Depression - Just Snap Out of It

[King_Oni]

I find it interesting to read that some of us mention a "wandering mind" in relation to being unemployed as cause for depression. I can totally understand this train of thought, yet I don't know if it applies to me as much.

I actually get more shaken up and outright depressed when obligations come in the way. I believe it has to do with the fact that I need to spend large amounts of time on something to actually enjoy it. If I can't do that, I just wander endlessly and never complete anything, which adds to frustration and depression.

There's also something to be said about actually being employed and depression. A wandering mind can also be the result of a boring job. And way to often have I ended up in temporary jobs that actually got me more depressed because of said "wandering mind".

 

[_Josh_]

I actually get more shaken up and outright depressed when obligations come in the way. I believe it has to do with the fact that I need to spend large amounts of time on something to actually enjoy it. If I can't do that, I just wander endlessly and never complete anything, which adds to frustration and depression.

I can identify with this too quite a bit. I won't buy a new video game during the summer because I get so focused on completing the game, unlocking all items, ect and I'll totally abandon my responsibilities. The grass will get a foot tall for instance. LOL It goes with the needing to spend alot of time on things to truly enjoy them and getting so focused. My model building hobby also comes to mind. If it turns out to be a fairly simple model and I complete it quickly, painting, glueing, emblems and everything, it's not satisfying if it didn't take me a long time to complete, and even the difficult ones that take more time that are satisfying, once I complete them, I feel a bit down. A quote I tend to say often when I'm finished with a game or model or good book comes to mind... "Welp, fun's all over now!.... Bummer" Then I get bored and my mind wanders.

 

[King_Oni]

I can identify with this too quite a bit. I won't buy a new video game during the summer because I get so focused on completing the game, unlocking all items, ect and I'll totally abandon my responsibilities. The grass will get a foot tall for instance. LOL It goes with the needing to spend alot of time on things to truly enjoy them and getting so focused. My model building hobby also comes to mind. If it turns out to be a fairly simple model and I complete it quickly, painting, glueing, emblems and everything, it's not satisfying if it didn't take me a long time to complete, and even the difficult ones that take more time that are satisfying, once I complete them, I feel a bit down. A quote I tend to say often when I'm finished with a game or model or good book comes to mind... "Welp, fun's all over now!.... Bummer" Then I get bored and my mind wanders.

Heh... the most interesting thing with me is I don't even have a lot of obligations. I live at my parents, and I don't have a job. But the few ones that are around, annoy me enough. Especially when they're "scheduled" things like dinner. It's a minor annoyance, not a major cause for depression though.

My big problem is that most of my interests and hobbies are really time intensive. Like you do some model building (even if it's for tabletop games), and I usually get into the vibe of painting after about 16+ hours in one go, lol. That's where the problem starts. Same goes for working on music, writing, illustration and to some extent reading. I take really long to get into things to finally feel comfy. I sometimes go on for 3 days without sleep and feeling really fine cause I'm actually enjoying myself.

Reminds me of something a therapist at college once told me (when I saw him on a regular basis).. he noticed that the way I need to process things is way off, to what's "normal".. .in his words "24 hours a day is not nearly enough for you to enjoy yourself on a daily basis".

I actually believe that because of my position now (living at parents, no job and receiving social security) is in fact a reason why I can keep myself busy with things that work for me (and are probably cheaper; since a therapist will set me back more financially than that new game, book or model kit... not to add, it will keep me busy for more than an hour)

 

[NeverEnder]

I cannot just "snap out" of my depression. It haunts me. It causes symptoms which cannot easily be overcome at times.

I feel so weak because of it all.

I do think I should have more control over it but I do not.

That's not to say every moment is miserable-- It is not. I laugh at least once a day and there is something that keeps me going (But I do not know what it is.)

I take one day at a time-- That's all I can really do.

 

[wyverary]

I take one day at a time-- That's all I can really do.

That it is.

 

[total-recoil]

I discovered recently that I get depesssed usually because my mind is so active it needs to be directed towards a goal or project. The worst thing I can do is allow my mind to ponder on my problems and the negative situation around me so I now actively encourage myself to go off into my own world and just focus on my interests.
Another big thing that helped me was to connect with animals and take care of them. I get on find with animals and it relaxed me to be with them, play ball games with the dog and so on.
Aspies do get depressed as it's not easy to cope with being different than most other people. However, once you accept youb are different and you are what you are, I think it helps to alow us to move on. I don't mind having aspergers really but, sure, I know how severe depression can be and still am prone to occasional paranoia and temper outbursts. And by paranoia I mean when you're suddenly depressed you imagine people are speaking negatively about you or may dislike you and all of this is hard to handle when it does happen.

As I have been studying more about Asperger?s, I have learned that depression is a common thing. Depression has been something that has plagued me off and on since I was a boy, though I never knew why or understood what it was.

