I wonder if I’ll ever be able to live on my own or at least in a semi-independent manner. Don’t want a group home, far too much forced socialization, but maybe some form of assisted living. Unfortunately the only sort of thing that might work for me and is even remotely near us waited until partway through the application process to tell us that having a job is a requirement for the program (and yes, I did read everything on their Web site and thoroughly read all paperwork we were given (I’m the weirdo who actually reads everything before signing), and it was not mentioned anywhere - in fact, it was mentioned that they could help find employment, and stated several times in a boastful manner that they had a 100% employment rate (leaving out the fact that that’s probably only because they don’t let anyone who’s unemployed in)). That’s another thing I may or may not ever be able to do.
I really want my own place so I can just start from scratch and have a clean, organized space of my own, rather than having to work through all the dust and grime and clutter here at my parents’ house - I think it would do wonders for my mental health. By managing my own apartment, I’d feel like I was actually doing something, and the only person I’d be a burden to is myself (unfortunately I would require assistance of some kind, but hey, they’d at least be getting paid for it). I wantto have a neat, tidy place and don’t mind cleaning (hey, I was a janitor for a year and a half or so... granted that’s in large part because that was the only job I could get...) but our house just completely overwhelms me, is why I really want to just start from scratch.
Unfortunately, it looks like there is no assisted living program or anything that would accept me in my area (Kansas City metro, Kansas side), and I will probably end up living with my parents until they can no longer care for me, and then I’ll be foisted off to some relative or another. And we can’t consider doing anything at all even if it turned out that the perfect place had opened up two blocks away from us, not until all the COVID-19 stuff is over and probably once I’m as close to back to full health as I’m getting, which won’t be for a long time yet, in all likelihood. So why should I even bother wondering now? I’m very much in a “have to take things as they come” position, but I want to know if I have anything to look forward to, and if so, what? And when? I hate just not knowing anything.