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My Wife wants me to prove I will defend her!

thejuice said:
Not if they act the fool and feel entitled to use the boyfriend/husband as a personal unpaid bodyguard, that's just toxic.
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Husbands and wives should always have each other's back. Parents should always protect their children. "Personal unpaid bodyguard" is very unrelated to what is supposed to happen in marriages. As others have commented, the OP needs to talk to his wife about what she wants and what he can reasonably provide to her.
 
lunarious said:
1. God made women and men different. God is a He, in Islam. Mother Nature is innocent. That's how i feel.
2. Instinct are dangerous. A female when young might become pregnant while being careless. ... So it is about controlling people's instincts, ... also being manipulative. But not to be evil.
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Did it ever occur to you that the man who impregnates a female has responsibility for his act? Why are you blaming women for men's inability to control their sexual urges? That concept is foreign to and rejected by the modern world.
 
Mary Terry said:
Did it ever occur to you that the man who impregnates a female has responsibility for his act? Why are you blaming women for men's inability to control their sexual urges? That concept is foreign to and rejected by the modern world.
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Males and females are equal in Gods eyes.

Except they are different. Modest women are more natural, unlike modest men. ... e.g. females cover their breast unlike men do, on a beach.

I'd Love a spirit of a female whom happens to be modest. Unlike an unmodest female i'd Love her body. Loving the body is finite.

Christians call it Sex/Body Love or Spiritual Love. I will discuss this in Religious Forum here:

lunarious

Thread 'Loving the flesh and Loving the spirit'

Mary Terry said:
Did it ever occur to you that the man who impregnates a female has responsibility for his act? Why are you blaming women for men's inability to control their sexual urges? That concept is foreign to and rejected by the modern world.
Click to expand...
Males and females are equal in Gods eyes.

Except they are different. Modest women are more natural, unlike modest men. ... e.g. females cover their breast unlike men do, on a beach.

I'd Love a spirit of a female whom happens to be modest. Unlike an unmodest female i'd Love her body. Loving the body is finite.

Christians call it Sex/Body Love or...
 
Mary Terry said:
Yes, that's why it is so offensive that men try to force women to hide their bodies from men. It is a "very old, very nasty way to manipulate [women]."
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This seems to be escalating fast. Where did the force part come from? What exactly does it mean?
Is it manipulative equivocation such as "stating a preference is violence" logic?

Or are we talking about actual (highly illegal) violence?
Or credible threats of violence ("force" can be used for this, but it's a different meaning of the same word).
Or is it the force in question "I will divorce you if you go out dressed like that"

A simple scenario (IRL I'd expect more steps, and some negotiation at each step

1. A man's wife goes out to clubs with her GF's once a week, dressed in lets say "club style".
The man asks that she dress less provocatively when she goes out. She says no, and does it anyway.
He than initiates a divorce.

Nobody was forced to do anything. Of course. This is simply a difference on preferences.

2. The same thing, but if's a BF/GF living in the same dwelling.
So the guy moves out.

3. Same, but GF/BF and separate dwellings.
So they never meet again.

In which case(s) (if any) is the man behaving badly?
Why is it wrong to have that preference, and act on it?

Feel free to claim the women dress for themselves /lol.
But the facts are in: they compete with each other. For attention.

The closest thing to human mating protocols is found in birds.
 
Hypnalis said:
This seems to be escalating fast. Where did the force part come from? What exactly does it mean?
Is it manipulative equivocation such as "stating a preference is violence" logic?

Or are we talking about actual (highly illegal) violence?
Or credible threats of violence ("force" can be used for this, but it's a different meaning of the same word).
Or is it the force in question "I will divorce you if you go out dressed like that"

A simple scenario (IRL I'd expect more steps, and some negotiation at each step

1. A man's wife goes out to clubs with her GF's once a week, dressed in lets say "club style".
The man asks that she dress less provocatively when she goes out. She says no, and does it anyway.
He than initiates a divorce.

Nobody was forced to do anything. Of course. This is simply a difference on preferences.

2. The same thing, but if's a BF/GF living in the same dwelling.
So the guy moves out.

3. Same, but GF/BF and separate dwellings.
So they never meet again.

In which case(s) (if any) is the man behaving badly?
Why is it wrong to have that preference, and act on it?

Feel free to claim the women dress for themselves /lol.
But the facts are in: they compete with each other. For attention.

The closest thing to human mating protocols is found in birds.
Click to expand...

Look at the Muslim faith and then get back to us about forcing women to dress in a certain way.
 
Mary Terry said:
Look at the Muslim faith and then get back to us about forcing women to dress in a certain way.
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If you want to attack the men of a particular religion, say so at the start.

Personally I accept that other cultures and/or religions do things in different ways. As did our ancestors.

Which is interesting for someone who believes in the stronger forms of inherited/generational guilt.
There are few (if any) people alive who didn't have male ancestors who preferred monogamy (or had harems with guards to ensure their wives were faithful).
 
Hypnalis said:
Personally I accept that other cultures and/or religions do things in different ways. As did our ancestors.
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Nothing wrong with doing things in different ways, but I think it's important to put the foot down and say no when for example people start treating women like cattle and pretend it's normal and perfectly fine. 🤔 We must have some limits to what we accept, can't blindly accept everything.
 
Forest Cat said:
Nothing wrong with doing things in different ways, but I think it's important to put the foot down and say no when for example people start treating women like cattle and pretend it's normal and perfectly fine. 🤔 We must have some limits to what we accept, can't blindly accept everything.
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If that was what was being proposed, perhaps. But as written it's a Straw Man wrapped in weasel words.

BTW don't think I don't understand your perspective. What I don't like is that your position isn't being discussed at all.

The standard procedure is to prove your opponents' position is objectively wrong first, then figure out how to categorize them.

Take a look at my post #45 if this is about women going out clothed in a way that's designed to attract the male gaze.
And BTW, hasn't the mere existence of the male gaze been declared heretical? If so, dressing to attract it is axiomatically not just exploitative, but also evil in itself.

If you don't feel this is about women dressing to attract attention from men, you'll need to specify the scenario.

Modern men don't generally object too strongly to the kind of clothing that's e.g. worn to work in offices, even though many aspects of it would have been considered revealing and provocative within the same culture a few generations ago.
 
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Hypnalis said:
If you want to attack the men of a particular religion, say so at the start.

Personally I accept that other cultures and/or religions do things in different ways. As did our ancestors.

Which is interesting for someone who believes in the stronger forms of inherited/generational guilt.
There are few (if any) people alive who didn't have male ancestors who preferred monogamy (or had harems with guards to ensure their wives were faithful).
Click to expand...

You need to look at cultures worldwide before you post something.
 
Mary Terry said:
You need to look at cultures worldwide before you post something.
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This is a stretch /lol.

Let's try it ....

"You don't have a medical degree, yet you dare to breath, eat, and drink."
"You don't have a PhD in Literature, yet you read classical literature."
I'm getting a bit nervous using this keyboard, since I couldn't design or build one. What if I make a lethal error?
 
HOFJanitor said:
There have been instances in the past where she will engage in a heated argument with other people. I tend to take a passive and listening role. I try to take a peacemaker role but she says that i am not defending here enough.

Top be honest I am quite stumped. I know I am not a coward and would defend her of course! She is neurotypical btw! Any help would be appreciated!

TY
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REMINDER:
The topic proposed by OP is * What to do when his wife is arguing with people.*
Further replies to this thread should address that topic.
 
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