What social things do you have difficulties with?

[chameleonov]

Eye contact is still very difficult. It works with some people and others it doesn't. Just yesterday had a meeting, sat down and had a conversation with a stranger and couldn't look them in the eye and glanced away. It just becomes difficult. I don't know how to solve it.

Too much background noise is also a conversation killer right away. I can't filter much as 'normal' people can with their ears(or brain).

If I meet a person and had a long talk with them earlier, the next day I see them, I don't know how to approach and start the conversation again. I never seem to make a connection with anybody. And it all just becomes weird as if I'm ignoring them on purpose. That's really painful. Like I'm the bad guy in all of this.

 

[Slime_Punk]

I feel like when meeting people, you have to 'sell yourself' on why you'd be a good friend, significant other, business relation, etc (fill in the blank for the occasion) and I just don't have that tool in my toolbox. If I don't have someone I can call on to help me with that part, there's just no chance it's going to happen.

 

[Outdated]

I feel like when meeting people, you have to 'sell yourself' on why you'd be a good friend, significant other, business relation, etc (fill in the blank for the occasion) and I just don't have that tool in my toolbox. If I don't have someone I can call on to help me with that part, there's just no chance it's going to happen.

That's the part of things I was always best at. You're right that you have to sell yourself, meeting new people isn't all that different to going to a job interview, but it's something I've always excelled at.

I always hated applying for jobs over the phone or even worse by email, I can't sell myself that way. Where I do best is in a face to face situation, I can be charming and charismatic and I'm very sensitive to other people's emotions so if I can get face to face with an employer it's almost guaranteed that I'll get the job.

It's the same thing when dealing with strangers in the pub, you have to put on the charm and grace a bit. You have to sell yourself. I have the same hearing and voice processing lag that you describe but I also have the gift of the gab. Or as my mother used to say - I could talk under water with a mouth full of marbles.

So my response to not being able to keep up with the conversation was to instead own the conversation. The more you talk the less you have to try and listen.

 

[Outdated]

@AngelWitch here's a picture of me from early 2016, caught in full rant.

 

[GrownupGirl]

Eating out in restaurants, especially if they are noisy and crowded and play loud music. Also I sometimes have trouble swallowing my food, especially soft, starchy food like potatoes or bread, and suffer a lot of pain and nausea and feel like the food is stuck in my chest. Not long ago this happened while I was eating out and while I fought it off in a minute or so I've been too anxious to eat out ever since.

Shopping for groceries usually leaves me feeling tired, stressed and irritated afterwards. Being a typical Canadian I must say "sorry" about 50 times each trip because I can't even turn around without nearly colliding into another shopper's cart and it's all just rush, rush, rush. If you can't do something under 3 seconds, like choosing from about a billion different products people think you're a snail. Having dyscalculia doesn't help either. I never really know just how much everything will cost and the rise in food prices and taxes don't help. It won't be long before we all die or forced to drink cockroach milk or whatever. I can never really enjoy Sundays because I have to go get groceries on Monday. It's hard to believe when I was in my 20s I wanted to all do my own grocery shopping, it made me feel independent and like an adult. Now it makes me feel like an adult with half her brain cells gone.

I don't have many problems with social things because there's rarely any other people around for me to socialize with, anyway. When I was younger and still in school and then living in a home where I was surrounded by people most of the time, however, it was a totally different story.

 

[Misty Avich]

I naturally make eye contact when interacting with people or if I know people. But walking past strangers in the street is a different story. Social anxiety suddenly gets the better of me and I suddenly become aware of where I'm looking. If I avoid eye contact, I can still sense them looking at me as they pass and that makes me feel even more self-conscious because why would they be looking at someone who isn't looking at them? If I try to make eye contact as I'm passing it feels very forced and awkward and I don't want to make them feel awkward or self-conscious, or I don't want to see them staring at me.
It's why I don't always like going out on my own, like for a walk.
Eye contact is easy-peasy at social events where I know I'm going to be meeting people even if they are strangers, I still have no problems.
If I worked in a public place I wouldn't have any problems making eye contact with customers, because it's less awkward and usually you're interacting with them in some way so it's OK.

Yes, I'm weird.

 

[naotakun]

I can't read between the lines, can't understand and differentiate between people with different characters. I treat everyone the same unless they are rude to me.

I'm a terrible judge of character, and it's so frustrating. Like, how was I supposed to know the coworker asking about my religion on their first day was a sign they were going to be overdramatic? Everyone else said it was obvious, but apparently not to me!

 

[CountryGirl]

I have difficulty with empathy awareness and understanding why others feel the way they do and what things i should and shouldnt say

 

[meow123]

1) I don't seem to be able to tell when someone is progressing to being irritated, annoyed or upset. With family members, it means that they often end up getting very upset with me, and with friends, I overcompensate by asking them repeatedly if they're annoyed with me, which is annoying in itself.

2) I constantly interrupt in group conversations.

3) I speak in a very loud voice. People always ask me to use my "indoor" voice.

4) My friends tell me I have a tendency to be in my own world and can't keep up with group conversations.

