Not having a future

[SimonSays]

I have Only seen your avatar and it shows incredible talent I would love to see more.

I don't have my portfolio with me, but I do have a photo of one I can show you.

My avatar was made using coloured pencils. This is made using gel ink pens...

 

[Gift2humanity]

What is stopping you from continuing to make these beautiful ass pieces? I know we have lockdown but they will give you something to do and they seem to benefit you so much. I am glad you like Tolle.

 

[Gift2humanity]

I don't have my portfolio with me, but I do have a photo of one I can show you.

My avatar was made using coloured pencils. This is made with ink...

View attachment 66111 View attachment 66111

That is absolutely indescribably beautiful. Even if you only have a black pen you can create beauty in amidst this lockdown.

 

[SimonSays]

What is stopping you from continuing to make these beautiful ass pieces? I know we have lockdown but they will give you something to do and they seem to benefit you so much. I am glad you like Tolle.

I need a table and comfortable chair. Solitude. Materials. I don't have access to any of those right now.

 

[Gift2humanity]

I suppose that is true, after a fashion. The original intention is there. I don't like how things have turned out. The corruption and cruelty in the Catholic church (priests and nuns in Ireland especially) is difficult to stomach. It is too rich, too bloated, nothing like the original church.

The words of Lao Tzu are a good choice. Thank you. But to be honest, it is not different ideas that are needed. It is the silence. It is peace of mind. It is letting go. It is acts of loving kindness. Service. Connection.
Meditation centres me in the present, but I am living in a hostile environment. Dealing with constant anxiety and stress for months. It manifests in ways that mess with me. I could do with a break.

Yes I agree a hostile environment is not good. Estate agents are operating, perhaps you can find a place to live alone.

 

[Gift2humanity]

I need a table and comfortable chair. Solitude. Materials. I don't have access to any of those right now.

I am so sorry to hear that. Do you have your own room where you could maybe get a secondhand little desk and chair? Sorry if this sounds trite. Edited to add as for the solitude can you put some headphones on with some relaxing music to drown out the things and people that are interrupting your solitude to enable you to at least attempt some art.?

 

[SimonSays]

I am so sorry to hear that. Do you have your own room where you could maybe get a secondhand little desk and chair?

I do have my own room but it's too small for furniture. Jus enough for a single bed and small wardrobe.

 

[Gift2humanity]

I do have my own room but it's too small for furniture. Jus enough for a single bed and small wardrobe.

I am sorry to hear that. One option is to move to your own place. House moves are allowed during the pandemic, you might want to check this However somebody near me has very recently sold during this current lockdown.
Another alternative is to sit cross-legged on your floor buy a board, Put it on your bed and draw that way.
You could use the board as a flat surface and sitting cross-legged must be comfortable if you are used to meditating. I hope this is useful.

 

[SimonSays]

as for the solitude can you put some headphones on with some relaxing music to drown out the things and people that are interrupting your solitude to enable you to at least attempt some art.?

Oh I do that all the time. Right now my art is writing.

sit cross-legged on your floor buy a board, Put it on your bed and draw that way.
You could use the board as a flat surface and sitting cross-legged must be comfortable if you are used to meditating.

Thank you. Making Mandalas is one of those things that can't be compromised. It's ok. I would need to be feeling settled, stable, secure, safe (why only 'S' words lol) first. Silent solitude, often with earplugs too. Hand movements need to be so tiny sometimes. I will create them again one day. I wish I could show you some of the later ones. Even better than that one IMHO.

 

[Au Naturel]

 

[SimonSays]

sitting cross-legged must be comfortable if you are used to meditating.

I never sit cross-legged. Circulation issues made it an uncomfortable practice. Meditation is never about how one sits anyway, although there are certainly beliefs about it. For some, if they are too comfortable they can fall asleep. That's why the monks learn to sit (some older ones might still nod off a bit though). One monastic practice is to surprise the meditator by whacking them on the back with bamboo. I'm sure this encourages wakefulness, and is supposed to test their ability to stay present and focussed. In meditation groups I've been in, I always sit on a chair. I haven't fallen asleep yet.

 

[Gift2humanity]

It’s g

Oh I do that all the time. Right now my art is writing.

Thank you. Making Mandalas is one of those things that can't be compromised. It's ok. I would need to be feeling settled, stable, secure, safe (why only 'S' words lol) first. Silent solitude, often with earplugs too. Hand movements need to be so tiny sometimes. I will create them again one day.m I wish I could show you some of the later ones. Even better than that one IMHO.

Good that your art is writing. I’ve enjoyed reading your posts. It’s something beneficial in this current time. The most sense
I Once met about meditation practice where the meditators a house with a stick. I look forward to seeing more of your mandalas in time.