Theresa never was my friend, despite what my parents love to tell me.

[Metalhead]

I find that this thread raises an interesting point of view (and one I agree with), which is that mentally ill people are sometimes deeply unpleasant. The two (out of three) people I personally knew who I hate the most both suffer from depression and anxiety problems. Even though I wish them well with their mental health issues, I still do not see it as an excuse for how they treated me and I get angry occasionally when I think about them (and I am very calm and agreeable). Cycles of abuse and all that. Same goes for autists who can be complete (rhymes with) sticks!

Theresa, your mother and especially your aunt sound like horrible people and you would be well rid of them. I wish you luck in finding useful outlets or coping mechanisms for your anger. It is completely justified but it doesn't seem to be helping you much in your current situation. At least you are venting here instead of drinking.

I feel like sitting outside on my back porch with a glass of ice water and popping some vitamin C to help with my stomach bug. That couldn’t hurt right now.

 

[Metalhead]

I regret that I let Theresa take over my life as much as she did. She always told me that nobody else was interested in anything I had to say whenever I made small talk with other people when she was around. I once went to a concert with her, ten minutes into the show I was giving somebody directions to his seat, and she screams into my ear for me to shut the hell up. Her behavior at my movie night groups was truly abhorrant. I printed out a schedule of what i planned to show. People showed up because they wanted to see those movies. But Theresa was the only one to always throw a tantrum and ruin the event for everybody else. I should have kicked her ass out the first time she did that. Instead, I allowed her to kill my movie watching group. That is my own fault.

I almost got fired from my job because she was always calling me there and demanding I give her money that I often did not have to give to her. She is the single most entitled person I have ever met in my entire life. I hope somebody punches her in the face one day, because she has become too comfortable in her entitlement.

 

[Metalhead]

If an older man brought hardcore porn to a younger woman’s place and got offended if she did not want to watch that with him, I swear my mother would be singing a totally different tune. Since she is an older woman who sexually harassed me, her take on it is that I should have empathy for her instead of being angry about that. Double standard. Lovely.

 

[Metalhead]

My mother brought up Theresa in conversation again, saying that it was very sad that I could not see what a great friend she was to me and that she wondered if Theresa decided to kill herself after I cut her out of my life.

First of all, Theresa was a good friend to nobody. She was and probably still is the kind of person who acts like a jerk to everybody and then turns around and claims her mental illnesses absolve her of all responsibility for her behavior. My mother bought that line when Theresa told it to her, and that makes me hate Theresa even more.

If Theresa did kill herself, she would have finally made herself useful and I should hold no responsibility in that.

 

[Thinx]

Good points, but should you move on from this? You changed, and you would not tolerate such behaviour now. We all change if we want to, over time. You know better now than you did then. The past is the past.

Simple shortcut I see here, stop having conversations with your mother. Your mother is a wind up merchant, and she's the problem here, you already solved the Theresa issue. Now solve the mother issue. You said you see now you should have cut Theresa out of your life more effectively and sooner. Who else does this apply to?

 

[Metalhead]

You are correct. I will only get more of the same if I keep engaging with her. I should build my own life without her input. It’s about damn time I started that.