Persecution complex

[autism-and-autotune]

What would it take to feel liked and accepted? What kind of behavior from others would allow you to believe that?

This is a really good question. I don't know about other people, but in my personal relationship, things have become much better since my autism diagnosis because all my behaviour--past and present--is now given an actual reason and not 'Oh, he's just like that.' When I can say "I'm sorry but it's a rough autism day" and have that explain my facial expressions or sensory aversions or lack of attention span and it won't be taken personally by my fiancee...

 

[Jordy]

Some people are disliked in general. I am an unwanted person in general. I can tell with my interactions with people that they look down on me or are repulsed by my.

 

[Shamar]

It’s been brought up to me from time to time that I might have a persecution complex. However, my thought processes constantly point towards the perception that I am disliked in general and others are out to either belittle or harm me.

Sometimes I have been angrily pointed out for having confirmation bias but I can’t shake the feeling someone dislikes me if they disagree with me strongly.

I'm no expert, and I don't know what DSM-IV says (I consider DSM-V to be useless), but it looks to me like this description is pretty much the definition of persecution complex.

 

[Markness]

I worry that I’ve lost face on this forum.

 

[Markness]

I wish I wasn’t a pariah.

 

[tree]

@Markness

How Can I Overcome Negative Self-Talk?​

If you find yourself spiraling as a result of negative self-talk,...here are five things you can do:

1. Notice: be aware that your guest (the inner critic) has shown up. Something as simple as acknowledging this could be the key to stopping a negative self-talk spiral in its tracks.
2. Observe: leave your mind and observe your thoughts, feelings and physical reactions from this voice. You are not your thoughts. You can take a step back and observe, noticing the effect they are having on you. Pay attention to your heart-beat, warmth, breath, tensing of the muscles. In noticing these changes, you can start to lessen the effects.
3. Accept: accept the situation with self-compassion. Remind yourself, “I’m not perfect, I’m a human being and I have my own vulnerability. I try my best. Sometimes it doesn’t turn out how I wanted it to, but this is what it means to be human. I am not alone with this.” When we put too much energy into avoiding or rejecting a thought, the opposite can happen, so allow it to occur and accept it if you cannot change it.
4. Replace: make it a point to imagine yourself saying this to a treasured friend. If you know you wouldn’t say it this way, think of how you’d share your thoughts with a good friend or what you’d like a good friend to say to you. This is a great way to replace the negative self-talk with a positive, accepting or compassionate voice.
5. Question: be curious to explore why you had a particular reaction and open up your own dialogue with the voice, and turn it on its head.
6. Do. Move. Act: being active is crucial to breaking the cycle of negative self-talk. Moving your body, playing music, dancing, singing or taking action towards a new goal can shift you and your energy in the right direction.

Spoiler

https://getpocket.com/explore/item/...r-toxic-inner-critic?utm_source=pocket-newtab

 

[The Pandector]

I’m glad I read all the posts in response. My own understanding is obviously out of sync.

In my experience, my body language, facial expressions, tone of voice, etc. leave most people flat. Add to that an unusual approach to issues and zero interest in sports, etc. and there really is no question in my mind that I am not afforded the personal dignity offered to others as a matter of course.

In the service (70’s), I came across many people who hated me before I opened my mouth. In the workplace, I had to try far harder than others to be heard. Many people unfocus their eyes and look away.

As it happens, I’ve received professional kudos for my ability to observe carefully. So, if someone were to tell me that my imagination is running away with me, I would quickly dismiss it as uninformed or intentional gaslighting. I know what I see.

However… in the old days (diagnosed at 68) I was constantly angered by the endless slights and insults; I’d show them who’s consequential. Now, I realize that NT’s don’t even know what they’re doing most of the time. They are just wired in a way that leaves them overly dependent on social rather than reasonable or rational processing. Usually, they react out of social instinct and only later consider, if at all. In general, they have a poorly developed sense of morality.

That’s okay; they were born that way. I’m the odd man out, so morality aside, it’s up to me to navigate this foreign landscape. Just don’t tell me it’s my imagination.