Seen as a joke !

[FilterFreq]

It reminds of reality TV when they put in an autistic guy to be thrown to the wolves. They treat him as some kind of cult legend but really they're laughing at him not with him.

I know it's not all sunshine and rainbows, but that's kind of endearing. I try to embrace it, honestly.

I have the same relationship with people, online and off, and sort of always have. Everyone has a ridiculous quote or thing I've done to remind me about, and I've honestly started seeing this as a sign of genuine friendship and understanding. Because to them, it's something so significant that they actually remembered (months, years or decades) later, and that's pretty powerful. How could I even invoke that by accident? That alone is like a superpower -- even if I'm the butt of the joke (and that's kind of the point anyway).

I try to think about it from their perspective and then I just want to hug them.

 

[thejuice]

This particular case was a reality show where the other contestants ostracised, ridiculed and made innuendos about a guy way out of his depth, while at the same time making him about to be an ironic 'cringey' legend. It made me feel ill.

This was before the show had 3 deaths associated with it, including it's domestically abusive presenter. Jaw droppingly, the teflon show is still on the air to this day, gobbled up by Fiat 500 Twitter.

The producers became all self conscious and preachy about "being kind", because the network got scared they were going to lose its cash cow IP. (The same network that had already lost a chat show due to a similar tragedy. They would bring on society's underclass to humiliate them.)

The show revelled in toxic behaviour, indulged manufactured 'drama' and psychologically manipulated and abused it's young contestants to the point of break down and threw them under the bus when they acted out. No aftercare, just newly found notoriety and tabloid cannon fodder.

By pointing the finger at the public and media it was successfully able to deflect blame and attention from their show's scandalous and fatal premise. The "Be kind" campaign was total survivor guilt. Gross.

 

[Judge]

It reminds of reality TV when they put in an autistic guy to be thrown to the wolves. They treat him as some kind of cult legend but really they're laughing at him not with him.

Sadly there's a bit of truth to this in the most literal sense. That said, I'd also have to point out that in terms of any "laughing" that "Big Brother" contestant Ian Terry had the last laugh, outplaying them all to win. - No joke about that.

Kudos as well to Britini D'Angelo, who also was an autistic participant in "Big Brother".

Big Brother: All-Stars Cast Members Criticized After Mocking Ian Terry's Autism - E! Online

Big Brother Season 23 Star Britini D’Angelo Speaks About Her Autism

 

[thejuice]

I expect there might be a lot more to the Ian Terry thing, in the clip i see a lot of ignorance and over-valuing of their feelings. Some people also have no filter. It pales in comparison to the nasty bullying on UK shows.

If thats all that was said, in private, then it would be equally bad media witch hunting of the woke variety, with everyone lining up to pile on.

But yes, the clip is dissapointing.

 

[thejuice]

Oh theres another clip (broken link) that has more blatant bullying described, well done for the other contestants sticking up for him!

 

[thejuice]

"Memphis used the term "red rum," to describe Ian in the house, a line from The Shining."
What a degrading innuendo.

 

[Jonn]

Does anyone ever feel like people see you as some kind of joke?

Yes.
I suspect a lot has to do with executive dysfunction, lack of Theory of Mind, and general social clumsiness.
Being overly honest doesn't help, either.
And I have noticed that many on the spectrum have a poor understanding of "Context", as I did when I was younger.

 

[Jonn]

My "mind blindness" will not understand the situation sometimes and I might take something seriously when it was meant to be a joke, or worse, I will think it is a joke when it was meant to be serious.

Do you see this as examples of not properly understanding context?

 

[thejuice]

Yes.
I suspect a lot has to do with executive dysfunction, lack of Theory of Mind, and general social clumsiness.
Being overly honest doesn't help, either.
And I have noticed that many on the spectrum have a poor understanding of "Context", as I did when I was younger.

I think people see me on the level of Keith in the UK Office. In a dvd extras interview, Ricky Gervais pondered if the actor who played Keith knew he was funny. Duh! He was the audience's favourite. How disrespectful to say that, no filter. Maybe a bit of jealousy to be outshone by the undercard. Or maybe he's just not that clever and, I speculate, relied heavily on Stephen Merchant's editorialising and story telling. Funny once in the Office, but only because David Brent is just an exaggeration of his delusional self, but more sympathetic, likeable and not just the arrogant, nasty imbecile bit.

 

[thejuice]

And I have noticed that many on the spectrum have a poor understanding of "Context", as I did when I was younger.

Gonna need some context on that one!

 

[Neonatal RRT]

Do you see this as examples of not properly understanding context?

These examples, yes.

