When worlds collide: A hazard of compartmentalizing people

[Maelstrom]

Well pfthpfthpfth (that's a virtual raspberry!) to you for only considering me worth talking to when you're bored!!

....no fair I invited you down to the chat box at least once.... your's is different from Laz-es I can't remember how it goes piffft? I find hers quite amusing too.

insults don't work if you're cute....maels going to get in trouble again

I have a more witty come back involving a strawberry but am pushing my luck already.

 

[Nadador]

I am not exactly a social maven, and far too honest to play the game. I am on the other extreme end of Asper, I am not quiet, reticent or ashamed. I am so loud, bold and proud that I cut through the field of social wheat like a thresher, avoid and am avoided like an epicurean pariah.

I'm stumped as to what this response has to do with the post you quoted, or much at all of this discussion, but nonetheless, I do find something to pursue in it. Cheers for that.

You mention being too honest to play the social game. I can relate to that statement, as I am often accused of being a bit too unrestrained in my own candor. So, from your point of view, is it possible that honesty is not the crux of social problems for many who are "loud, bold, and proud"? Could it rather be, that a good portion of those who so love to proclaim themselves this or that, are actually just obnoxious, and tedious company? It seems that some people tend to become very skilled at self-delusion whilst they are purportedly embracing their true natures. What a paradox. I wonder if there is any cure for that peculiar brand of narcissism. Where it occurs, it's dreadful to deal with.

Thanks for the 'Follow', by the way, Epicurean Pariah. And to Slithytoves, my apologies for taking your thread still further from its origins.

What aspects of a person does the term 'ones own nature' refer to? Is it qualities such as being quite, loud, outgoing, controlling, forthright? (I ask because I'm interested to know more about what being true to ones own nature means.)

Is it possible for there to be aspects of ones own nature that are self destrictive, or is it only behaviours that are self destructive? Is it possible for a persons own nature to get in the way of them achieving what they want to achieve?

I hope you won't mind my interjecting, Vinca. You ask good questions, which I believe I can answer simply.

As EP noted, one's 'nature' is their fundamental self...their essential identity and character. 'Quiet' or 'loud' as literal qualities wouldn't apply [the others you mentioned would]. As figurative language for the personality type that goes with those terms, however, then yes, they could be considered aspects of nature. Fair enough?

To be true to one's own nature means to follow, by your actions and the way you choose to view things, those fundamental qualities of who you are.

Now, to your more nuanced questions.

I would suggest that one's essential nature would not be inherently self-destructive, unless you would count a personality that is, from birth, deeply disrupted by mental illness or disorder. Environmental-experiential factors can impede on one's nature, however, inducing thought and behaviour that can indeed be self-destructive.

Yes, I do believe that one's nature can hinder realisation of their aspirations. For example, an innately very introverted individual would have an extremely hard time becoming a tour leader or politician, if one of those was their dream. Aspects of one's nature may often be overcome with effort, but not always. It generally depends upon on the extremity of the quality in question. Does this make sense to you?

 

[Slithytoves]

And to Slithytoves, my apologies for taking your thread still further from its origins.

Oh, heck -- this thread has been all over the place. I just think it's cool that it's still going, in whatever form.

I like your new tangent but I'm going to have to think about what I can add that would be of any value. I've met a lot of the people you describe, and I'm at the point where it's too sore of a subject to be totally academic about it.

 

[metalminx24]

[emoji14]....no fair I invited you down to the chat box at least once.... your's is different from Laz-es I can't remember how it goes piffft? I find hers quite amusing too. [emoji14]

insults don't work if you're cute....maels going to get in trouble again

I have a more witty come back involving a strawberry but am pushing my luck already.

Go on, I'd like to know this 'witty comeback' , I reckon you've got nothing except "nernerner " (take the bait?!)

I don't remember being invited to the chat bit (sorry if my memory's rubbish) but I can't get that on the app anyway, I have to log on to a different bit online (faff!) I can get threads and PMs here.

Ach pifft works just as well, what are you doing to get such a reaction on multiple occasions??

 

[Maelstrom]

Go on, I'd like to know this 'witty comeback' , I reckon you've got nothing except "nernerner " (take the bait?!)

I don't remember being invited to the chat bit (sorry if my memory's rubbish) but I can't get that on the app anyway, I have to log on to a different bit online (faff!) I can get threads and PMs here.

Ach pifft works just as well, what are you doing to get such a reaction on multiple occasions??

Well I don't want to get in trouble with a cute girl who is writing me.

But my silly comback metalminx24 would be I think it is more fun to give strawberries s to cute girls than rasberries.... but I mostly would only do that with a girlfriend so you are safe...

 

[metalminx24]

Ooh smooooth! And I'm definitely safe, in my impenetrable bunker made of bulletproof sofa cushions and indestructible duvet

 

[Maelstrom]

Ooh smooooth! And I'm definitely safe, in my impenetrable bunker made of bulletproof sofa cushions and indestructible duvet

Nice to see some one with a sense of humor we could use more of that sometimes here...

What is a duvet? ....some sort of fancy couch ...does your bullet proof couch come with repellent for over controlling possibly new mother inlaws?

Eeeeee! they are kissing on the couch call the police

 

[On the Inside]

Is this what you're asking for, or do you need more on it? I'd hate to expose you to an unwanted Googling.

Yes, that is precisely what I was after.

The hypothalamus connection concerns me a bit because I had MRI's and CAT scans of my brain in search of abnormalities that might have been the cause of grand mal seizures when I was younger (several from age 3 to 24, none since). What they found was that my hypothalamus was abnormally shaped, and smaller than usual. The neurosurgeon told me that since the hypothalamus develops mostly in-utero, that there was no cause for concern, it most likely functions normally and that it wasn't the cause of my seizures. There was more to his explanation, but that is mostly what I recall.

I am relieved to not have to google it. I once googled our local public school system and their website was piled in amongst sites offering school girl porn. Definitely not what I was looking for.

 

[On the Inside]

Yes, I do believe that one's nature can hinder realisation of their aspirations. For example, an innately very introverted individual would have an extremely hard time becoming a tour leader or politician, if one of those was their dream. Aspects of one's nature may often be overcome with effort, but not always. It generally depends upon on the extremity of the quality in question. Does this make sense to you?

I agree about one's nature hindering aspirations. I have had many aspirations and dreams for which I was poorly suited, yet I still pursued them, sometimes for years. In some cases, prolonged intensive effort overcame my limitations, in others, it simply wasn't going to happen. An old musician friend of mine wrote a song about such pipe dreams.

 

[Tom]

It's pretty understandable from an Aspie perspective, not wishing social groups or individuals to chaotically collide like swirling galaxies.

I have the same trepidation.

For me part of it is that my persona is adjusted to different people or groups differently. With this one I have this mask, with that one another.

If everyone knew the raw me it would be less problematic in the meeting but more problematic in general.

 

[metalminx24]

Nice to see some one with a sense of humor we could use more of that sometimes here...

What is a duvet? ....some sort of fancy couch ...does your bullet proof couch come with repellent for over controlling possibly new mother inlaws?

Eeeeee! they are kissing on the couch call the police [emoji813]eyes:

Nooo, I'm perfectly repellent as I am!!

A duvet is the lovely puffy thing that you put on your bed instead of manky blankets, not a couch (Argh, that word should be banished along with lounge and moist, bleurgh!!)

[emoji13]

 

[Maelstrom]

Ooh! sounds comfy...like a big soft down quilt?
what do you call couches over there?
No! moist...Hmm...then how will I write her kiss was moist and tender and she sighed like a dove...