I have an odd way of looking at all of this. The fact is I lived decades of my life disadvantaged, trying to compete in a situation where I was different and misunderstood. For decades I had no idea aspergers existed and it affected my education, self confidence and ability to hold down a normal job. I saw a psychologist in the nineteen eighties when I was severely depressed and on meds but, at that time, there was still no familiarity amongst doctors with Hans Asperger's work or Lorna Wing. I often think that had I had the diagnosis years ago my life could have been so much better as it is today since finding out about aspergers has helped me regain control. When I concluded I had HFA some months ago I had a real hard time from friends and also a doctor I consulted. People were telling me there was no way I had "autism". Their argument was I could ride a bike, could speak more than one language fluently and could laugh and joke. This was a real hard time for me as I was doubting my own diagnosis, imagining that surely if I was on the autism spectrum I should be behaving in a more dramatic way. Now, after much research, I know I have HFA. I had to go back in my memory to early childhood because my parents now are too old and too indifferent to ever be interviewed but sometimes they tell me things that took place and it makes an impression. For example, my mother let it slip a few days ago she had to give up her job because I was unsettled at nursery school and that I was slow learning to read (typical of HFA). To be honest, for me, the whole thing just came together as the solution to one huge puzzle but, sure, I had major doubts at times and tried to keep an open mind. I mean, stuff like the sensitivity to fabrics which at first I didn't think applied to me and then I recalled there were trousers and shirts I simply wouldn't wear at school as they itched.
Back to the point: I did see a doctor but he seemed totally uninformed of high autism and finally referred me to an aspergers association which seemed far more clued up. So, I took the path of carrying on investigating aspergers and have now concluded that I have a new approach to it that may go against much conventional psychology due to the fact I have so many questions over aspergers. I tend to agree more with the group of psychologists that propose accepting the positive aspects of aspergers and then developing coping strategies for the negative traits (depression, isolation, anger, sensitivity, self confidence).
Actually I am one of those aspies you may meet who is not quite so obvious. My best friend had aspergers and was diagnosed professionally with the condition and his symptoms were far more obvious than my own (eye contact, shyness, stance, odd behaviour and higher more constant levels of depression. You only discover how deep my own symptoms are after some time, not at a superficial glance and these symptoms are deep enough to cause some people to often avoid me or call me "weird". Neither is the hurt you feel when you're ignored by family or people you know detected at a superficial glance which is why I urged caution when judging severity. We are all very different. Some of us cope better than others or have learned to act better in order to hold down a job which is why diagnosis is so complex an issue.
