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My final thread.

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Marcus

Marcus

Star Wars enthusiast
When I started on this forum I had very high hopes, if I had known then about the downward spiral my opinion would take on this place, I never would have made an account at all.

I used to love this forum, I truly did. It was something brand new for me and a realm of infinite possibilities. Man, was I ignorant.

It's no secret that I have taken a few hiatuses from this place, but every time I come back that depressed feeling just gets worse. I now think of this site as I do social media, which to me is a waste of time. I don't belong on any of those platforms and I certainly no longer feel like I belong on here.

It depresses me to know that my efforts at trying to reach out to people and all those threads and blogs I posted have really meant nothing. I should have expected that though.

I don't even know why I'm bothering to write a thread about this, I guarantee you most people won't bother to read it, and if they do they'll think "oh, he's just in another mood again."

I'm sure someone is thinking "why doesn't he just shut up and leave for good already if he feels this way?"

Well, I'm on my way out the door. I cannot handle the meltdowns and the assault of depression anymore that this place causes me.
 
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Marcus said:
When I started on this forum I had very high hopes, if I had known then about the downward spiral my opinion would take on this place, I never would have made an account at all.

I used to love this forum, I truly did. It was something brand new for me and a realm of infinite possibilities. Man, was I ignorant.

It's no secret that I have taken a few hiatuses from this place, but every time I come back that depressed feeling just gets worse. I now think of this site as I do social media, which to me is a waste of time. I don't belong on any of those platforms and I certainly no longer feel like I belong on here.

It depresses me to know that my efforts at trying to reach out to people and all those threads and blogs I posted have really meant nothing. I should have expected that though.

I don't even know why I'm bothering to write a thread about this, I guarantee you most people won't bother to read it, and if they do they'll think "oh, he's just in another mood again."

I'm sure someone is thinking "why doesn't he just shut up and leave for good already if he feels this way?"

Well, I'm on my way out the door. I cannot handle the meltdowns and the assault of depression anymore that this place causes me.
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Its your life dude... I have to say that yes it is sort of like social media for people like us to talk about stuff that affects us... Some of its funny, some of its serious, some of it is stupid, and some of it is horribly sad...

I wish I could picture what you were expecting??? These people have put up with some of the stupidest stuff coming from me and have never berated me, shunned me, or been mean to me... Yes they may be brutally honest, but that is more what I need than anything.

I truly haven't seen a downward spiral here. Even if there was... EVERYTHING has ebb and flow, just like you and me, and everyone else.

I do read your posts. I also see your often feel lonely and misunderstood... Welcome to the world of ASD buddy. Dude I have been misunderstood since day one and I haven't really had an easy life on any level, but I don't expect LIFE to cater to me, or make me happy. I am in charge of finding the state of happy and NO ONE can find it for me... No one...

My hopes are that you are trying to spur some people into posting things... Maybe I'm wrong. But on here you probably wont get the feed back you will from NT type social media, not even close.

Here's why... PEOPLE LIKE US respect other peoples opinions, and I respect yours, even though I don't understand it. Plus most of us aren't real big on confrontation. I hope you change your mind and hang out some more, if not I wish you all the best in seeking what you need to find.
 
Hope you just want us to tell you not to go, because I have found several of your post interesting. Like the multitask thing you recently posted. My problems with that issue are different and it was good to find out how the same problem isn't always the same problem. There are a few people on this forum I have chose to ignore because they tended to say things that would kinda upset me. Also I avoid the politics stuff. Most of the people on this forum have been invaluable to me in getting through the day. I need to read as much as I can from others with similar problems or I can get horribly lonely and depressed and end up feeling like the stupidest person on earth. So, your post are always appreciated by me, I need to read as much of this sorta thing as I can find and this is the only forum I know that I can comfortable do that. If you leave you will be missed. Sorry that there have been problems for you, I really hope you can find a way around them. Sure it may be partly selfish of me to want everyone on here to stay, but we all need each other.
 
Oh wow, Marcus, sorry you feel that way!

I have felt like you on here, when I first came. At first, I thought it was great, and then, I felt I was being ganged up on and decided that perhaps I have had my "time" on here and should leave and so, off I went and for a few months, it seemed that my thoughts were accurate, as not a single member contacted me to ask if everything was ok and so, I actually did forget about it and then, out of the blue, a female aspie got in touch and said she had been hesistant to contact me, but decided to, because she really missed me and hopes I would come back and that, she got me, because she has felt the same on occasion and so, I came back and what I saw was most who was on here, suddenly seemed to disappear and the ones on here now, and so, I am finding it a loving place to be and sorry that you feel the opposite.

