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36 and still feeling like I did when I was 17.

You said that you've overheard people speaking unkindly about you in real life.

This is a support forum where the intention is to be helpful, not unkind.
 
Supposedly the library should be a hub for social groups but I’ve had no luck in that regard. There’s a writing group but only women are allowed to participate in it.
 
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honeytoast said:
Maybe you can make one yourself that's just for dudes?
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I don’t know how to go about making one. I imagine it would require having substantial income and good social connections, two things I don’t have.

The college I’ve been to was supposed to have a writing club but when I inquired about it, the club coordinator told me it wasn’t currently open. I asked if she could help me in that regard and all she did was tell me to go around the campus with a flyer and ask people directly if they were interested. She seemed annoyed at my presence and wanted me to go away. I found out later she opened three clubs (A Baptist Christian one as well as NAACP and LULAC ones) on her own.

I did get to take a creative writing course at the end of 2022. Sadly, it was a onetime course and it never came back. Even the people who wanted to keep in contact with each other didn’t follow through.
 
Public libraries are free.

Starting a writing club at the library wouldn't take lots of money.

I think personal expenses involved would be writing tools (paper, pens/pencils, maybe
index cards, using your home PC) and the means to attend the meetings.

You could get the ok from your supervisor at work for putting up announcements.
They might have suggestions.
 
There’s an email address for someone who might be the coordinator of groups at the library. I’d honestly feel more comfortable writing to her because my supervisor is difficult to talk to.
 
Markness said:
Supposedly the library should be a hub for social groups but I’ve had no luck in that regard. There’s a writing group but only women are allowed to participate in it.
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I checked the Temple Public Library calendar page and there is a writer's group that will meet at 2:30 p.m. Saturday February. 22 called "Words In Progress." It is designated Adults 18+ "all are welcome."

https://www.templelibrary.us/calendar.php

1739315207308.webp
 
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I looked further on this. Presuming that this is the library in question (because I don't see another library listed for the City of Temple) - I can't find a women's only writing group.

https://cms9files.revize.com/templetxlibrary/Calendars/2025 March Web.pdf

I do see a women's authors group - but that is a book club that reads books by women writers - and the group is for anyone - women AND men.

So where did you see this women's only writer's group Mark?
 
The women in a city near me have a group called: Women over 45 and never Married. So it's a serious problem for either sex from what l see. I didn't marry until like 38 because we took it slow. And l also felt like you in that l would never be in a real relationship. I pretty much gave up. Then l started talking to a guy about a year older than me. He was quirky, and l liked that. Then l realized that we both loved listening to music, we loved good food we loved the beach. l really liked that he is a low-key , kinda of relaxed person, so that was in his favor. So just strike up conversations with women, ask how is going. If they are interested , they will find a way to stop back and chat with you.
 
Masked Man said:
I looked further on this. Presuming that this is the library in question (because I don't see another library listed for the City of Temple) - I can't find a women's only writing group.

https://cms9files.revize.com/templetxlibrary/Calendars/2025 March Web.pdf

I do see a women's authors group - but that is a book club that reads books by women writers - and the group is for anyone - women AND men.

So where did you see this women's only writer's group Mark?
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https://www.templelibrary.us/families/services_and_programs.php

It’s called “Stories to Tell.”

The workshop happens on a day I am scheduled to work.
 
The library is currently short staffed. In fact, only three people, including myself, will be around for the last hours today.
 
This might be the worst advice ever for your liking, and to many here who might think it was a dumb idea, too, but I will give it anyway. Consider joining a local chapter of Toastmasters in your area. Contrary to perception, these groups are not just for people who want to become some business leader or motivational speaker type, but for those wanting to either just improve their communication skills, to make it more easier for them to approach others because of more social skills or confidence, and to make others want to approach them more too.

For those those wanting a support group where even the most timid and fearful can join and participate as much or as little as they please (in person and/or zoom depending how that group is set up) until they feel more comfort and learn what the group is all about, and where several such socially anxious members are usually members and present, and for those wanting kindness shown to all regardless of race, gender and condition, and to receive support for their efforts but to get constructive feedback too where they can be the best social version of themselves, and for those wanting to increase their chances at making new friends, this may be an option for you.

The expectation for new guests and members in my opinion is that most will have some social and leadership difficulties that they want to improve on. Perhaps some who attend may find that such groups benefitted them much, whereas some may find that specific group was not for them. Regardless, the key to me seems to be trying different things and researching to see what could work, works or does not. I just know from my experiences with the above group, everyone was supportive and I gained confidence using my writing skills and their help, support and direction to benefit my speaking skills, and had I been single I felt I made a couple of close friends that may or may not have turned to more.

From what I saw, women members seemed to not shy away at all from speaking to me and other guys there before and after the several meetings I attended, after visiting that support group as a guest after searching for one where I felt I would be the most likely comfortable with that chapter based on their policies, members, and setup. Maybe part of feeling not left out there was because of their policy to include all, but also as they sensed we were giving our best in joining and being there to be our socially best, regardless of any social limitations and results they saw, so we earned their respect. Also, likely women were receptive to speaking to us also because they felt a common bond with us in each of us wanting more comfort in our communications, and as they saw benefits in getting more practice and feedback with us too. Some may have been hoping for more friends their too, regardless of gender.
 
Markness said:
I turned 36 this year but I still feel like I did when I was 17. Even when I got my driver’s license and became able to go out on my own, this still didn’t change the fact I was socially isolated because I don’t fit in with the culture I live in. Apparently I am now at the age where I can’t even feel sad about being socially isolated because it’s somehow a bad thing. I’ve even been told to stop being like a baby and got screamed at by my father for being depressed.
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If knowing this can help you, I don't think you are the only one.
As different as our situations are, I am 21 years old, but compared to a few years ago, I don't feel different, I don't feel that I have made an “upgrade,” maybe I have even regressed. So, I want to tell you that you are not the only one who feels this way.
 
tree said:
How many people actually are employed by the library currently?
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I would say about twenty people, maybe a little more. Not everyone works in the same divisions, though. Using myself as an example, I am in the circulation division and don’t work in the reference one.
 
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