My question is do all Aspies suffer from depression? If so, is the depression a result of the Asperger?s or a result of the ramifications caused by the Asperger?s. Also, when depressed, has anyone been told, ?You just need to snap out it??

Almost thirty years ago, I was in a very deep depression. The response I got was, ?You just need to snap out of it.? I said, ?This is not something I want and I don?t know how to make it go away.? For me, depression comes on fast without warning, stays a short time, and then leaves just as quickly. It can stay for a few days, but for the most part, it?s a moment-by-moment thing.

I?m looking forward to any responses.

 

[Undiagnosed]

total reacal this describes me exactley. I have to be doing something almost all the time. I keep involved in creative projects to keep me ocupied. Haveing a creative outlet helps me unwinde.

 

[King_Oni]

Heh... I was just reading my files from my social worker and I adressed this earlier apparently. Having a goal or a project in mind keeps me somewhat out of depression. Guess it's also a thing about keeping active in mind and doing things you like... it serves a lot of purposes. It prevents people from becoming passive.

The downside obviously is, at least in my case, that real life gets in the way, way too often. And then there's financial issues... there's nothing wrong with projects.. there is when the pricetag looks out of your pricerange. Back to a new project.

I actually believe I achieved most when I did pursue projects when I was left alone for months (and had no real outlook to get bothered since I was having therapy like once a month) and or even when I officially was still registered in school and informally dropped out. It's not that I achieve things under pressure because "I have to"... it's not being disturbed on top of being slightly stress free to keep a good mental state of mind and get stuff done.

Right now I'm noticing I'm getting depressed because I'm being withheld of focussing and actually getting comfortable with any projects. It's like I'm being told "No, you are not allowed to achieve anything right now" on a daily basis... for the past year or so.

 

[abinun1987]

I'm pretty depressed right now. I was doing pretty good considering my ex of 5 years broke up with me in October, but lately I've just been a blob. I don't do anything whatsoever. I still go for walks and to the gym to exercise, but that's it. My room is collecting dust like crazy and I spend most of my time sleeping for 10 to 12 hours each day. I hate it because I have very specific goals in mind right now: I need to get my driver's license, I need to move out of my parents' place and I need to apply and go to college. But I just don't have the energy to do so anymore.

At least it's not the suicidal depression I've gotten in the past. Right now I just feel "bleh" rather than "I want to die so badly". The ironic thing is, I'm my own worst enemy when it even comes to suicide... I end up thinking of countless ways I could survive my suicide attempt and it just makes me give up in that regard, thus making me even more depressed. The only reaction I can have to that is to laugh simply because of the macabre absurdity of it.

 

[Undiagnosed]

I can't aford to put money into projects either . I am so excited that I have found a creative outlet that I can also make money on.

 

[Undiagnosed]

I'm pretty depressed right now. I was doing pretty good considering my ex of 5 years broke up with me in October, but lately I've just been a blob. I don't do anything whatsoever. I still go for walks and to the gym to exercise, but that's it. My room is collecting dust like crazy and I spend most of my time sleeping for 10 to 12 hours each day. I hate it because I have very specific goals in mind right now: I need to get my driver's license, I need to move out of my parents' place and I need to apply and go to college. But I just don't have the energy to do so anymore.

At least it's not the suicidal depression I've gotten in the past. Right now I just feel "bleh" rather than "I want to die so badly". The ironic thing is, I'm my own worst enemy when it even comes to suicide... I end up thinking of countless ways I could survive my suicide attempt and it just makes me give up in that regard, thus making me even more depressed. The only reaction I can have to that is to laugh simply because of the macabre absurdity of it.

It's not easy. I beleive depression is the worst condition a person can hve. Sometimes all you can do is hang in there and know a better day is ahead.

 

[total-recoil]

Although depression crippled me in years past, I now have it pretty much under wraps. I just take the special interest side of aspergers and use it to totally occupy my mind. I will spend hours studying electronics and up to 6 - 7 hours doing music (at a time). I confess it may not be healthy but I have so much mental energy I need to direct it into something. Depression tends to strike me now as sudden paranoia (may feel friends talking about me if I'm on a low) or the tantrums (caused by noise, even a dripping tap)

total reacal this describes me exactley. I have to be doing something almost all the time. I keep involved in creative projects to keep me ocupied. Haveing a creative outlet helps me unwinde.

 

[total-recoil]

Animals helped me a lot. I have a special connection with dogs and I think it's developed as I could never connect with people. Having animals depend on you and come to love you makes a person feel needed. I only discovered this aspect of myself about 4 years ago.

