yotimbo
Member
What is an agnostic theist?
I wouldn't describe that as 'militantly atheist', just an atheist. To me, militant atheists are the ones who start arguments and want to take things away from other people because they don't believe in it. People like Ricky Gervais where my reaction is "for someone who doesn't believe in something, you dedicate way too much of your time thinking and talking about it." Even as a strong atheist those people were annoying, just as bad as the hardcore bible bumpers who would look for any opportunity to shove it down your throat.
I'm still trying to figure out my own feelings on religion but if it helps you to understand how I believe there could be a God it was all about feelings. As I said I was depressed and suicidal for over 4 years and one day the idea of religion started nagging me out of nowhere and then the Jesus t-shirt appeared in my house. I don't know how that happened but it was enough to say I'll try it out, just to humour the idea. After a few days of reading bits of the bible and attempting to pray, I was feeling a lot better. I was smiling again, feeling more confident and went days without drinking without even thinking about it. Before that I was getting drunk every night just because that seemed to be the only part of the day where time moved.
It was almost certainly a placebo effect but it worked, and if it works then what's the harm? The problem is that I didn't stick with any of it and don't practice any religion and those old feelings creep back every now and then and are growing stronger and more frequent. I want to try and commit to it because the first time felt good and made it feel easy but I have too many doubts and questions about religion and I worry I'm too weak to change my behaviour for the long term. I believe there is a God in some form because the experience was so weird, almost too convenient, but also because it worked for me and helped me. I don't know for sure what happens when we die, and frankly I don't care. I'm alive now and I just want to feel something.
The reason people like Ricky Gervais talk so much about atheism is because of the annoyance of childhood experience being indoctrinated into a belief system that turns out to be questionable. If your belief makes you feel better and helped you through depression then thats fair enough even if it does sound a bit like a comfort blanket. The point we try to put across is simple which is that we think the god hypothesis should be treated like any other unknown and as scientists we cannot find a single piece of evidence to support the existence of a supernatural authority. The earth is 4.5 billion years old our existence here is a blink of an eye and human beings will be gone in another blink of an eye . What happens after we die is that our genes live on through our children and then their children and that is magnificent enough to comfort me.
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