Stereotypical autism traits being called stupid and exaggerated by people diagnosed with ASD

[vergil96]

Never got this ring stuff just jewelry I do not wear rings worked in factory moving equipment, no interest in losing a finger.

Yeah, that's why I got ear piercings and don't wear them a lot and didn't get more, even though when I was 20, I wanted like a lot. I like my ears whole, nose too.

 

[Ronald Zeeman]

You do not want to lose or damage a body part for fashion or making a statement.

 

[vergil96]

That again.

I make friends in the LGBT+ community, I check multiple boxes from the letter collection myself and want to relate to someone. There are a lot of people I meet there who are diagnosed with autism or are self-diagnosed. And they don't get my autism symptoms and don't accomodate them in any way, in a way that wouldn't cross my mind. For example, they think I'm uninterested if the area is crowded and I can't keep up making eye contact. They love to go to shopping malls and noisy crowded city centre (I don't request anything about it, but kindly suggest we go elsewhere if I get the chance, but I often don't, I'm being talked over and not listened to, because they don't take turns in conversations and you have to talk over someone quite often). They act surprised and uncomfortable about the fact that I want to wear headphones when we are somewhere very noisy. Or some people claim that this eye contact thing is like not a thing at all. Or meltdowns and shutdowns if you go to a shopping mall. I get meltdowns from going to such places, including their favourite "fun" places all the time. Some of them can't comprehend that I'm like living a normal life with these symptoms at all, because the symptoms they have are hard for them and I have even more pronounced ones - which I don't doubt they struggle. It doesn't seem to be that straightforward that someone has more pronounced symptoms so they cope worse. There are many factors at play that determine how you cope. Some people have such a combination of traits that the drawbacks come out, some, like me probably, have such traits that it doesn't matter. At the university that I'm at and at my degree (computer science), there are plenty of people similar to me both in terms of symptoms and functioning. Plenty of people who are doing fine, want to take classes online, and don't go to shopping malls. There are also plenty of people who struggle wirh autism a lot and aren't very communicative, so I wouldn't write it off as something that is rare and doesn't exist. I mean, there are people who don't speak much at all and don't make friends and don't make eye contact and don't small talk and would rather do everything online. And there are people who don't understand facial expressions at all, clearly have significant prosopagnosia judging by their facial expression, and who can't read other people.

I don't know what I expect, I'm just sharing it. It's frustrating. Especially the remarks about not keeping up with eye contact and being uninterested. And being treated like some kind of weird person or a specimen of what was suppised to not exist even by allegedly weird people.

 

[MNAus]

I'd be frustrated too. I can forgive people who have never encountered ASD before and so are clueless about the topic. But people who are diagnosed being so utterly unaware of quite simple concepts, like people having differing experiences of autism, is lazy. I mean, diagnosed on the spectrum and thinking someone not holding eye contact is unacceptable? Ridiculous.

 

[vergil96]

I find it much easier with most people, actually, they pay attention to other things as well, I know that I have trouble recognising faces as faces and it carries over to "irrelevant" facial expression. But I make it known that I'm listening with posture and replying, "active listening". It's like many people notice the intention, even if the result is suboptimal.

 

[Ronald Zeeman]

When some one demands that I look Them in the eye I when Speaking is very annoying. have to bite my tongue urge to loosen some of their teeth is very strong.