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UberScout

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  • Update: Along came Gladdog with a basket of goods! Thanks to Maddog having a good day for once, i got some assistance with my intense anxiety! Hey, quick question, is anybody else seeing C++ code in every object they look at? I mean i'm okay i'm used to feeling this focused but i'm pretty sure i just mentally hacked our microwave to make food colder now.
    Feeling better..... I'm beginning to notice something about my PK. It seems to be strongest and seems to start working during moments of intense emotions or even intensive thoughts. Even if i'm not focusing or thinking about doing it it still happens... Yeah, there's no way i can doubt or second guess now, i'm pretty sure i was some kind of jedi or something in a past life.
    NOW I'M OVERWHELMED WITH STRESS BECAUSE WE HAVE TO HAVE A SOCIAL WORKER VISIT US TWICE A MONTH. NOW I HAVE TO HAVE THE RISK OF LOSING MY LITTLE SISTER AGAIN OVER MY HEAD, AND I ALREADY KNOW PRAYING TO GOD WON'T MAKE IT GO AWAY BECAUSE IT NEVER DOES!! I DO NOT WANT THIS ANYMORE! WHY CAN'T I JUST ABORT LIFE AND BE AT PEACE?!
    Forest Cat
    Forest Cat
    It's important to stay calm, freaking out makes it worse. You can't control life, no one can, only how you react to it. That's the important thing, not freaking out.
    Aspychata
    Aspychata
    Yes. But it's because of Maddog. So you just have to grin and bear it.
    UberScout
    UberScout
    I shouldn't have to and hearing myself think that just makes me want to escape more.
    PK is getting stronger: paper plate was laying on my wicker drawer and as soon as i walked into the room it fell. At least i'm making progress somewhere!
    Aloe: Last seen circling SusanLR for protection from negative energy, making her rounds on her way back to me
    I remember having a splitting headache and just being so intensely frustrated with Maddog that i just screamed for like 10 secs. straight; when i did, i heard maybe 2-3 objects come off my wicker drawers and hit the floor. Of course they were angry that i was screaming but i know i'm getting stronger now!
    Oh yeah, in other news... My *gift* is getting much, much stronger. I know most of you are skeptical of things like psionic/PK or psychic powers but as i've always said i keep seeing results. This time it was during the last fight i has between me & Maddog (next status because character limit)
    Aspychata
    Aspychata
    I do feel more accepting of special senses. But many don't accept it or are frighten of it or think you are weird. And then some people are just very curious.
    UberScout
    UberScout
    Eh. It's to be expected. I've had doctors at the behavioral health hospital agree with me though. And i could tell they weren't being sarcastic or just pretending to agree too. Don't know how that happened but i'm not questioning it.
    Note to self: do NOT drink water immediately after smoking. You WILL feel like you have a stomach bug.
    Maddog is talking about alcohol again. I have something for self defense this time, and i'll make sure it's used for what purpose it serves. And i won't STOP using it until that 400 lb drunk beast is unconscious!
    tree
    tree
    Your step-father weighs four hundred pounds?
    UberScout
    UberScout
    Something like that. And yet he's somehow able to move faster than a quarterback headed for a touchdown. If not faster than that. I've had times where i've ran from him during a fight and when i made it to the front door, he caught it as soon as i opened it, closed it, got in front of it and kicked me away. If I tried to get up he'd stomp me back down. If i tried to crawl away he'd grab my legs and pull me back.
    UberScout
    UberScout
    Maddog is not a person. He's an animal made to look like a human being.
    Healing self with binaural beats and isochronic tones is working some more. Aloe is with me as always. Just letting her wrap me up and do her thing.
    S
    Slime_Punk
    Untitled.webp

    Here it is! Sorry, I'm slow to respond sometimes :)
    UberScout
    UberScout
    Oops, sorry buddy! I was in a bad mood when i said that, i'm feeling better now but i hope i didn't hurt your feelings! Thank you!
    S
    Slime_Punk
    I also have a few others on another BC account but I'll have to check how many free codes they gave me over there. If you want to mess with those as well, I'll send them over!
    Aloe has a cousin. Of course i thought her up myself. Her name is Violet. She's similar to Aloe, both in appearance and personality but with a few.... Differences. She's still nice, she doesn't harm people but the difference between her and Aloe is... She knows when something you did is wrong... And she'll let you know, too. With mirrors. And illusions.
    So desperate to get high this morning i just broke up a few stems and some tobacco and a resin ball and just smoked that. Don't care, just want to not be consciously thinking today. Doesn't look like i'll get my usual dose of d8 today so i might as well just smoke whatever i can find. Who cares anymore.
    Do not ever look for help in this world. You will not get it. Autism is not something that family will evee accept.
    AprilR
    AprilR
    Yes, the only one who ever helped me was myself.
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