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AuroraBorealis

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  • I bought a plush animal today and I was so happy when I found it! Wearing headphones (because the store played too loud music), jumping up and down smiling because we had finally found the right kind of plush pokemon, it was probably the least masked I've been in public (apart from overstimulation/meltdowns) I remember. It was so great!
    Starting tomorrow, my partner will be home again all day too. I love them, obviously, but it's been so good to be alone at home during weekdays until the afternoon. I need to figure out strategies to get enough alone-time and to unmask enough to not have meltdowns - haven't fully managed so far.
    Anyone else hates booking travels? I just spent around 2h booking flights, trains and buses for a planned trip (after procrastinating it forever), and I feel like my brain has run a marathon.
    M
    Misty Avich
    I go into the travel agents to book my holidays, as I cannot do it by myself online. I like to be able to ask any questions that usually a computer can't answer
    V
    VictorR
    I'm probably the opposite - I love working out itineraries. That being stated, sometimes too many options can be overwhelming.
    There's a slight change in my plans - a trip that was supposed be 3 weeks from now has been moved up a few days. I know it's not the end of the world, but my body reacts so anxious you might think my whole future depends on it.
    Judge
    Judge
    So many of us can have such adverse reactions to change, especially when they are perceived as those "best made plans".
    AuroraBorealis
    AuroraBorealis
    Yep. And the annoying part is that my brain knows that those changes are usually not that big of a deal, but I still can't help the anxiety kicking in.
    I feel lonely. I'm very lucky to call a few people my friends, and I have an amazing partner. But I miss having "my people", a group of people where I can be completely myself, unmasked, and loved and accepted for that. I feel like I haven't found them yet, and I don't know if I ever will.
    M
    marc_101
    Work on that feeling of belonging. You don't have to be exactly like others to belong. It's just a feeling. Took me many years and I still fail at it, but not as bad.
    AuroraBorealis
    AuroraBorealis
    @marc_101 What do you mean by "work on it"? Like, how exactly?
    M
    marc_101
    Hm, good question. Not sure, working on it myself. For me, it's a conscious effort to change my mindset. To focus on similarities rather than differences. To tell myself that I belong. Wish I had a better answer.
    I'm getting more and more overwhelmed right now from everyone talking and the TV on during family visit. I just secretly put in my earplugs, thank god they're fairly inconspicuous.
    I'm on holidays at an amazing, exciting place and all I want right now is to go home. I just arrived today, but I miss my home, my safe surroundings, my boyfriend and our cat so much... I can't just quit because it would disappoint my sister so much who's with me, and I won't do it and it's probably also exhaustion and massive overload right now, but I needed to be able to say this out loud.
    Aspychata
    Aspychata
    Sorry to read this. Maybe the rest will go by fast.
    AuroraBorealis
    AuroraBorealis
    Thank you for your answers. It's better by now - I slept 12 hours the first night and that surely did some good. I still miss home and my boyfriend, but I'm not that sad anymore. It's somewhat overwhelming but we're taking it easy and I used my earplugs at particularly crowded and noisy places, which helped.
    It sure it beautiful here. Just difficult to adjust.
    M
    marc_101
    Yay! If you're like me, you won't want to come back in a couple of days :)
    Does anyone else feel the urge to copy down scenes from series/movies as a sort of manuscript, either in exactly the way it's played, or with an alternative ending, and can't stop thinking about the scene until it's done and "out of their system"? That's sort of my comfort thing to do. Got about 30 or so written out scenes from different series/movies on my computer, some in various editions and different languages.
    Forest Cat
    Forest Cat
    I did that when I was a kid, not really sure why, I just liked doing it. I remember I watched E.T and then I wrote down the entire movie afterwards. From start to finish, with descriptions of all the scenes. It took some time, it's a 2 hour movie.
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