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36 and still feeling like I did when I was 17.

Yes, but only if you read and apply the insights.
Keeping the book under your pillow and hoping
for magical transformations won't work.
 
I tend to compare my life to other people’s lives. Even when I was a little boy, I wondered why someone else had something I didn’t have. It got worse as a teenager when I saw other guys who were getting to interact with the girls.
 
Do you live with your parents still, Markness? I recall you said this somewhere, but I could be wrong?

Living with one's parents can make a person feel a lot younger than if they achieve independence by living on their own or with other adults.

I appreciate with the economic climate that we live in, not everybody is able to do this quickly, or in some cases at all.
 
Do you live with your parents still, Markness? I recall you said this somewhere, but I could be wrong?

Living with one's parents can make a person feel a lot younger than if they achieve independence by living on their own or with other adults.

I appreciate with the economic climate that we live in, not everybody is able to do this quickly, or in some cases at all.
I live with my mother and stepfather.
 
I live with my mother and stepfather.

This could be a reason for feeling like a perpetual teenager, especially if you still live in your childhood bedroom. In any case, living with ones parents usually makes a person forgo a certain amount of freedom in some respects, i.e, privacy can be an issue, especially in the realm of dating and such.
 
This could be a reason for feeling like a perpetual teenager, especially if you still live in your childhood bedroom. In any case, living with ones parents usually makes a person forgo a certain amount of freedom in some respects, i.e, privacy can be an issue, especially in the realm of dating and such.
My childhood bedroom is three houses in the past for me. The house I live in now has actually been the longest one I’ve lived in.
 
One of the classic questions often
asked first when a person reaches
adolescence.

Why am I here?
What is the point?
What next?

etc
My mother hoped I would become a yuppie and was exasperated when I didn’t turn into one.
 
I compare myself and my life to others too. I don't want to do it and I don't do it deliberately, my brain just seems to process information that way and sends a wave of depression through me whenever I'm reminded of being the only Aspie in the family.
 
How to compare yourself with others fairly | Psyche Guides
Wow, that was a really great article, very thorough and helpful. I really hope people read it through.

I thought this part was especially useful:

"Here are some of the domains in which you might compare yourself with others, and examples of specific responses that could be personally relevant, aspirational and productive:
  • Social: following through on commitments to others; building social skills by asking questions, showing interest or sharing details about your life; being assertive about your preferences, feelings and limits; acknowledging others’ accomplishments; or attending meetings for an organisation or hobby.
  • Personal growth: building a skill by completing online tutorials, watching videos, getting lessons, playing a sport or taking a class.
  • Conscientiousness: prioritising unpleasant but important work, school or household responsibilities that you’d normally procrastinate on.
  • Health: engaging in dietary, fitness, medical or other self-care activities.
  • Community service: seeking local opportunities for volunteering, activism, sharing knowledge or mentoring.
  • Vocational: developing your résumé, looking for work, seeking a promotion, networking, asking for feedback, giving a presentation or taking steps to start a small business.

Begin by identifying one or two small changes in one or two of these domains that you believe will help to counter the cognitive and emotional effects of previous, unhelpful responses to social comparison. Remember that commitment and practice are more important than making big changes. Behaviour change is like building a muscle, and you have to do your ‘reps’ to see the results of your efforts. Try to engage in these behaviours several times a week for at least a few weeks to see for yourself whether your changes make a difference."
 
I worry that my cousins who know I am single think I am a loser for not having a partner like they do.

I also occasionally still get asked why I don’t have children like my siblings do.
 
I worry that my cousins who know I am single think I am a loser for not having a partner like they do.

I also occasionally still get asked why I don’t have children like my siblings do.
I get worried that people think I'm a loser for not having children. I do want just one child but I just can't bear all that pregnancy and pain and childbirth. I am very pain-sensitive and squeamish. So many other women on the spectrum seem to have kids and bring them up all right.
 
I get worried that people think I'm a loser for not having children. I do want just one child but I just can't bear all that pregnancy and pain and childbirth. I am very pain-sensitive and squeamish. So many other women on the spectrum seem to have kids and bring them up all right.
Personally, I value the concept of anti-natalism.
It is becoming popular, these days. :cool:
 
I compare myself and my life to others too. I don't want to do it and I don't do it deliberately, my brain just seems to process information that way and sends a wave of depression through me whenever I'm reminded of being the only Aspie in the family.
I am a "Personal Best" sort of person.
I have no need to compare myself with others.
Ultimately, we all end up in the same place.
"Oblivion". 😻
 
I am a "Personal Best" sort of person.
I have no need to compare myself with others.
Ultimately, we all end up in the same place.
"Oblivion". 😻
Apparently you were wondering why I don’t want “advice” from you. To be honest, you’ve made many jokes and jabs about my situation. That makes me think you don’t have any genuinely serious advice for me.
 

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