Self-diagnosed Aspies

[kg4fxg]

Well,

I did those AQ tests on-line for Aspergers. The first time I scored a 49, the second I can get it down to a 43. But in all honesty I don't think I can go below a 40 and even at 30 I am suspect for Aspergers. My wife having taught kids with it some time ago did her Specialist (After a Masters degree) focused in Autism. She called and spoke to the head of the department at the University for me.

I did other tests on-line like Schizophrenia but I only get something like an 8% and so I know I don't fit into that nor Bi-Polar or ADHD. I really don't understand those either. What I did was Google Aspergers and try to find like diagnosis and take those tests or try to rule them out.

I scored extremely low on the Bi-Polar but in the past a doctor said that was what I had. I disagree but I am no expert.

I am 49 but I try to think of my odd past. I would not talk to people when I was young. Say kindergarten and my parents took me to a Psychologist and we built models together, sort of odd but a way to get me to speak. But this was back like 1968?

I never fit in at school. First grade was a disaster and I would attempt to run away and walk home even hiding from the police.

I have a lot of quirks. I hate change, I hate to change my routine. I do it but say going to the dentist before work is not my routine and I hate it. Everything has to be planned.

I am sort of fixed on things. I do ham radio or focus on my classical guitar or philosophy books. But only one can be dominate. I am either all about any one of those things but no balance.

I don't see myself as moody. I like to be alone and eat lunch alone. Walking into the lunchroom at work with people makes me real nervous. Generally I would say my life might appear boring or a flat line. But I like it.

I have a thing about my car. It is just a Corolla but it has to be clean. I am the only one in it, you have to click your heels together as I go nuts if there is dirt on the floor. Just think of a nice car that is fully detailed all the time.

But you are correct, I have learn how to adapt. If I know what I know at 49 at say 25 life would have been so much easier. I say what I think which often lands me in trouble. I don't do well at office politics. I am resented for my credentials and abilities because I am too good or produce more work than others.

I talk sort of monotone. Not much expression. I know something is not right, but then in my own way I really feel I am right and the rest of the world is wrong. Don't we all.

I am starting to read books on Aspergers because I need to learn some coping skills if this is truly what I am. I don't want it to end my career. I posted another post under career and education that explains more what I am up against.

Thanks for being so kind here.
Bill

 

[Kelly]

I am 49 but I try to think of my odd past. I would not talk to people when I was young. Say kindergarten and my parents took me to a Psychologist and we built models together, sort of odd but a way to get me to speak. But this was back like 1968?

I never fit in at school. First grade was a disaster and I would attempt to run away and walk home even hiding from the police.

I remember when I was a kid the school had someone come in to have 'special' lessons with me, my parents had no idea, it was all to do with not speaking, I didn't speak to the woman who came until she managed to get it out of me that I had a pet budgie. She brought a book about budgies the next time and it fascinated me and I became obsessed with it and I started talking to her non stop about budgie's, she stopped seeing me soon after.

I have a lot of quirks. I hate change, I hate to change my routine. I do it but say going to the dentist before work is not my routine and I hate it. Everything has to be planned.

I have the same problem with change, when I was younger it upset me more but as I've gotten older and just had to deal with change it has less of an impact. To the extent that like yourself if something small is changed such as an appointment at a time when I would normally be having lunch then rather then me being flat out angry / upset I'm really annoyed (but keep a lid on it) and feel on edge for the rest of the day. I'm a planner as well, I like to know exactly what we are doing, as a child I would make schedules of what I was going to do, I once spent 6 hours making a schedule of what TV programmes I'd be watching at the weekend. Now I do it all in my head, for example next week my daughter has another hospital appointment, it's annoyed me because that is when I'd planned to do the fortnightly shop, as a result I'm having to do it tomorrow which has really annoyed me but I just have to get on with it.

