Your worst faux pas

[Darkkin]

We had gone to the midnight release of Lord of the Rings: Fellowship of the Ring. I had been listening to this score on repeat for nearly two weeks before the movie opened. As it was December, my friends took me for my birthday. The theatre was jammed, but it is LOTR, I could cope until the movie started. (Keep in mind this was around the time the original Matrix Trilogy was still pretty big. This is important for later.)

The movie started without incident and we were at the part when Frodo was waking up in Rivendell and Lord Elrond fades in. It was out before I even knew I said it. 'MR. ANDERSON.' The entire theatre heard me...and thankfully just started laughing. Oops.

 

[Luca]

I had a pretty bad faux pas in a movie theater too, actually twice

The first time, I don’t remember what movie it was, but I laughed hysterically at something and I guess it was a bit too loud, because the guy in front of me stood up and turned around and yelled “Shut up! Shut the [bad word] up!!!”
I was so shocked that I didn’t even say anything, and I was silent for the rest of the movie.

The second time, I was at a movie with my mom, and I put my feet up on the seat in front of me, thinking it was empty.
Nope.
There was a girl there and she was really angry at me!

 

[Gerontius]

I went up to the front of an outhouse once while camping with the Boy Scouts & turned the standpipe in the yard on high. It had a few feet of hose on there which went to whipping around all over the place spraying water on anybody unlucky enough to need the outhouse, be sitting in the outhouse, or walk past it. I do not know why I did this except at that time I was a great deal younger--but it looked like how Michael Bay would've turned on a water faucet.

But I can't talk about Michael Bay chaos without explosions.

So there was another time where I & my kid brother were paying attention when Dad was reminiscing about the 1970s, back when men were often emotionally incomplete and kids were anarchy manifest, and the great favorite toy was the infamous tennis ball mortar.

We did not have tennis-ball canisters, but we raided the recycling bin again and got us a pile of old tin cans to make the barrel & carburetor out of. We put the whole thing (wrapped in duct tape) on a homemade gun-carriage made out of scrap plywood and went to the front yard of our little 1950s bungalow, in a neighborhood of very similar little bungalows of very similar poor mid-century taste, and touched her off.

Our cannon worked better than we could have hoped. Every window on that block rattled, glasses & pans shook in the kitchens--the cooler neighbors reported they felt it shake the foundations of their houses; the real Hyacinth Bucket type of neighbor came swooping round the corner of her house puffed up and mad, yelling something about she heard somebody shoot off a cannon. Course we already knew that; not sure why she had to say it.

Neither Emily Post nor Archimedes nor that guy from Mythbusters ever explained the nice way to shoot a cannon in a neighborhood. We grabbed up the still-warm evidence & beat a retreat.

Our tennis ball went half a block & was only stopped by a treeline, but my brother & I decided our next projects would be a lot quieter. So we dug this huge trench in the backyard that showed up on Google Earth even after we were told to go fill it in.

 

[Fino]

I can hardly survive a social situation for five minutes without one, but I can't really remember specific ones.

 

[Thinx]

I think I'm probably too careful and cautious in my approach to others to have anything to report here. I am rarely if ever spontaneous in public. I blend into the background, it's my superpower. I think I worked on that subconsciously from infant school onwards. With good reason, due to the confusion I often felt.

 

[Mary Terry]

It's funny you know, this already has similar qualities to starting a joke with, "A horse walked into a bar."

To someone who's never been to America, it seems oddly incongruent that there should be Roman Catholics in Texas. That never gets any press so it's not in the overseas imagination - that's full of skyscrapers, Dallas the terrible old TV series, longhorn cattle, George Bush, big hats, Texan ties, etc etc. I guess like a lot of US people, when thinking of Australia, think, "Kangaroos, spiders, Crocodile Dundee, Sydney Harbour Bridge, koalas, beer."

Of course, it's logical that there are Roman Catholics in Texas, but I had never thought about it before!

Texas used to be part of Mexico which has a strong Catholic tradition. Most Mexicans are Catholic. But I understand why someone not familiar with the history of Texas wouldn't know that. Remember the Alamo!