In truth, not seen many of your threads, so I do sincerely hope I am not guilty of upsetting you and if I am, I really am truly sorry about that :(
 
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To bad you feel that way. I like it here. I think it's wonderful that there is a forum out there like this for people with Autism. It's great to share our stories with 1 another of life with Autism.
 
I used to feel the same on other forums, but it seems I'm banned for life from most forums anyway because I tend to make enemies of the Mods for my outspoken views, and particularly on UK based forums, the fact I don't like the Daily Mail because of their views on the unemployed, people on benefits, and the disabled, so they hate me because I'm disabled, unemployed AND on benefits :(
 
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That might have been the problem Marcus. You approached your early time here with high expectations, immediate friendship with people.
It's not always that way, and it may take months to years to develop friendships and connections here.
It's definitely not going to happen simply because you want it to. You can't make people like you in short order.
Lower your expectations and take a deep breath, friendships and connections are much like real life and take lots of time in getting to know people.
I for one, would like to see you contribute here. Along the way, you might over time make some new connections with people.
 
Mia said:
That might have been the problem Marcus. You approached your early time here with high expectations, immediate friendship with people.
It's not always that way, and it may take months to years to develop friendships and connections here.
It's definitely not going to happen simply because you want it to. You can't make people like you in short order.
Lower your expectations and take a deep breath, friendships and connections are much like real life and take lots of time in getting to know people.
I for one, would like to see you contribute here. Along the way, you might over time make some new connections with people.
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I often can get stuck in a way of thinking.

So I try and think

If I think the opposite that can also be true.
 
Fridgemagnetman said:
If I think the opposite that can also be true.
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It can sometimes be, when I came here three years go I had few expectations. Was looking for information on autism. It didn't occur to me that I would stay and that the people I connected with would become friends.
Members helped a great deal and had a personal understanding of it, and it wasn't a clinical DSM diagnosis solely. Found them well-informed and interesting and kind. More so than other sites I had been a member of. Think I stayed, because people helped me and as a result I felt I should do the same.
 
Mia said:
It can sometimes be, when I came here three years go I had few expectations. Was looking for information on autism. It didn't occur to me that I would stay and that the people I connected with would become friends.
Members helped a great deal and had a personal understanding of it, and it wasn't a clinical DSM diagnosis solely. Found them well-informed and interesting and kind. More so than other sites I had been a member of. Think I stayed, because people helped me and as a result I felt I should do the same.
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When I came here nearly 2 years ago, I just randomly found it from a Google search for Autism specific forums.
 
Sorry you want to leave! Clearly people appreciate having you around but if you feel like leaving is best then do what you need to do
 
I guarantee you most people won't bother to read it, and if they do they'll think "oh, he's just in another mood again."

I'm sure someone is thinking "why doesn't he just shut up and leave for good already if he feels this way?"


Self talk can be so destructive.

Anyway this sounds like Borderline Personality disorder. (not splits) A nasty co morbid.The assumptions we make seem logical and sometimes they are. but roughly 80% of the time it's different from what we think it is.

If you want a solution to help manage this problem here are 2.

1. a DBT workbook which you can probably find online in pdf format somewhere.

2.

Good luck
 
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Marcus said:
I guarantee you most people won't bother to read it,
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Looks like a lot of people "bothered" to read it bro...

Seriously... What transpired? Did you just get bored? Did you not find the content you were searching for?
Your post is just so abrupt (not a real good word), with no warning maybe... I know what I'm trying to say, but I cant get the words right... Sorry.
 
This is sad. He apparently believes no one cares yet it's clear to me that many do. Perhaps he had a set idea about what would transpire if people cared and things did not go as envisioned and he was unable to recognize that there are other ways to show caring? I hate to see anyone leave under these circumstances. It's hard enough to just make it in this world without there being stress with your own group. Kind of like working in a setting where you feel more grief from your co-workers than you do from the customers.
 
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I am sad you are leaving, too and I feel like Suzanne hoping it was not my struggles that made you think we are all depressed...........I met so many nice people on here and people who are aspie successes.....I hope you are one also one day marcus! We do care, but a lot of us really really really suck at connecting. That is why we are here.
 
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