I'm pretty depressed right now. I was doing pretty good considering my ex of 5 years broke up with me in October, but lately I've just been a blob. I don't do anything whatsoever. I still go for walks and to the gym to exercise, but that's it. My room is collecting dust like crazy and I spend most of my time sleeping for 10 to 12 hours each day. I hate it because I have very specific goals in mind right now: I need to get my driver's license, I need to move out of my parents' place and I need to apply and go to college. But I just don't have the energy to do so anymore.

At least it's not the suicidal depression I've gotten in the past. Right now I just feel "bleh" rather than "I want to die so badly". The ironic thing is, I'm my own worst enemy when it even comes to suicide... I end up thinking of countless ways I could survive my suicide attempt and it just makes me give up in that regard, thus making me even more depressed. The only reaction I can have to that is to laugh simply because of the macabre absurdity of it.

 

[Aalo]

Some thoughts of why snapping out of it might not even be possible: http://discovermagazine.com/2013/may/13-grandmas-experiences-leave-epigenetic-mark-on-your-genes

"According to the new insights of behavioral epigenetics, traumatic experiences in our past, or in our recent ancestors? past, leave molecular scars adhering to our DNA."
"If the suicide victims had been abused as children, they found, their brains were more methylated."

"Why can?t your friend ?just get over? her upbringing by an angry, distant mother? Why can?t she ?just snap out of it?? The reason may well be due to methyl groups that were added in childhood to genes in her brain, thereby handcuffing her mood to feelings of fear and despair."

Does this rise any thoughts?

I think it's incredibly good that these sort of topics are studied even that some might think that it's unnatural to dip into something so fragile or sacred. Well, that's not all. Epigenetic codes can be altered and medicinal industry is on it already. At this point I'm exited of all possibilities humanity could possibly reach while overriding poor synapses leading to unwanted behavior. Like, obese people could artificially be told that they like sports and healthy eating, self harming people could be told that they can enjoy their lives in that body they do have right now, that substance abusers feel good without etc.
As almost everything in life, It's a bit two edged thing too. At first, I'm always curious for new, and my big influence on this is that I still hope I could have lived a normal childhood with healthy family members and therefore wish these technologies to success, but in turn that life I lived gave me so many advantages if compared to how little other people at my age have seen in their lives, and I'd never want to have a swap on that. Hmh.

 

[Sparticus]

Depression & I are old friends. Sometimes I'll think about the guy friends I have known who died...social problems of being an Aspie...that my family never accepted me & always told me to "change." Then in one year my family suddenly died...my parents & brother all died right after my divorce. They didn't even say "goodbye" "I love you" or "hey we are packing it in."

My whole life everyone told me I was too sensitive...that I had to change or "just snap out of it already." While my favorite brother was the typical ADD poster child...I was the super shy kid. Everyone [adults & older kids] called me my brothers name since he was so outgoing. But as I got into my 20s...something happened. It's as if my condition worsened...

Over the years I've gone into different phases including deep depressions, anxiety etc. I wish people were more empathetic & sensitive.

 

[Aspieistj]

Chicken or egg? I think having AS is enough to make anyone depressed. However, I am a terrible pessimist and also prone to mild anxiety and that is also enough to make me depressed. Does one cause the other? Are there Aspies, (high functioning) who have never been depressed? Or Aspies who are flaming optimists?

 

[Ylva]

Too much optimism is irrational. It would take quite formidable willpower to never be depressed, with the sort of thing we go through.

 

[King_Oni]

Too much optimism is irrational. It would take quite formidable willpower to never be depressed, with the sort of thing we go through.

This... and for some weird reason, people think I'm crazy when I tell them this.

I don't think I'm a full on pessimist... I'm more likely a realist. If being realistic actually messes up so much it looks like pessimism, isn't there something inherently wrong with reality?

It's an interesting notion to think about in a vaccuum (even if it's a mere thought experiment). All things aside, how much of our depressions are caused by ASD, and if they are, what aspect of it causes said depression? Is it the social isolation? Is it the bleak outlook on your future? Is it being misunderstood? Is it something else? is it a combination of factors?

 

[Ylva]

For me, it wasn't the disorder itself, but the feeling inferior to absolutely everyone else.

Of course, when I grew up and ditched that notion, the depression kept coming back. Possibly to do with vitamin D deficiency, for some time, but it's only recently that I've begun to get past the trauma of growing up Aspie. Undiagnosed at that.

 

[King_Oni]

For me, it wasn't the disorder itself, but the feeling inferior to absolutely everyone else.

Of course, when I grew up and ditched that notion, the depression kept coming back. Possibly to do with vitamin D deficiency, for some time, but it's only recently that I've begun to get past the trauma of growing up Aspie. Undiagnosed at that.

I actually think this applies to most of us... feeling inferior... or at least the fallout of feeling as such. Failing at stuff that society deems "normal" and "neccesary".. stuff like school and getting/keeping a job for instance.

The trauma of growing up as an undiagnosed aspie adds to that notion of inferiority I guess...

Interesting point ^^