Romantic Relationships: Take Whoever's Available or Extremely Picky?

[Neonatal RRT]

Is an alpha male a take charge person in times of need. Accepting the consequences and saying to heck with them until the task is done?

Admittedly, this whole concept of an "alpha" and a "beta" male is subject to controversy. It is a convenient and popular analogy, but may be based upon some outdated theories. On some level, just as I have described in my previous posts, there is "something" to this theory within human and primate social structure, but it can get a bit nebulous. So, to accurately answer this question, it requires specific context with regards to the specific individuals and their relationships to each other, and not some general answer.

I know you like wolves. You might be interested in this:

Wolf packs don’t actually have alpha males and alpha females, the idea is based on a misunderstanding

https://wolf.org/headlines/caption-...es-traveling-through-snow-as-a-pack-is-false/

 

[Gerald Wilgus]

this whole concept of an "alpha" and a "beta" male is subject to controversy.

Well, I have thought that guys, usually manipulative NTs, who act like they have a pipeline to the truth, believe that they are alpha. I've experienced managers like that and it pleases me to wholly ignore their direction and proceed with my work to provide deliverables required for projects in the manner of my choosing. The quality and utility of my work had always been excellent such that the people who really counted in operations or regulatory compliance gave me tremendous leeway. Those alphas may have had better social relationships than I, but I saw to it that they never gained influence from my work. However, one manager that I supported, a black woman, treated me as being valuable, so it was easy to provide her with the quality of work that reflected well on her department. I had no qualms about supporting a real alpha like her. [edit] She made my day once when she saw me at the printer and told me that she is very proud to have hired me.

 

[Gerald Wilgus]

when the few willing prospects have to survive your intense visual inspection and then near-obsessive interest in them.

I have been admonished by my spouse to "embrace imperfection" and it has taken some effort to do so. But, it has helped me find a little balance in my view of myself and others.

 

[Suzette]

For me too perfect is bland and uninteresting. Off topic but not off topic, George Clooney for example. When he first was on that hospital show (whatever it was) I couldn't see why anyone thought he was attractive. But once he aged some his features became less regular and his appeal went up for me. But he reminds me of my dad, so no crush tnere!
To me, real beauty is a liitle wabi sabi.

 

[QuestJan]

Is an alpha male a take charge person in times of need. Accepting the consequences and saying to heck with them until the task is done?

Jesus gave good "alpha" examples that have been coined 'the servant leader'. I bet dollars to donuts that every religion has such a figure. And philosophers have written volumes.

BTW, domineering people are not all males. The gals also need to check their leadership skills to ensure they are humane. Dominance is a yang trait that can manifest across demographics, and each of us has our own unique yin/yang profile regardless of how we identify. It's part of our fate.

I think coercive people are just bullies.

 

[jleeb05]

Just to be clear, I'm not trying to crush anyone into a mold. I don't think I'm seeking perfection. My type, if I have one, is probably not what society considers the ideal. I just feel that people on the spectrum, or at least myself, can focus on small details and lose sight of the bigger picture. I wonder how much, if any, this impacts, the search for romantic connection.

As far as the alpha male, I don't have much to say. I'm not sure I've ever met one but I imagine that anyone considering himself an alpha male is probably very insecure...

 

[GBWest]

I used to allow myself to get into all kinds of relationships at the drop of a hat.

I don't anymore, because they got bad enough that... well... I suppose every one's imagination can fill it in quite well.

 

[Suiseiseki]

I have always kept out of relationships because those who like me, really have nothing to offer me.
Like they and I have nothing in common, there isn't mutual attraction and they all seemed rather desperate and I am too old to be dicking around with that kind of nonsense.
I am not interested in picking up the bill for some single mother, I don't like children.
Now that I am in my 30s no one my age is happy so dating is pretty much over for me.
The ones who are left are left for a reason.

 

[RobZombiefan]

When it comes to dating, I go for smarts, personality, and looks but, I am picky. I turned down some pretty ladies. I don't want to wind up on an episode of snapped dead they were in relationships and, their boyfriends wanted to fight me. One even went to immediate me it backfired good thing he got back in the car. I would have broken every bone in his body in self-defense. I regret not showing his girl a good time just for him showing on my property to fight me. Over nothing, I didn't do anything with her. I was dating a girl who looked just like Melissa Benoist. Like why would I want his woman? But the next time, I, randomly, run into his woman bong Chicka, wow wow. In the meantime, I'm a swinger.