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Could use some unofficial advice with kindergartner... In need of serious help

Small update: He got to retake the big test of what he learned in kindergarten, and passed! :-D He's in first grade now. His school removed the foreign language class though and is using the time slot for extra reading, reasoning the foreign language probably confused and overwhelmed him. He is getting set up with an IEP this year to ensure his needs are met. He also has his own case manager now, a therapist, and soon a behavioral specialist as well. I'm so glad he's finally getting all the help he needs and that he is doing better. I was really worried about him.
 
rollerskate said:
Update....

He's back from the psychiatric hospital and now on ADHD medication. He's like an alien. He's not zombie, but he is so calm and focused and well behaved I keep wondering if he can really possibly be the child I gave birth to. He actually making ME look bad with my own ADHD, LOL.

Still dealing with meltdowns, issues with changes and transitioning, stimming, sensory overload, etc. Only now with the ADHD out of the way, the autistic traits are way more apparent. Oddly the ADHD seemed to be driving his extroverted social behavior, because now he keeps to himself and doesn't attempt to play with other kids hardly at all.
Click to expand...
Oh, I understand what you mean. The control of ADD/ADHD in me and in one of my three kids who is like me yields the same result: aut is more apparent. And treating ADD does nothing for sensory issues. But school performance vastly improves.
 
Hi...my son is autistic and is now 12 yrs old. I just read through your post and I understand how hard it is for u. It is clear how much you love your son and that you are a good parent with his best interests at heart. We have been through many roller coaster rides through the years with my son and schools. Being a parent as well as a professional in the field, I have learned that how successful ur child is in school really depends heavily on how the adults around him respond to his challenges. Unfortunately I have learned the hard way that just because a person has credentials beside their name...that does not make them experts on ur child...or even necessarily good people for that matter. You are the person who knows your child better then anyone else and u should trust in that, and if a teacher is not a good fit then it is up to u to make a change. And it's not an easy thing to tell a teacher, or a one to one, that they are not working out but I always told myself that I don't care who I have to offend as long as my child gets what he needs and gets the best. In the end the teachers and principals ended up respecting me more for it and for knowing my rights as a parent (very important) and when I felt something was needed I ended up receiving quick responses to the issues and immediate changes. If this teacher is not going to do EVERYTHING in her power to help ur child as if he were her own then I would do everything in my power to let her know that her attitude needs to change and it won't fly. It IS her job to help your child learn in whatever way he needs to to understand the information and for as long as he needs to regardless of how inconvenienced she feels...that is just tough luck for her...she should consider a career change if she can't handle it. And I don't mean to sound so harsh. .i just want you to know deep down that it is your right as his mother to demand the best and I wouldn't let anyone get in the way of that. There are a lot of resources that schools can access that they don't tell you about unless you ask and it's important for parents to know this. I hope u understand what I'm trying to say. I would be more than happy to answer any questions you might have and i have been working with special needs for almost 15 years now and have a lot of ideas that could help with school and at home. I hope it works out for your son. Hang in there :)
 
I'm sorry I forgot to add this as well...what you are in need of for your son is called a neuropsych and a psychosocial assessment. You can start by speaking to your child's regular physician and they can make the referral for you to see a specialist. The specialist will be able to do testing and make the diagnosis for your child and then the school will have a more clear path to follow. I hope this helps. :)
 
I am struggling with my sons school and his behavior. He is such a sweet child most of the time but I know he has a low frustration tolerance. Any thoughts? Any feedback would be great. We are from a very small town so it makes it hard.
 
Hello,

There are probably some triggers that lead to frustration for him. I guess it would be to start small and work on the things that frustrate him. I find mindfulness and DBT most useful. I also had a very low frustration threshold when I was a child and would get in trouble often. Part of it was that I am a very independent person and tend to do my own thing. In a school setting there is little room for independent thought or process. As I got older however I did grow out of it, so there is a bit of hope there. However, my cousin who was more severe than me and more closely followed had supportive parents that encouraged him. He also went to a school for children with autism and various developmental disorders and mental retardation. So this did help him.
 
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