The idea that males with Aspergers have it harder than females with Aspergers is debatable, in my estimation being aspergical doesn?t affect your male or female self, it affects your socialization and interaction, therefore that actually would put aspie females on par with aspie males because having Aspergers would discount previous theory, you would now have to study an entirely new target group on which to base your belief, and as there is no research (or is there).
Aspergers affects people to varying degrees sure, but to say it would be the deciding factor in your remaining single would be pointless, a social disorder is superseded by a watered down version of our most basic instinct, which is to procreate
The basic truth is that all the books and all the so called experts in the world can say all the things they like about anything, at the end of the day it all comes to one thing, the individual.
If you want a partner it has to be you that goes out and gets one, any book can't go out and get you a girl, it can suggest ways that might work, it can provide supposition and hypothesis, you are the one that has to do the work and you will interpret the suggestions given in the way that you do, effectively rendering said supposition and hypothesis essentially moot simply because every scenario you find yourself in is one you allowed to happen and it changes with what you are, not the information from a book, regardless of how closely you follow that book.
If you want a woman with which to be friendly, go to the supermarket and go through the checkout, have a chat to the girl and take your groceries and go home, mission accomplished!
But if you want something more substantial then only you can decide how that plays out, every single person in here can give you advice until the cows come home and it wont make a lick of difference because they will all be wrong in your opinion, because what they did isn?t what you will do in a similar situation.
If you work in the sewer and you want a supermodel there is no reason whatsoever you cant have one, but... its probably more realistic to say that simply wont happen, because as you so rightly point out, that is not the way the world works.
Take the show "Beauty and The Geek" for example, those guys where still themselves at the end of the show but they where so much more.
I think the only advise that rings true here is be yourself, be honest with yourself and be fair to yourself and that?s what most people have said in different voices.
First, never be anything your not, any relationship whether it be friends, drinking buddies, lovers, family or any other, never does well when formed on a basis of lies. be yourself at all times and if you think nobody likes you then perhaps it is the people you associate with that are keeping you in a detrimental mind set. It turned out that my own family where my biggest hurdle regarding self esteem.
Second, ask yourself what you are willing to accept, if you only want a specific type of woman and have such a narrow field that is going to limit you so severely as to cut off the supply, simply broaden your scope, if that women has buck teeth or small breasts or she's "fat", all these things are stopping you from being honest with yourself, why cast her aside? She may be absolutely perfect for you, but because she has cross eyes she is suddenly not worthy? Maybe she is looking at you and thinking that you are unsuitable because you part your hair on the left? Stupid isn?t it? Find something in yourself that allows you to see people for what they really are and not what you would like them to be, there are plenty of people out there in the scenarios you suggest but an equal number are legitimate couples that have seen past the flaws to see the person their with.
Third, I ask you to be fair to yourself, if you actually feel you deserve to be with someone, then you do, just try to be sure it's someone you deserve. If you be fair to yourself then you accept that you may not be rich and powerful, you may not be a Calvin Klein underwear model and have a huge... portfolio, there?s every possibility you may not even be worthy of having a statue commissioned of you, but if you are fair to yourself you will realize that you have exactly what someone out there desires, and because there are so many people on this planet, the odds are heavily in you favor that there is actually more than one person that feels you'd be a catch.
Or is it that you merely want to bump uglies? because a fist full of fifties can get you set up at your local tavern/ pub/ bar, there are plenty of women (and men) that are so desperate for love they are willing to give away sex to see if they?ve found love with the next bloke that walks in, so, line up at the bar, buy lots of booze for lots of ladies and see what happens, if you like alcohol and women who drink it then your in like Flynn.