Anyway next tuesday I have it all planned out in my head, I'll get up earlier then usual, my husband will have his bath whilst I have breakfast with our daughter, then I'll have a shower whilst he has breakfast. He'll amuse our daughter whilst I take the dog out for a walk, when I get back we'll wait for my mother in law to arrive (she's driving us there as my husband has been unwell recently), I will check the time about a thousand times and get increasingly frustrated by my mother in law's lateness. As soon as she gets here we'll leave, we'll get stuck in traffic which will bring me out in a sweat because I'll freak out thinking we'll be late, I will check the time every minute, double check it on my phone and the car clock just incase one is wrong. When we finally get to the hospital we'll take about 10 minutes to park, we'll half run to the clinic to have her cannula fitted. My daughter will inevitably have a hysterical screaming fit / cry despite being explained to several times what they are doing and why as well as being given entonox. I will back off because the noise will hurt my ears, my husband may or may not faint again, the nurses will give me nasty looks for not comforting my daughter or being seemingly affected by my husband's blackout (this is all based on last week's experience). I will snap back after closing down for a few seconds because of the quick pace of everything changing, awkwardly hug my daughter, tell her everything will be fine and then we'll go get my husband and go off to the nuclear medicine dept. Then we will repeat it all but it will probably be less traumatic, we'll go have a drink at the cafe, take daughter to build a bear where I will stand awkwardly in the corner whilst my daughter and husband rush around playing with everything....well yeah it goes on and on but that is a summary of how I have it planned out in my head, there are minute details but this post is getting too long too fast already lol.

I don't see myself as moody. I like to be alone and eat lunch alone. Walking into the lunchroom at work with people makes me real nervous. Generally I would say my life might appear boring or a flat line. But I like it.

But you are correct, I have learn how to adapt. If I know what I know at 49 at say 25 life would have been so much easier. I say what I think which often lands me in trouble. I don't do well at office politics. I am resented for my credentials and abilities because I am too good or produce more work than others.

I always hated lunch at work, in one place I worked I use to hide in the bathroom to avoid going to the cafeteria, but people eventually found out and it became a bit of a joke (teasing involved). Other places I worked were just as awkward but I had nowhere to hide so just sat out of the way, kept my head down and ate as fast as I could so I could get back to the office. I was also too efficient at every job, at one pharmaceutical company (I was an accounts clerk) my boss often sent me home at lunctime because I finished all my work in the morning...but then came the exploitation where I was basically doing 2 people's jobs as well as covering reception (one good thing came of that, I became more confident on the phone) that happened in every job I've had (the exploitation).

I am starting to read books on Aspergers because I need to learn some coping skills if this is truly what I am. I don't want it to end my career. I posted another post under career and education that explains more what I am up against.

I've found that just reading about Asperger's and reading (on another site) other people's experience's, thoughts, etc etc has helped me a great deal, finally understanding what's happening when I become upset and irritated by certain smells, noises etc. I can stop beating myself up about having what are essentially tantrums over the silliest things and because I understand myself more I have learnt to step away most of the time before an upsetting situation turns into (I think the correct term is) a meltdown. I feel less silly about telling my husband that I don't want to do something or go somewhere because it's too noisy or awkward for me (like taking our daughter swimming, I can't take the noise and smell in the waiting room) I don't worry so much that I sound like a complaining child. I finally understand why I become so exhausted from socialising, why I find it so awkward and say the wrong thing (like telling someone I'm okay but freaking out a little when asked the general "how are you?" question). Why I become so obsessed with something that it's all I think about and have to be reminded to eat, sleep, wash, communicate. Why I flap my arms and do my hand patterns and shout things out. Most of all it's been a huge relief to finally realise that it's not just me, that I'm not just weird and I'm not alone.

 

[NeverEnder]

I remember when I was a kid the school had someone come in to have 'special' lessons with me, my parents had no idea, it was all to do with not speaking, I didn't speak to the woman who came until she managed to get it out of me that I had a pet budgie. She brought a book about budgies the next time and it fascinated me and I became obsessed with it and I started talking to her non stop about budgie's, she stopped seeing me soon after.



I have the same problem with change, when I was younger it upset me more but as I've gotten older and just had to deal with change it has less of an impact. To the extent that like yourself if something small is changed such as an appointment at a time when I would normally be having lunch then rather then me being flat out angry / upset I'm really annoyed (but keep a lid on it) and feel on edge for the rest of the day. I'm a planner as well, I like to know exactly what we are doing, as a child I would make schedules of what I was going to do, I once spent 6 hours making a schedule of what TV programmes I'd be watching at the weekend. Now I do it all in my head, for example next week my daughter has another hospital appointment, it's annoyed me because that is when I'd planned to do the fortnightly shop, as a result I'm having to do it tomorrow which has really annoyed me but I just have to get on with it.

