives work because you yourself decide what the alternatives would be. Do you have any advice on how the spouse can encourage the aspie to do something? It means i just need to give him the alternative? Will he, or you (since i'm asking your opinion) likely accept the alternatives thought by your spouse? Or would you find your own alternatives of your spouse's alternatives?

 

[Progster]

By the way, finding alternatives work because you yourself decide what the alternatives would be.

Yes, because it gives you control of a situation, and anxiety is easier to manage when you are in control.

It means i just need to give him the alternative? Will he, or you (since i'm asking your opinion) likely accept the alternatives thought by your spouse? Or would you find your own alternatives of your spouse's alternatives?

You could suggest alternatives, but also crucially show understanding when he says he doesn't want to do something, even if it doesn't seem logical to you. Suggest one or two alternatives in advance, then give him some time to think about it. For important, obligatory things, let him know that the thing needs to be done, suggest alternatives, give him time to think about it, and then ask him. For non-essential social stuff, suggest alternatives, but let him know that it's optional and he doesn't have to do it if he doesn't want to. Agreeing to leave early might be a viable alternative, for example, he might not feel trapped because he can't leave and agree to go along. The things I wrote here apply to me, but won't necessary apply to every person; you know your spouse better than anyone else here so you probably have a good idea already what his limits are and what might work for him.

 

[Pinkie B]

I think a possible help is to go with someone, but I dont know many people well enough. If any. Plus in my experience the person never stays with me the whole time. Then I go and sit somewhere quiet. Or leave.

I've found over the years that copying someone I like and respect works well. I just think, "What would Ikeda-san do?" and try to do that. The best is if I can have that person right there with me to copy in real time.

 

[Fino]

I've found over the years that copying someone I like and respect works well. I just think, "What would Ikeda-san do?" and try to do that. The best is if I can have that person right there with me to copy in real time.

Exactly me!!

 

[Fade2black]

Despite having fairly strong social anxiety, I tried to fit in for years without success. Even though I wanted to be friends with others, I can't recall anyone ever asking me for my phone number to keep in touch. Now that I'm middle age, the anxiety is still there and I manage it by not putting myself in social situations. I basically just gave up, and I seem to be fine with it.

 

[anacrusis]

Over the years, I've watched to see how others do it, and tried to learn some of the tricks, but it's still the most difficult thing to do. Can't do multiple-person at one time interaction - it's too busy and so hard to keep track of several ideas running across a conversation at once. If I can, I'll join only a small group, and keep to the people I know already: I try to remember to ask others their opinion, or ask others about themselves at least as much as I'm telling them about my ideas, or about myself, and also try hard to show that I'm interested in what they're saying. When I'm overwhelmed, I'll take myself off to somewhere quiet - the loo if there's nothing else - and stay there for a bit. The worst situations now I've learned to avoid altogether - my biggest nightmare is the staff christmas night out, seated at long tables with loud chatter all around me, waiting an age for food, unable to filter out the background noise in order to hear what the person sitting next to me is saying. For a few years, one of the senior staff also would insist that we all change places before dessert so that we could socialise with someone else - usually just when I'd got used to talking to my original neighbour... arrrrgh. These days I've simply decided that I've done enough of all that, and tell my colleagues that whilst I appreciate them and don't dislike them all, the setting of the Big Night Out is unbearable, and have stopped going altogether (I'd always gone when the loud music and dancing started anyway). I can't see how my presence at these occasions would add anything - better to be quiet at home than miserable in a huge group of people who're all enjoying themselves...

The big events are always the worst, but social anxiety presents in the smaller things too - how to react when someone's being in some way unpleasant on the bus or on a train, crowding my space or smelling of strong perfume: or even just things like trying to catch the eye of a waiter when eating out, or working out how people do things like catching a bus in a foreign country, or joining in a new activity or interest. I'm always stumbly and fumbly then, and find I'm apologising a lot, but when I watch what others do, they seem to be confident even when they haven't a clue - I do wish I knew how to do that.

 

[Pinkie B]

Exactly me!!

REALLY??????

That's why I love hanging out here! Never in my life have I had so many people I could relate to!