 

[Crossbreed]

This thread should include our favorite "shoe leather" recipes...!

Foot in Mouth

~~~~~~~~​

If the only time you open your mouth is to change feet,
you might be autistic...!

 

[Shaddock]

the first time I was in a subway restaurant, I was much overstrained, because I didn´t knew how the "procedure" works. First I said "1 sub please" instead of saying "half/whole italian/oregano (bread)", than to what meat should be in the sub, I said "everything", the customer laughed and said "this is more than you can eat." and in the end when I finished I didn´t knew what to do with the dinner tray.

don´t ask me how but it ended in the fact that the dinner tray was in the trash can and stucked there, I failed to get it out there. After that I went out of the restaurant and hoped that noone saw me. forgot to say that my "friend" the whole time did nothing, just laughed at me and when I asked him how to do some things, he just ignored me and never helped me.

another one: I was in the bathroom of a shared appartment and about to begin to shower. my clothes were off and I realized that I forgot my towel. I was 100% sure that my flatmate was not at home (because he said that he will arrive later). normally I would put my clothes on again, but this time I was too lazy, I went out of the bathroom and my (male) flatmate (who arrived 2 minutes ago) opened his door and well... I ran into the bathroom again, instantly closed the door and showered without towel. I only left the bathroom without clothes once and never did it again.

not my fauxpas but from a female classmate some time ago: she had a big bust size and weared a cleavage and we were about to carry some things out from a truck for the school. she stood in the truck and bowed in front of me and others while talking with someone. another girl said "nice view" and then she noticed that we could saw entirely everything.

 

[Autisticool]

Someone knocks on your door at night and you're not expecting anyone...don't even answer. I never answer my door even during the day unless I'm expecting someone. This isn't because I'm fearful; it's because I don't like dealing with people. As for nighttime, it IS suspicious at 9 pm; could've been a plot to burglarize your home (even though it was a glorified tent) or some other criminal activity.

Don't answer the door unless you're expecting someone.

 

[Callistemon]

Someone knocks on your door at night and you're not expecting anyone...don't even answer. I never answer my door even during the day unless I'm expecting someone. This isn't because I'm fearful; it's because I don't like dealing with people. As for nighttime, it IS suspicious at 9 pm; could've been a plot to burglarize your home (even though it was a glorified tent) or some other criminal activity.

Don't answer the door unless you're expecting someone.

We each deal with things in our own way, and I'm happy with the way I handled the situation, other than the faux pas.

I personally am on the whole comfortable dealing with other people and able to assert myself, so I have no issues whatsoever answering my door to strangers. It would not have been my style at all to pretend not to be there. There's sensible precautions and Plan Bs for various situations, but I'm not going to live in this world cowed by other people, or judge the whole box by some bad apples. Besides, I like most people. Even if they have different world views from my own, provided they don't become annoying about it.

My neighbours never broached the subject of religion with me again and we remained good neighbours comfortable talking to each other. I did feel that that time, I owed them one for the faux pas - and I felt that was a fair exchange!

 

[Darkkin]

It is probably more of a general politeness faux pas than personal faux pas, but if I'm home and people are canvassing our neighbourhood, I gate the dogs in the living room and let them look out the window.

Rue is very loud, protective of his home and people...and Zwi is just plain huge (total sweetheart, loves people), but he's intimidating solely because of his size. Canvassers get halfway up the driveway, see the dogs and think better of it. Potato Cat occasionally joins in on the antics, too. And he's a big ass cat, 14lbs of long boy fierceness.

I certainly respect people's opinions on religion and politics, but do not bring it to my door. I do not have the spoons or patience to listen to soap box thumping.

 

[Aspychata]

My earlier faux pas were so bad they fell into a giant volcano and were never relived again. I then just take responsibility for the stupidest things that fly out of my mouth. Like the time l told a lady her daughter's Halloween costume looked like big bird. Her daughter struggled a bit with preteen weight. But in my defense, it was big bird yellow, and bird bird is so cute on Sesame street show.

 

[Slim Jim]

I don't keep a list in my mind. But I'm sure many were committed.