Hello Peeps Have I been misdiagnosed

[Daniel Dutton]

For me it is interacting with people and making conversation. One thing I have found is a difficulty in finding the right words for a sentences, as in expressing my thoughts.

There are more tests you can try in the games section, what kind of thinker are you. when doing a test it is how you compare to the reference point.

In my signature is one for my test results.

Cant find the games section? Do you have a link Warwick?

 

[Warwick C]

This is a link to it

What Type of Thinker Are You? Quiz | AspiesCentral.com

This is one I have done www.AspergersTestSite.com

 

[Salmongirl17]

Welcome, Daniel!!

 

[Vanilla]

Welcome Daniel

You'll find that having AS is something that you just 'know'. Most people describe that realisation as 'the lightbulb switching on' moment. Whether you choose to believe it or not is another matter, but the more you learn about the facts, and compare notes with others here, the better an understanding you'll have of whether or not you believe you have it.

Reading books is a good start, but I find sometimes simply sharing, and comparing stories here can do wonders. We have many circumstantial questions that we use to compare ourselves with on here, so take a look around; perhaps things will seem familiar here; perhaps they won't. I hope you find your answers soon enough.

 

[rollerskate]

Hello, and welcome.
Aspergers in some people can be identified straight away. I did a questionnaire and a one hour face to face session that also included a diagnosis. It was the best day of my life. For my son it made no difference (he was diagnosed at 19).

Because of your age it is probably more evident than you realise. You have just learnt to manage yourself through life the best way you can without strategies on how to deal and cope with situations that create the anxiety and social situations.

As for the childhood stuff you have read in books, remember that every childhood is different. The books are a general guide not a specific fact. When I was a child I was always on the roof of the family house, up a tree or sitting in my closet to have space and be away from family. I needed space and to be left alone, but in my day Aspergers didn't exist. My son on the other hand just wanted to play and did not like school. He was fascinated with cars and placing them in colour coded order. He is now into Lego and builds Star Wars models.

We are all different and none of us fit into the same mould even with an Aspergers diagnosis.

Wow you just described some of the differences between myself and my son, LOL!

Welcome to the forum. I don't normally post on these things because I kind of suck at introductions, but I can relate to the initial doubts. Just keep reading... It will eventually either hit you on the head like a ton of bricks or you'll just continue to be all meh probably not about it...

 

[Ereth]

I can't say much that hasn't already been said, but welcome to AspiesCentral, Daniel.

 

[I am that which I am]

Hello,

Social anxiety is often a part of autism, but autism tends to be more complex and as everyone has mentioned it is different everyone. I am less socially anxious than you, for example. For myself I need more time to construct my thoughts and answers in social situations, hate phones, prefer written communication as I can say what I mean more clearly. I am actually a bit of a slow responder on internet messengers and tend to write a lot. I tend to not like being touched by strangers and my comfort with physical affection is related to how well I know/like the person. I tend to avoid eye contact but try to focus on something close to the person's face so that they do not notice as much. I have been practicing being normal since I was a child so some things are not there or as obvious anymore. I am hypersensitive to light and sound, and do not taste normally. I have odd habits (eat dry pasta, tip toe around the house) but those are harder to notice. You may not do the hand flapping or related repetitive behaviours, I don't. If you are the type to be self aware and have insight than it is easier to tell how you relate to any particular disorder but if you do not have much insight into yourself than it will take more time and effort. The fact that you keep reading about the disorder seems related to obsessions, which is a particular aspie trait. I also get more upset for longer periods of time than others for little things. I am trying DBT for that, which is helpful. It is a bit odd though that you did not show many of the signs in your childhood. Some doctors will also do background research with your parents. You could ask them about your childhood and compare to what you are reading. It is good to make sure, but having a diagnosis can at least gear you towards the right programs (which are slim for adults with ASD in most countries). They might also help you find a job that will tailor work closer to your needs or (strongly) encourage a current employer to let you work at home if you are more comfortable and productive.

 

[Daniel Dutton]

Welcome, Daniel!!