 

[Misty Avich]

Sometimes I want to have a humorous conversation that I had before with the same person, because I enjoyed the conversation so much (because it made me laugh). But after impulsively trying to relive the conversation the other person usually interrupts as if to say ''we had this conversation earlier, it's not funny this time'' (but they don't say that, I just know their reaction means this). Sometimes though, people do like to relive a joke and do actually repeat it again, so that is what I hope when I try to do it lol.

 

[lovely_darlingprettybaby]

Being PPD-NOS I don't have as many social difficulties as the average autistic person might, but there are some things that I'm awkward with.

1. I am often called nosy because I get so intrigued and curious about what's going on in the workplace (ie, gossip). I find most people feel the same and they seem to be able to find out social information without people rolling their eyes and thinking "so nosy!" But me, I'm not sure how to be discreet when trying to find out gossip. Sometimes I can see people looking annoyed so I have to back away and keep a low profile. But then I know nothing, while everyone else seems to know about everything that's going on with everyone.

2. I find it so hard to assert myself, unless I'm really close to them. But with friends and people at work, I'm scared that if I assert myself it might escalate into an unwanted argument, and I don't like arguing. I think it's because it brings me back to my childhood days when I used to bicker a lot with my peers and my mum used to say "nobody will like you if you keep arguing with them". So I'm still afraid of that today, and I don't want to be seen as argumentative at work. So it feels easier to just nod in agreement or let people talk to me rudely. It's easier said than done to assert yourself. Also when I'm in that situation I can't always think of the right thing to say to defend myself. It's like the words get stuck in my throat and I'm just looking at them and opening and closing my mouth like a goldfish.

3. I'm not too good at first impressions. When meeting people for the first time I do feel willing and excited but also quite nervous and I have to picture in my mind how I'm going to be, to perfect my first impression. The best thing to do really is to not think into it too much and to just go along with the flow. Being so I do trust my social instincts most of the time, I know that I'm not really going to make that much of a fool of myself if I just go with the flow. But if I do fail at first impressions I can get severe social anxiety/RSD.
But I remember when I started college and met all these new teenagers I'd never met before, I actually did make a fool of myself trying to be confident and chatty. One ended up calling me a freak, not in a mocking way but in a stubborn way, and they avoided me after that. I felt so embarrassed, that I couldn't attend college for a couple of weeks and had to sign off sick. Luckily when I returned I made some friends, although the person who called me a freak continued to stay away from me but that became less of a big deal, because as long as they were leaving me alone and not bullying then they can do what they like.
I learnt though from that experience is to just be myself. Let myself be shy. If you relax and make it obvious that you're shy then most people will understand. If you try to hide your shyness by seeming loud and chatty, you're going to make more social errors and people will more likely judge.

The things I have noticed..
I mask a lot with neurotypicals and find masking common for me even with people sometimes she love me for me
Get burnt out easily
Do not like being the center of attention unless maybe I'm really familiar with the people in small groups
Do not.like admiration
Do not like being like minded
Do not enjoy talking about talents all the time particularly with neurotypicals
Do not always like making eye contact
Talk too much about myself and never listen to others but do not like always talking about myself incessantly
Do not like always understanding others feelings and problems or issues or reasons on an interpersonal level
Do not enjoy intrapersonal but can do it.
Sometimes enjoy caring about others feelings just when I want not constantly and incessantly
But it is mainly because I care and I like to build others up.
Want to help people the way I want not when it is expected
Am not a good leader
Am an empath but as u said do not always enjoy interpersonal or being at people's beck and call
I am altruistic person where I enjoy doing acts of kindness and giving back to others, I think it comes from being am empath where I do care and want others better off.
I like giving food and things etc but I also like shopping on myself, not always enough money for both but sometimes I would honestly give what I wanted to help another but I am burnt out now.
I love giving gifts too but sometimes I over give and burn out because I will always think of presents ways to make others happy and then realize it is too much but so wanted to do it.
I do not like fake compliments of admiration which is tricky I like genuine compliments when a person genuinely has something nice to say because they appreciate and love you.
Love being respected for what I have to offer even if others are not as intelligent
Get social anxiety sometimes
I sometimes want to say things I cannot like that might sound arrogant or offend another person like if I do not agree with them or like what they are saying like if someone said I like reality dating shows I would feel like maybe saying let's not talk about them they suck or I hate the thing you like and do not agree and then you have to mask you do so as not to offend them.
If people feel dwarfed because of my talents I feel bad and awkward
Idk what else
And I forgot I like to say what I'm thinking directly to someone's face sometimes and if I can get away with it I will. So if I think they are wrong I will happily say it and be honest about it and secretly be grinning inside when they get mad and I prove then wrong.
In my trauma I honestly want to say rude stuff and nut people out because I do not always understand why they act the way they do and I want to get to the bottom of it but I also realize it may not be healthy.
If I find a women to be egotistic to their face I will want to say it:
But one I am afraid of them a bit.
And...I do fear bitches because they can really hurt you
But in the past I have tried to be honest with them at times
I do not like confrontation though in an aggressive way and would avoid it or back down or not think it worthwhile