The Worst Songs Ever

[AGXStarseed]

A song from an animated film that is one of only two that have won Razzie awards - this one for the now retired "Worst Original Song" award.

 

[Streetwise]

gloomy Sunday sung by billie holliday i know its about feeling low but its just terrible its tempting fate
then theres the birdy song from the 80s really irritated me
barbie girl- please spare me
star trekin(across the universe)another factory produced song

A while back, I was in a sports bar when they started playing the song "MmmmBop" by the Hanson Brothers. They showed the video and all. It made me want to vomit. I told the person I was sitting next to that I thought it was the worst song ever recorded. He laughed. The bartender joked, "It will only get worse before it gets better." I replied, "It can't get worse. This is the worse song ever recorded." The person sitting next to me replied, "Yes, it was a bad song, but it wasn't the worse song ever recorded. There was worse." That got me thinking: What were the worst songs ever recorded? Here's my list:
1. "Disco Duck" by Rick Dees
2. "MMMMBop" by the Hanson Brothers
3. "Hello Kitty" by Avril Lavigne
4. "Rockin Robin" by Bobby Day
5. "Achy Breaky Heart" By Billy Ray Cyrus

What are your picks for the worst song ever?

 

[Jet Weiss]

Oh, I love this thread Bad music makes me laugh more than almost anything.
Here are some of the worst (and funniest) ones I have ever heard:

This one is bad just because of pure stupidity, note the "England is my city" line...

This one is just... I don't know what he was thinking...

This one is by far the worst Dubstep song of all time. No explanation required.

I don't mean to deliberately pick on Polish music, but a lot of the pop music that comes out of that part of the world is quite bad.

This one is bad because the lyrics are stupid but you can't even understand them.

 

[Streetwise]

you must watch the bbc series QI entitled death
they play gloomy Sunday one of the team members Alan Davies is so understatedly expressive

Oh, I love this thread Bad music makes me laugh more than almost anything.
Here are some of the worst (and funniest) ones I have ever heard:

This one is bad just because of pure stupidity, note the "England is my city" line...

This one is just... I don't know what he was thinking...

This one is by far the worst Dubstep song of all time. No explanation required.

I don't mean to deliberately pick on Polish music, but a lot of the pop music that comes out of that part of the world is quite bad.

This one is bad because the lyrics are stupid but you can't even understand them.

 

[Jet Weiss]

Oh wow, I think I found something even worse than all the other crap I posted in this thread

 

[Fridgemagnetman]

gloomy Sunday sung by billie holliday i know its about feeling low but its just terrible its tempting fate
then theres the birdy song from the 80s really irritated me
barbie girl- please spare me
star trekin(across the universe)another factory produced song

I did write alternative words for barbie girl at one point -

'Im a Cardy man, in a caravan'

Back when i used to wear lots of cardigans...

 

[Judge]

Yes, this one actually ran on AM radio for some time back in the mid 60s.

 

[ksheehan88]

Anything by Justin Bieber or Britney Spears is top of my list.

 

[Alaska]

"Yummy, Yummy, Yummy, I've Got Love In My Tummy" candidate for worst. I believe that the same group also did, "Chewy, Chewy, Chewy".

It is hard to understand just how bad it is without hearing it, besides, I like to share the misery.

 

[Fridgemagnetman]

"Yummy, Yummy, Yummy, I've Got Love In My Tummy" candidate for worst. I believe that the same group also did, "Chewy, Chewy, Chewy".

It is hard to understand just how bad it is without hearing it, besides, I like to share the misery.

This was in my head as an example. I first heard it on the monty python show at the end of one episode. They replaced the people with cardboard boxes.

 

[Aeolienne]

I'd like to nominate Where Is the Love? by the Black-Eyed Peas. That was sooo done to death in the noughties.

 

[Beguiling Orbit]

Lots of good candidates, but I nominate "We Built This City" for the Worst Song (and Video) of All Time. Truly horrendous.

 

[Flinty]

I forgive all bubble gum pop, because it's almost always fun.

I have only found one song that has no redeeming features. Because it's 1990s Bryan Adams, it doesn't even qualify as an Atrocity Committed in the Name of Canadian Content (arcane CanCon rules stink).

This is a close second. It's not the worst because the lyrics are noticeably less vile. (And I swear that I don't hate Barbra Streisand that much. I can stand her earlier stuff.)

 

[watersprite]

This thread is funny.

 

[Mr Allen]

When I shared a Canadian playlist on Facebook recently (see Happy Canada Day 150!) I assured my friends that I would not play "(Everything I Do) I Do I For You" (Bryan Adams), "Mmm Mmm Mmm Mmm" (Crash Test Dummies), "My Heart Will Go On" (Celine Dion) or "Ironic" (Alanis Morissette). These would easily qualify for a list of worst-ever songs by Canadian artists. That's not to say that I didn't find other songs of theirs worth sharing however.

Some of us in the UK would disagree with your assessment of the Bryan Adams one, as I recall it spent 16 weeks at number 1 in the UK charts when it came out to mark the release of Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves way back in the early 90's.

Some of Celine Dion's stuff is decent, my Parents are fans, although that "Titanic" song is rather annoying I'll give you that

 

[pjcnet]

I thought I'd try something a little different and only concentrate on a few awful UK No.1 singles charts hits...