Thank you salmongirl

 

[Daniel Dutton]

Hello,

Social anxiety is often a part of autism, but autism tends to be more complex and as everyone has mentioned it is different everyone. I am less socially anxious than you, for example. For myself I need more time to construct my thoughts and answers in social situations, hate phones, prefer written communication as I can say what I mean more clearly. I am actually a bit of a slow responder on internet messengers and tend to write a lot. I tend to not like being touched by strangers and my comfort with physical affection is related to how well I know/like the person. I tend to avoid eye contact but try to focus on something close to the person's face so that they do not notice as much. I have been practicing being normal since I was a child so some things are not there or as obvious anymore. I am hypersensitive to light and sound, and do not taste normally. I have odd habits (eat dry pasta, tip toe around the house) but those are harder to notice. You may not do the hand flapping or related repetitive behaviours, I don't. If you are the type to be self aware and have insight than it is easier to tell how you relate to any particular disorder but if you do not have much insight into yourself than it will take more time and effort. The fact that you keep reading about the disorder seems related to obsessions, which is a particular aspie trait. I also get more upset for longer periods of time than others for little things. I am trying DBT for that, which is helpful. It is a bit odd though that you did not show many of the signs in your childhood. Some doctors will also do background research with your parents. You could ask them about your childhood and compare to what you are reading. It is good to make sure, but having a diagnosis can at least gear you towards the right programs (which are slim for adults with ASD in most countries). They might also help you find a job that will tailor work closer to your needs or (strongly) encourage a current employer to let you work at home if you are more comfortable and productive.

Hi there. It's the 'different for everyone' bit I'm a bit uneasy with. I understand the whole spectrum thing, I get that, but I'm not comfortable with any diagnosis where you can pick and choose from so many pieces. In my mind, this simply widens the scope for a misdiagnosis to be made. Iv read a lot of books. When I told my father he said yes I can see that diagnosis is possibly true. On the other hand, my siblings said 'no way'. As a child I just considered myself to be very shy and particularly over-sensitive. I had friends. It was only in early adolescence that I started to feel a bit different and struggle around people. It was all so sudden. All of a sudden I couldn't make friends easily. I couldn't keep relationships going. I simply do not connect or gel with anybody. And dear god, emotions wise, 99% of the time I'm completely disconnected. Iv sat working in an office for four years and never really knew anybody. I don't fit. The social anxiety aspect was never always there. It's developed over time simply from working with people who have been hostile to me. If the ados test confirms things I will probably only seek a second diagnosis. Ironically I would like to sit down and chat with someone who has been diagnosed just so I can question them stupid in person.

 

[Daniel Dutton]

Wow you just described some of the differences between myself and my son, LOL!

Welcome to the forum. I don't normally post on these things because I kind of suck at introductions, but I can relate to the initial doubts. Just keep reading... It will eventually either hit you on the head like a ton of bricks or you'll just continue to be all meh probably not about it...

Thanks roller skate. I could do with an aspergery (made up word) neighbour so I could pop round theirs and give them a good interrogation sometime.

 

[Daniel Dutton]

Welcome!!! Vanilla said it right, "You'll find that having AS is something that you just 'know'." I always knew I was different, but didn't know what to call it until diagnosed. Now that I know, I can say, "Cool." I've adjusted my life accordingly and things are much better. I'm still Aspie, but I've made the NT world fit better for me.

Hi Sportster. Thanks for the input. I know something is wrong yes. I just don't know what it is. I think again it comes down to the whole spectrum thing with me. Find enough traits in yourself and it's very easy to get pigeon holed. Something most definitely isn't right, that's for sure though. I could possibly sum it up by saying I don't fit in, I don't gel with people, I find life and most people very boring. Could this not just be chronic depression though. That's my thinking. Anyways.

 

[I am that which I am]

Iv sat working in an office for four years and never really knew anybody. I don't fit. The social anxiety aspect was never always there. It's developed over time simply from working with people who have been hostile to me. If the ados test confirms things I will probably only seek a second diagnosis.