Anyway next tuesday I have it all planned out in my head, I'll get up earlier then usual, my husband will have his bath whilst I have breakfast with our daughter, then I'll have a shower whilst he has breakfast. He'll amuse our daughter whilst I take the dog out for a walk, when I get back we'll wait for my mother in law to arrive (she's driving us there as my husband has been unwell recently), I will check the time about a thousand times and get increasingly frustrated by my mother in law's lateness. As soon as she gets here we'll leave, we'll get stuck in traffic which will bring me out in a sweat because I'll freak out thinking we'll be late, I will check the time every minute, double check it on my phone and the car clock just incase one is wrong. When we finally get to the hospital we'll take about 10 minutes to park, we'll half run to the clinic to have her cannula fitted. My daughter will inevitably have a hysterical screaming fit / cry despite being explained to several times what they are doing and why as well as being given entonox. I will back off because the noise will hurt my ears, my husband may or may not faint again, the nurses will give me nasty looks for not comforting my daughter or being seemingly affected by my husband's blackout (this is all based on last week's experience). I will snap back after closing down for a few seconds because of the quick pace of everything changing, awkwardly hug my daughter, tell her everything will be fine and then we'll go get my husband and go off to the nuclear medicine dept. Then we will repeat it all but it will probably be less traumatic, we'll go have a drink at the cafe, take daughter to build a bear where I will stand awkwardly in the corner whilst my daughter and husband rush around playing with everything....well yeah it goes on and on but that is a summary of how I have it planned out in my head, there are minute details but this post is getting too long too fast already lol.




I always hated lunch at work, in one place I worked I use to hide in the bathroom to avoid going to the cafeteria, but people eventually found out and it became a bit of a joke (teasing involved). Other places I worked were just as awkward but I had nowhere to hide so just sat out of the way, kept my head down and ate as fast as I could so I could get back to the office. I was also too efficient at every job, at one pharmaceutical company (I was an accounts clerk) my boss often sent me home at lunctime because I finished all my work in the morning...but then came the exploitation where I was basically doing 2 people's jobs as well as covering reception (one good thing came of that, I became more confident on the phone) that happened in every job I've had (the exploitation).


I've found that just reading about Asperger's and reading (on another site) other people's experience's, thoughts, etc etc has helped me a great deal, finally understanding what's happening when I become upset and irritated by certain smells, noises etc. I can stop beating myself up about having what are essentially tantrums over the silliest things and because I understand myself more I have learnt to step away most of the time before an upsetting situation turns into (I think the correct term is) a meltdown. I feel less silly about telling my husband that I don't want to do something or go somewhere because it's too noisy or awkward for me (like taking our daughter swimming, I can't take the noise and smell in the waiting room) I don't worry so much that I sound like a complaining child. I finally understand why I become so exhausted from socialising, why I find it so awkward and say the wrong thing (like telling someone I'm okay but freaking out a little when asked the general "how are you?" question). Why I become so obsessed with something that it's all I think about and have to be reminded to eat, sleep, wash, communicate. Why I flap my arms and do my hand patterns and shout things out. Most of all it's been a huge relief to finally realise that it's not just me, that I'm not just weird and I'm not alone.

I relate personally (including lunch at work, such trouble for me) to what you have written.

 

[kg4fxg]

Thanks NeverEnder and AZ83. I don't feel so alone. I certainly appreciate the support and I glad to lunch at work is not high on anyones list.

Funny, they all now I don't eat in our Cafe. I was in there to get my lunch out of the refrigerator and one of the guys jokingly said "Hey you can't sit and eat with us, only popular people can". Flash backs of High School. There is the usual group that gathers to eat and watch the big screen TV.

 

[Flinty]

About 12 years ago, I was diagnosed with schizophrenia. At the time, it made sense. But there was something bothering me about it - specifically my language delay between 2 and 4. Schizophrenia doesn't cause that, because schizophrenia doesn't occur before age five.

So what that likely means is that I actually have high-functioning autism. My psychiatrist isn't making a big deal of it because he doesn't think it a big deal, but I'm much more relaxed now.

 

[epath13]

About 12 years ago, I was diagnosed with schizophrenia. At the time, it made sense. But there was something bothering me about it - specifically my language delay between 2 and 4. Schizophrenia doesn't cause that, because schizophrenia doesn't occur before age five.

So what that likely means is that I actually have high-functioning autism. My psychiatrist isn't making a big deal of it because he doesn't think it a big deal, but I'm much more relaxed now.

I don't know if you want to discuss it here and if you don't it's fine. Schizophrenia diagnosis is pretty serious and I always thought they didn't just give it, it's condition that required a lot of investigation. May I ask why were you diagnosed? When I was younger I researched lots of disorders trying to figure out what's going on with my brain until I settled on that it was something in the way my brain was "buillt". But anyway, in my teens I thought I had schizophrenia, but my therapist at the time said that it didn't appear to be the case.