This is one of the reasons why I keep saying on the forums, in multiple posts and threads, that context and perspective are so important. If you read any peer-reviewed, scientific paper, it is explained in the "methods" section. What were the exact conditions? The results of that experiment only hold true under those specific conditions. If you change the conditions, expect different results. This is why at the end of the "discussion" section of the scientific paper they will say, "More study is needed.", inviting other scientists to run similar, but not the same experiments to see if the truth holds up. "Truth" and "facts" are conditional/situational. People who do not understand this, may have a distrust in science, especially when the media prematurely picks up on a single study and headlines it with "Scientists say,...." then 5, 10, 20 years later, the people find out that what was said may have not held up to other studies. "Doctors don't know anything." Well, they actually do. They are understanding context and perspective a lot better than you in this case.

The political battles between the far left and right. "Truths" and "facts" are quite different depending upon one's perspective and context. If you are blinded by your cognitive biases and information sources, you will never appreciate context and perspective, with both sides convinced that "I am right and you are wrong." This is how fights start.

I had to learn all of this late in life and became a lot more aware of my "mind blindness" after my diagnosis. Sometimes keeping your mouth shut is better. Sometimes fact checking is better. Asking clarifying questions regarding context and perspective is better. Am I perfect at it? No. Do I catch myself vocalizing my own cognitive biases out loud? Yes.

It's part of the reason why I ramble on like this, as it is important to me to make as accurate statements as I can. Do I still get things wrong? Yes. Hopefully, others will ask me more clarifying questions and alert me to other facts, and we can learn something along the way.

 

[thejuice]

The political battles between the far left and right. "Truths" and "facts" are quite different depending upon one's perspective and context. If you are blinded by your cognitive biases and information sources, you will never appreciate context and perspective, with both sides convinced that "I am right and you are wrong." This is how fights start.

True and I'll also add, if I may, that the stupid are full of conviction. When you have a battle of personal identity between two belligerent, polar opposite ideologues, you'd better get out the way of the smash up because it's the unstoppable force versus the immovable object!

 

[Neonatal RRT]

The folks who are wrapped up in their "personal identity" and "cultural bias" are quite a handful to deal with. I am not sure if it is a personality disorder, an insecurity that they must be "right", or a lack of intellect, or some combination.

 

[Jonn]

Sometimes keeping your mouth shut is better.

Spoiler

Impossible!

Magnificent post, as per usual.

 

[Jonn]

The folks who are wrapped up in their "personal identity" and "cultural bias" are quite a handful to deal with. I am not sure if it is a personality disorder, an insecurity that they must be "right", or a lack of intellect, or some combination.

All of that but also, sanctimony, self-righteousness, and virtue-signalling are literally addictive, surely.
Dopamine, serotonin, whatever, floods the body, and it feels so good to have the moral condescending high ground.

Humans...
What can you do? <shrug>

 

[thejuice]

All of that but also, sanctimony, self-righteousness, and virtue-signalling are literally addictive, surely.
Dopamine, serotonin, whatever, floods the body, and it feels so good to have the moral condescending high ground.

Humans...
What can you do? <shrug>

Yes exactly.

*points finger* "Somebody do something!! No not me!!"

Its the online way, and im very guilty of it. If you want to never be criticised, stay at home, do nothing and find fault with everyone else.

 

[jsilver256]

I'm getting it even last night. It makes me paranoid, what are they saying about me behind my back?

how much time do you spend thinking about other people (other than wondering what they think of you)? how much time do you remember the faux pas or whatever weird slip-up they said?

YMMV, but I spend almost zero time thinking of what other people said/did in passing

and so I just assume everyone's the same way. worst case they just go "wut" and then go on with the rest of their day.

 

[thejuice]

im used to people talking behind my back I caught people doing it when i was an adolescant/ young adult a few times. Id walk out of room and then wait and listen. Or when id come back id pause to eavesdrop before entering the room. And sure enough, they were gossiping/ insulting me. That was when i was smoking weed so my paranoia was sky high. (is it paranoia when i was right lol) So i just expect it. Funny at that age the brain cares more about fitting in than your dignity lol.

I had an anxiety attack about the recent comment on way home from the situation, like a full body wave. Then i wrote about it, which easied it. Im not thinking about it too much now, but its certainly on my mind when I see them. It was just a reminder im different. Ive lost interest in getting to know them. My standard defense mechanism, shut out, drop.

 

[Jonn]

YMMV, but I spend almost zero time thinking of what other people said/did in passing

Spoiler

 

[Jonn]

(is it paranoia when i was right lol)

"It isn't paranoia when it is really happening."