A different kind of job could help. I also found it harder after my very very stranger high school popularity bout to make friends. I have to work harder to get out there, and am just starting that. I am going to groups that interest me in particular, there are some people that will post meet ups (groups that do a particular activity), and I run a rooming house (but live a double life).

I also get your point about different for everyone bit, it is not as straight forward.

Has anyone in your family been diagnosed? I am not officially diagnosed but my son is, my only cousin on my father's side is, and my father despite no diagnosis (was not tested back than) is clearly on the spectrum. Where are you from (Sweden or Netherlands)? Maybe there is someone in your area on here? There are also Asperger support groups or groups that just get together for fun in some areas, but these may be harder to find. I learned by going to another completely unrelated group that several adult aspies get together and play video games on Mondays.

A second diagnosis is not uncommon either. I officially have anxiety and depression, but the doctors admitted I am hard to diagnose (I am that strange).

 

[Daniel Dutton]

A different kind of job could help. I also found it harder after my very very stranger high school popularity bout to make friends. I have to work harder to get out there, and am just starting that. I am going to groups that interest me in particular, there are some people that will post meet ups (groups that do a particular activity), and I run a rooming house (but live a double life).

I also get your point about different for everyone bit, it is not as straight forward.

Has anyone in your family been diagnosed? I am not officially diagnosed but my son is, my only cousin on my father's side is, and my father despite no diagnosis (was not tested back than) is clearly on the spectrum. Where are you from (Sweden or Netherlands)? Maybe there is someone in your area on here? There are also Asperger support groups or groups that just get together for fun in some areas, but these may be harder to find. I learned by going to another completely unrelated group that several adult aspies get together and play video games on Mondays.

A second diagnosis is not uncommon either. I officially have anxiety and depression, but the doctors admitted I am hard to diagnose (I am that strange).

No, no one at all either in immediate or extended family has been diagnosed. I'm actually from the U.K. Good ol sunny Blackpool. I might give a support group a try. You seem to have it well sussed and are doing the right things. I've simply no lust for life. Not in a suicidal way. Just in a 'is this it' kinda way. No urge to be with people. So flat that it's impossible to hide from people. I guess all I can do is just keep researching. I've another session with the specialist soon so another chance to question some more.

 

[rollerskate]

Hello,

Social anxiety is often a part of autism, but autism tends to be more complex and as everyone has mentioned it is different everyone. I am less socially anxious than you, for example. For myself I need more time to construct my thoughts and answers in social situations, hate phones, prefer written communication as I can say what I mean more clearly. I am actually a bit of a slow responder on internet messengers and tend to write a lot. I tend to not like being touched by strangers and my comfort with physical affection is related to how well I know/like the person. I tend to avoid eye contact but try to focus on something close to the person's face so that they do not notice as much. I have been practicing being normal since I was a child so some things are not there or as obvious anymore. I am hypersensitive to light and sound, and do not taste normally. I have odd habits (eat dry pasta, tip toe around the house) but those are harder to notice. You may not do the hand flapping or related repetitive behaviours, I don't. If you are the type to be self aware and have insight than it is easier to tell how you relate to any particular disorder but if you do not have much insight into yourself than it will take more time and effort. The fact that you keep reading about the disorder seems related to obsessions, which is a particular aspie trait. I also get more upset for longer periods of time than others for little things. I am trying DBT for that, which is helpful. It is a bit odd though that you did not show many of the signs in your childhood. Some doctors will also do background research with your parents. You could ask them about your childhood and compare to what you are reading. It is good to make sure, but having a diagnosis can at least gear you towards the right programs (which are slim for adults with ASD in most countries). They might also help you find a job that will tailor work closer to your needs or (strongly) encourage a current employer to let you work at home if you are more comfortable and productive.

Wow, I didn't even realize the tip toeing was Aspie related. I do the same thing. And the really interesting part is as a toddler I tip toed instead of walking... My family had to force me to walk normally. Even just walking around normally, I still curl my toes in my shoes.

