Struggling with most things, totally confused

[Streetwise]

I am in Durham. Which is best? Thanks.

query do you know if Durham county is included in Tyne and Wear northumberland primary healthcare trust if so you would be diagnosed by that team if not don't bother.

 

[Simon rowlan]

I would say to your GP more or less what you said in your post, that you think you have ASD, would like to be assessed, that you have learned coping mechanisms and to mask your ASD so it's not always so visible on the out side, but internally you are struggling. If you think that it is affecting your mental health, relationships and employment, you should mention that, too.

You could write out a list of traits for your GP, and give real life examples of how the traits affect you.

Wow, that makes so much sense to me. This is definitely affecting me badly lately, I don't know if it's years being worn down or just too much happening all at once, trying to avoid melt down. Thank you for your advice. Si

 

[Simon rowlan]

Hi Simon I think for me it's been useful to read a lot and Google and find information and ideas I ve done that for years and also online tests can be helpful indicators I ve done a big range of ghost. I don't know if I d be diagnosed as it can be hard in UK to get a diagnosis if you look like you are coping probably depends who you were to see. However I don't feel I need a diagnosis to acknowledge I have high autistic traits and a non neurotypical brain as I have understood over time that my internal experience is not neurotypical . There's plenty to read here and interesting threads and people are helpful informative and supportive. I hope everything you enjoy it here.

Thank you, will Defoe keep googling, cheers

 

[Simon rowlan]

Hi Simon, welcome!

Thank you

 

[Simon rowlan]

Hi Simon, welcome!

Thank you

 

[Simon rowlan]

I just got a referral 2 days ago

I had just given up hope that I would get one and at 68 thought it was impossible now. But I consulted my GP because my social anxiety has gone through the roof since the death of my daughter a few weeks ago, so I asked whether I should seek help with that which is a long term condition, or just go for grief counselling. She referred me to a grief counsellor then pondered CGT but I pointed out that I remembered having the anxiety at age 6 and have often wondered if I was on the spectrum. We agreed that CBT might not help then she said 'but you have managed so far what would it benefit you to have a diagnosis?' I said that I would have access to the local support group and be able to socialise in a safe place. She accepted!

Someone on another thread challenged me when I said I could not expect a diagnosis now! She was right - THANK YOU'.

Sounds like there are a lot of people trying to avoid giving diagnosis, trouble is aspies struggle to articulate so asking fir help is difficult, catch 22 situation, it's never too late to try to find some peace and understanding, good luck to you, thank you for your advice

 

[Simon rowlan]

View attachment 43272 I wasn't diagnosed by GP ,in my area it was an autism team ,i've never heard of a GP officially diagnosing autism .
i'm in north east England . don't mask your traits, I think I was diagnosed because I couldn't stand still I was standing up rocking from side to side looking very agitated, one of the signs the GP looks for is if you are in that state can you answer questions that are current ?

I wanted to ask gp to refer me to specialist, worried she might look at me and think I'm not aspie because I can hold conversation up to a certain degree, although always struggling with it.

 

[AO1501]

... I don't know if it's years being worn down or just too much happening all at once, trying to avoid melt down. Thank you for your advice. Si

Trying to manage in a world where you are the different one is hard work, particularly when you almost have to try and pretend to be the same as everyone else so much of the time, is all really tiring and stressful.

From what you say about yourself, I think you're doing pretty well, but that just helps medical professionals ignore you all the more effectively. When you talk to your doctor and as (really well) advised explain exactly what you said in your first post, don't try and hide behind the pretense of being like everyone else. Be who you know yourself to be. Your doctor will get a much better idea of who you are from that.

 

[Simon rowlan]

Hi Simon and welcome

I am also unofficial, but hope to at some point be official.

I know EXACTLY how you feel. I even brought up the subject to my dr, with heart pounding and with her saying she has heard of aspergers and then, a little while later, shook her head and said: sorry, but no, you do not have autism. I have many patients who are autistic and you are not like them and thus, ended the conversation!

People who know me quite well, actually do accept me as an aspie, even though they know I am not official and well, either positive or negative, which way one wants to look at it, my behaviour shows I am different and thus, why they do not question the authenticity of it all.

This forum will make you feel that you are not some strange oddity and in fact, make you feel quite normal and is refreshing to come here, when you have to deal with nts through the day.

ps. Another aspie on here, suggested and excellent tip for me, which is working. I am currently seeing a psychiatrist and next week, also a psychiatric nurse and concentrating on one aspect and that is the extreme social phobia I have. In fact, it supercedes the aspergers really.

I saw a social worker during the week and at first, with precaution of being laughed at, mentioned aspergers, at first, she was pretty incredulous and demanded when I had been tested and so, well, I could not pretend I had ( I am from the uk, but live in France) and so told her the truth. Thankfully, that kick started my husband who joined me in relating my "strange" habits and she started quickly scribbling something down on her paper and feel sure it was related to aspergers.

So, if you can find something else you struggle with mentally, then use that as your sort of "sounding board" to reach aspergers.

Hi Suzanne, thank you, much to ponder on, I'm still feeling like I need to be official, perhaps there are many aspires who aren't official. Still feeling like a reject/ weirdo though. My head says I'm not weird, but something within me still thinks I'm weird, perhaps in time this will change. I'm so nervous about seeing doctor, seems I need to be very prepared. Thank you for your thought.

 

[Mary Lyn]

query do you know if Durham county is included in Tyne and Wear northumberland primary healthcare trust if so you would be diagnosed by that team if not don't bother.

No l don't think it is. I wonder whether l should go straight to Morpeth then cancel the Durham appointment when it arrives. You said we could self refer?