Firstly how did this total utter rubbish ever get to Christmas No.1 in the UK?

Well Mr. Blobby first hit No.1 in the UK singles chart on the 11th December 1993 for one week but later reclaimed the top spot to become the Christmas number one single. I remember people walking around proudly with stupid Mr. Blobby badges and other merchandise at the time, the media really managed to poison people's minds to pure insanity this time lol!


If promoters can get 80's and 90's children's TV presenter Timmy Mallet to No.1 in the UK singles charts with a cover of a 1959 novelty release named Itsy Bitsy Teenie Weenie Yellow Polkadot Bikini in August 1990 there's hope for everyone:

Timmy Mallet was best known at the time for presenting children's early morning TV shows Wacaday and the Wide Awake Club which appeared on TV-am in the mid to late 1980s and early 1990s on non school days. His rise into pop stardom with this track and video was truly abysmal, how did it actually sell so well?


Here's an extremely tacky UK No.1 hit that's so bad you just want to crawl up into a corner and cringe.

Warning, watch the following video and you might not beable to get this crappy repetitive track out of your head for days:

Billy Piper hit the UK singles No.1 spot with Because We Want To in July 1998, she was only 16 years of age at the time. This track has some of tackiest lyrics ever written and it's amazing it sold so well, unless of course you think they're good, then this song should have been put into the uplifting songs thread instead lol!


Here are a few honourable mentions with video links:

Crazy Frog - Axel F was a No.1 hit throughout most of Europe in 2005 including the UK, it was the 1st ever mobile phone ring tone to get to No.1 and is in my opinion one of the most annoying tracks ever released.

The Simpsons – Do The Bartman reached the No.1 spot in the UK in 1990, even though many people loved and still do love The Simpsons the song was in my opinion dreadful.

Bob The Builder – Can We Fix It? amazingly claimed the Christmas No.1 spot in the UK in the year 2000 and was in my opinion another very annoying track, it does absolutely nothing for me and I can't understand how it sold so well.

Tellytubbies – Tellytubbies Say "Eh-oh" reached the UK No.1 spot and stayed there for 2 weeks in 1997, it also remained in the top 75 for 29 weeks since it's release. I can sort of understand some young kids enjoying it, but why did so many adults like this trash?

B*Witched - C'est la vie is another track that makes you want to cringe / hide in a corner and it reached No.1 in the UK on the 31st May 1998.

Chef - Chocolate Salty Balls (P.S. I Love You) was featured and performed on an episode of the controversial animated TV series South Park and reached the UK No.1 spot in 1998, many people loved and still do love South Park, but in my opinion the song was awful.


Now it would be little unfair to say that the following is one of the worst tracks to get to No.1 in the UK singles charts because the performers were of primary school age (about my age back then), but I would still finally like to mention There's No One Quite Like Grandma by the St Winifred's School Choir from 1980, the link shows them performing on Top of the Pops on the BBC. It will certainly make you want to cringe if nothing else (actually I've just noticed who's jointly listed at the top of the rolling credits towards the end of the video and it makes me shudder - clue, he had an OBE even then and was later knighted - urgh, don't get me started!***).


Now please don't tell me that you love any of these tracks lol!

***Edit: The video link has been updated after it was removed from Youtube by the user, this version doesn't show the TOTP end credits which included a very controversial ex celebrity.

 

[Mr Allen]

Anyone remember this one?

Rat Rapping by Roland Rat Superstar - a popular British puppet back in the early 80's, along with his friends Kevin the Gerbil, Glennis the Guinea Pig and his nephew Little Reggie. I used to be a big fan when I was about 6 or 7, he had a show on BBC 1 on Saturday nights which was shown on a fictional BBC 3 (which of course is an online TV channel now).

 

[pjcnet]

How a good song can be turned into the worst song ever by an absolutely atrocious band cover:

It gets even worse just before the 1st minute. I don't think they should give up their day job lol!


Now compare a good cover of exactly the same song:

It's totally transformed, or do you still prefer the 1st version lol!


PS: Just in case anyone still doesn't know the song "Comfortably Numb" was originally by Pink Floyd and it featured on the classic album The Wall.

 

[Aeolienne]

Some of us in the UK would disagree with your assessment of the Bryan Adams one, as I recall it spent 16 weeks at number 1 in the UK charts when it came out to mark the release of Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves way back in the early 90's.

That's precisely the point - overkill, you see. However I admit it's hard to judge how popular the song is 26 years on. Maybe it's just me, but I've hardly ever heard it played since then, not even as background music for exercises in nostalgia like Back In Time For Dinner. It may well have been popular as a slow dance for wedding discos in its time - I wouldn't know, as I didn't attend any weddings during the 1990s (my grandfather's second marriage doesn't count).

Speaking of wedding slow numbers, Lady in Red by Chris de Burgh has been voted one of the worst number ones of the 80s. Apparently it was the choice of Prince Andrew and Sarah Ferguson for their first dance, so maybe their marriage was jinxed from the outset. Let's hope Harry and Meghan have better taste!

 

[Ste11aeres]

There are so many terrible songs that it's hard to pick one out as the worst. But if you want something laughably bad, try this. This song's actually interesting because you can understand why some people would like it, it is catchy, but still so very very stupid. Watch the video all the way through! It gets extra ridiculous when the guys in flippers appear.