 

[rollerskate]

Daniel, just a guess really but I know I had the same issues at least.... And I'm betting a lot do just because Aspies tend to be so exacting and specific. It's hard to grasp that a disorder could be so varied in the way people act. What has helped me come to terms with it is understanding what underlying issues CAUSE that behavior, and I'm pretty sure that's what they're looking for when they diagnose as well. We all act differently but there is a common thread running through it all in that we all are reacting to the same kind of differences in how we process things. Personality and experience fills in the rest as far as actual outward behavior goes. For example, everyone experiences sensory overload. But the way we react to it is varied. I don't know about others but I wasn't even able to identify sensory overload even when I read about it until I watched a simulation. Before that, I described it as "I get confused, irritated, and overwhelmed easily and it's hard for me to focus or think sometimes." I didn't even really acknowledge it was environmental, though I did know I did better when in a quiet and peaceful environment. And it made me feel so so so stupid that I could not handle basic stuff others could like working in a fast food restaurant as a teen because I just got so confused and overwhelmed. When I finally saw a simulation video, it clicked. I was like OMG that is EXACTLY what it feels like for me...

That's why I recommend looking into personal media by Aspies instead of trying to rely on the text book stuff. A lot if it if read from an NT diagnostic perspective won't ring any bells because even though you're living it, you've never been given the language to describe it with or the understanding of what is actually happening to you, so to you it's just as I put it once upon a time "this big nameless beast that stalks me around in my brain that makes me stupid for no logical reason."

 

[I am that which I am]

No, no one at all either in immediate or extended family has been diagnosed. I'm actually from the U.K. Good ol sunny Blackpool. I might give a support group a try. You seem to have it well sussed and are doing the right things. I've simply no lust for life. Not in a suicidal way. Just in a 'is this it' kinda way. No urge to be with people. So flat that it's impossible to hide from people. I guess all I can do is just keep researching. I've another session with the specialist soon so another chance to question some more. What are the main 'biggy' traits that you have?

I did not know the UK had free health care. I see I also am bored with life in a way and just do not enjoy it as I think I am supposed to. It could be the start of depression. I had a rough childhood so I always had these anxiety and depression issues.

Big traits, um... social anxiety and have to think to look people in the eye. I like to fallow a fairly strict schedule, I get up have breakfast with youtube, go to work, eat lunch with a show or film (used to be exactly 30mins of one), work some more, come home look up things of interest or spend time on the internet or study, watch another 30mins of a show or film during supper, more studying or browsing, bed. I listen to music when working and hate random order. I hate when my plans for the day change, it really throws me off. I worked in construction outside (and still do sometimes) to pay for school and I always hated rainy days or when it started to rain. I have this semblance of awkwardness around me. I become obsessed with certain subjects or things, that is a biggie for many aspies. As a child I loved architecture, electronics, legos, space/astronomy. I got really into computers later on, writing and playing musical instruments. I always had a good ear for music and loved music, this has been constant. Now I am more obsessed with theater and films, neuroscience, psychology, physics, mathematics, astronomy. I watch a number of documentaries. I had communication/language deficiencies as a child (until 4/5), my parents nearly put me in a special group for that but them I (somehow) had no problem when the time came. I am gifted/cursed (depends how you see it) with an excellent memory. I know my cousin who had an official diagnosis and was more severe would memorize (perfectly) bus routes and schedules when he was young. I will tend to rant (very one sided conversation) about a particular topic of interest to people and try to be careful with that. Sometimes people do not get it or are not interested and I had to learn to see those signs. I like research conferences because I can rant all I want lol. Many aspies are eccentric or quirky. They seem odd or different to other people but often do not realize it. I tip toe around the house, eat dry pasta, have odd tastes in music and films, and probably more that no one tells me about. I used to be a bit OCD about some things, like making sure I do not forget my keys several times, cleanliness, checking the oven/stove, certain way to do things. I can also be absent minded and forget I am cooking something until it starts burning. I tried to tone that down since I think that I was influenced to be OCD about those things by my mother who I think must have OCD. She has been moving for 2 years and has to pack and clean things in a particular way!