 

[Streetwise]

No l don't think it is. I wonder whether l should go straight to Morpeth then cancel the Durham appointment when it arrives. You said we could self refer?

no you can't self refer !if you don't think it is keep the Durham appointment !!!!you wait months to be seen don't lose the chance!

 

[Mary Lyn]

Sorry to be so thick but is the Morpeth team better? I could ask my GP to reappoint me there. It was just Thursday l saw her. Thanks for your help.

 

[Streetwise]

Sorry to be so thick but is the Morpeth team better? I could ask my GP to reappoint me there. It was just Thursday l saw her. Thanks for your help.

I have no idea !I knew nothing about autism diagnosis til the GP said autism and then said Northgate hospital!morpeth ,my diagnosis took an hour and a half ,it was three people -three women asking me questions at different times.
find out about the person who could be diagnosing you in Durham .
The hospital at Morpeth it's supposed to be good but that's for inpatient after you've been diagnosed ,don't know the reputation for diagnosis .

 

[WereBear]

My challenge was finding a diagnostician with the qualifications to diagnose adults, and in my case, a woman.

So much of everything about autism is based on people in early childhood not meeting developmental goals. An adult who obviously has throws them off and sends them into "but you must not have it because..." So I had to emphasize my own circumstances and track down someone who specialized.

Likewise, I think the effort put in to getting to see the right person at the outset will save even more trouble for you during the process.

Also, start now in "getting in touch with your Aspieness" when you are alone and free to do so. I made an effort to "just not make the effort to normalize" during my diagnostic process, lest I skew the results

 

[Simon rowlan]

Hi Simon I think for me it's been useful to read a lot and Google and find information and ideas I ve done that for years and also online tests can be helpful indicators I ve done a big range of ghost. I don't know if I d be diagnosed as it can be hard in UK to get a diagnosis if you look like you are coping probably depends who you were to see. However I don't feel I need a diagnosis to acknowledge I have high autistic traits and a non neurotypical brain as I have understood over time that my internal experience is not neurotypical . There's plenty to read here and interesting threads and people are helpful informative and supportive. I hope everything you enjoy it here.

Thank you so much for responding, a great deal to figure out and get my head round. Thank you

 

[Simon rowlan]

View attachment 43272 I wasn't diagnosed by GP ,in my area it was an autism team ,i've never heard of a GP officially diagnosing autism .
i'm in north east England . don't mask your traits, I think I was diagnosed because I couldn't stand still I was standing up rocking from side to side looking very agitated, one of the signs the GP looks for is if you are in that state can you answer questions that are current ?

Hi, do you mean that your gp saw you were in a bad state of anxiety so therefore felt you were aspie. Not sure what you mean about asking questions that are current?

 

[Simon rowlan]

My challenge was finding a diagnostician with the qualifications to diagnose adults, and in my case, a woman.

So much of everything about autism is based on people in early childhood not meeting developmental goals. An adult who obviously has throws them off and sends them into "but you must not have it because..." So I had to emphasize my own circumstances and track down someone who specialized.

Likewise, I think the effort put in to getting to see the right person at the outset will save even more trouble for you during the process.

Also, start now in "getting in touch with your Aspieness" when you are alone and free to do so. I made an effort to "just not make the effort to normalize" during my diagnostic process, lest I skew the results

hi, thank you for your help. So perhaps I should bypass gp, I'm starting to feel I should find specialist. I still feel for me that self diagnosis isn't enough, although I'm definite I have it. Thank you so much. Si

 

[Simon rowlan]

Hi Simon and welcome

I am also unofficial, but hope to at some point be official.

I know EXACTLY how you feel. I even brought up the subject to my dr, with heart pounding and with her saying she has heard of aspergers and then, a little while later, shook her head and said: sorry, but no, you do not have autism. I have many patients who are autistic and you are not like them and thus, ended the conversation!

People who know me quite well, actually do accept me as an aspie, even though they know I am not official and well, either positive or negative, which way one wants to look at it, my behaviour shows I am different and thus, why they do not question the authenticity of it all.

This forum will make you feel that you are not some strange oddity and in fact, make you feel quite normal and is refreshing to come here, when you have to deal with nts through the day.

ps. Another aspie on here, suggested and excellent tip for me, which is working. I am currently seeing a psychiatrist and next week, also a psychiatric nurse and concentrating on one aspect and that is the extreme social phobia I have. In fact, it supercedes the aspergers really.

I saw a social worker during the week and at first, with precaution of being laughed at, mentioned aspergers, at first, she was pretty incredulous and demanded when I had been tested and so, well, I could not pretend I had ( I am from the uk, but live in France) and so told her the truth. Thankfully, that kick started my husband who joined me in relating my "strange" habits and she started quickly scribbling something down on her paper and feel sure it was related to aspergers.

So, if you can find something else you struggle with mentally, then use that as your sort of "sounding board" to reach aspergers.

Thank you for taking the time to help me, there's so much for me to learn about something which I have lived with all my life. Amazing that I still don't get it yet, looking forward to learning now I'm on the forum. Thank you so much. Si

 

[Simon rowlan]

I would say to your GP more or less what you said in your post, that you think you have ASD, would like to be assessed, that you have learned coping mechanisms and to mask your ASD so it's not always so visible on the out side, but internally you are struggling. If you think that it is affecting your mental health, relationships and employment, you should mention that, too.

You could write out a list of traits for your GP, and give real life examples of how the traits affect you.

Thank you so much, definitely need to be prepared for doctor, might just try to find specialist independently. Still nervous about going to gp, need to try to psych myself up for it. Thank you for your help. Si