 

[I am that which I am]

Wow, I didn't even realize the tip toeing was Aspie related. I do the same thing. And the really interesting part is as a toddler I tip toed instead of walking... My family had to force me to walk normally. Even just walking around normally, I still curl my toes in my shoes.

Hello,

I am not sure if it is an aspie thing, it may be a quirk (which is aspie). I do it because it makes less noise, I am very stealthy .

 

[Daniel Dutton]

That's why I recommend looking into personal media by Aspies instead of trying to rely on the text book stuff. A lot if it if read from an NT diagnostic perspective won't ring any bells because even though you're living it, you've never been given the language to describe it with or the understanding of what is actually happening to you, so to you it's just as I put it once upon a time "this big nameless beast that stalks me around in my brain that makes me stupid for no logical reason."

Wow. Great reply rollerskate. My specialist said stop reading professional books about it and read the personal account's of people. I went all the way through Tony Attwood's book, 'The Complete Guide to Asperger's Syndrome' and I still wasn't sure it was me. Christopher Gilbert has a good book and he devised his own set of diagnostic criteria for it. It's completely different from the one usually used and I identified more with that.

I guess all i can do is wait for the ADOS test they will be administering soon. It has to be administered by someone who is well trained to spot the signs so i will just go in, be completely myself, and see how it goes. I was coping fine I think. My only problem is people. At the moment they are my obstacle in life. If I could sort that then I could cope and get by. Most programming jobs I go in I work harder than anyone else. Not because I want to show people up, but because I don't want social chit-chat. I just want to work and be left alone. It never happens though. I quickly get singled out as being different and then it's all eyes are on me which I hate. Some form of verbal abuse usually follows. I went into programming because it's what I did in my spare time and people always say oh it's a great job for the introverted. You can just sit in a corner and get on with it. They lied ha ha.

 

[Daniel Dutton]

You're very welcome. I tend to get verbose sometimes, but that's another "Aspie thing." Have you completed any of the online assessments? They're an excellent tool. They can act as a compass to point you in the right direction regarding an official diagnosis if they indicate you may be an Aspie. Most of us here have done that. Some, after completing the assessments, have pursued an "official" diagnosis.

Hello again. Yes I have done a few quizzes. Ironically at the height of my problems about eight years back I actually considered if I might have Asperger's after stumbling upon it on the web when looking for answers. I sort of discounted it at the time. Most quiz scores I get do say 'hell fella your in Aspie territory'. I think a support group might be the way to go here. Meet people with the condition and see if they are like me.

 

[rollerskate]

Wow. Great reply rollerskate. My specialist said stop reading professional books about it and read the personal account's of people. I went all the way through Tony Attwood's book, 'The Complete Guide to Asperger's Syndrome' and I still wasn't sure it was me. Christopher Gilbert has a good book and he devised his own set of diagnostic criteria for it. It's completely different from the one usually used and I identified more with that.

I guess all i can do is wait for the ADOS test they will be administering soon. It has to be administered by someone who is well trained to spot the signs so i will just go in, be completely myself, and see how it goes. I was coping fine I think. My only problem is people. At the moment they are my obstacle in life. If I could sort that then I could cope and get by. Most programming jobs I go in I work harder than anyone else. Not because I want to show people up, but because I don't want social chit-chat. I just want to work and be left alone. It never happens though. I quickly get singled out as being different and then it's all eyes are on me which I hate. Some form of verbal abuse usually follows. I went into programming because it's what I did in my spare time and people always say oh it's a great job for the introverted. You can just sit in a corner and get on with it. They lied ha ha.

I'm the same way. Just let me focus on my work and leave me alone. Have you considered doing your work from home before? There are home based programming jobs... BTW, kudos for programming. I hate coding so I really admire those that can stick with it. Making something that works can be downright infuriating. My logic never seems to sync up with the machine's logic, LOL.