 

[breadfin]

Hi AZ83,

I realize as you said that your daughter has some severe medical issues- and you want to focus on these- but getting her help now for her mental difficulties is extremely important. It might take you years to get a diagnosed as adults are much more difficult to pinpoint- especially being a woman on the spectrum- but if your daughter gets a psychologist now, it might only take a year, at most, to get her a diagnosis, and then she would get help for her difficulties right away. It sucks to high heavens to have to label a young child, but that's what you need to do to get her services- and not sure where you're located, but waiting lists can be really LONG. So don't wait.

And while they are considering your daughter, they'll be asking you about your family history and background- so you will get an informal diagnosis as well- and from what you learn about your daughter, you can then figure out if you in fact have the same difficulties/symptoms. And then once she is a dignosed, you can then get yourself diagnosed and have her history as back-up for yours.

It's just really important that your daughter get help now because the help she will get will help her cope with her problems and then will allow her to grow up to be a strong and autonomous individual. And then you could learn about yourself through your daughter. As adults, we have a lot of baggage to deal with and diagnosis and coping with the symptoms can take years and years. But a child can get the help early and then be able to deal with it much sooner and effectively so that they don't then have to have so many difficulties later on. She may have a hard time when she is older with certain noises, etc. but she will have learned how to cope with these and any new difficulties.

If your daughter has to deal with health issues and with other mental difficulties, that's a lot to take in. So you could start helping her now. Get some books on what you think you and she might have (books on children) and start working with her. For instance, if she has difficulty with noises, get a book on sensory issues for children and start working on brushing exercises or on introducing her to noises, etc.

Just my two cents. My boys have helped me better understand myself and in this way I have used their coping mechanisms to help myself.

And one hint to all. Set a goal- one goal- make it simple and once you've accomplished it, reward yourself. But make sure you start small- take little steps, and then slowly make it more difficult. If you don't succeed that's ok- just make it a bit easier- don't pile on too much at once- just little steps. If you are afraid of the library- start taking a weekly visit. Then progressively start upping the challenge- like touch the books- just touch them. Then open one and read it- just for a few seconds. Build yourself up little by little until you can successfully grab a book and check it out- this could take months to accomplish- that's ok- that's good. And each time you reach your goal- make sure to reward yourself.

N

 

[Kelly]

Hi breadfin, sorry for taking so long to respond to your post, half term always throws me off because I have to entertain the little one all the time (well more then usual).

Anyway I really do want to start the diagnosis process with her asap but my husband is totally against it. He is completely supportive when it comes to me and agrees that it sounds as if Asperger's is what I have but he refuses to admit our daughter has it too and thinks I'm reading too much into things. So we agreed a while ago that I will get a diagnosis first and then we will get her one, I think he's just worried about her being labeled, teased, etc etc from a young age. I've explained to him several times that we don't HAVE to tell anybody, we can simply get the diagnosis and when / if school becomes a real problem we can tell them so they can help her in whatever way they can.

She may however get diagnosed quite soon because she's being referred to the children's mental health team after her last hospital appointment. She had to have a cannula fitted so that they could inject her with a radioactive substance for a DMSA scan to check her kidney function / how bad the scarring is. Anyway something that should have taken 30/40 minutes in total to do took over 3 hours because she was so hysterical. She was given entonox gas as well as numbing cream but still managed to scream and shout so much that extra nurses kept coming in to see what was happening. Afterwards the head of the department took us to one side and told us to get her referred to a psychiatrist because that level of fear and hysteria is not normal, particularly because the bulk of the screaming / drama happened when they wanted to remove the cannula. I already know why it happened, she was a little upset about having the cannula fitted but she was so off her face on the gas and watching a dvd she didn't notice and afterwards she was laughing and joking, it was only when we got to the nuclear medicine department and she realised it was the same nurse as last time (who'd screwed it up and injected the stuff into her tissue instead of her vein causing her immense pain) and that's when the crying really started.

My daughter already has difficulties, she has sensory issues but she has already learned how to cope with alot of them to an extent, with certain fabrics she is like me and will not wear them (so of course we now avoid buying any clothes, bedding etc that will irritate her). If I put the vacuum cleaner or hairdryer on she will just hide in her room or close as many doors between her and the noise as possible, she avoids drying her hands in public bathrooms with the dryers, she uses tissue instead.

The biggest problem I can see happening is the social aspect, at the moment she is extremely popular but as all of them are getting older her way of playing is becoming more and more of an annoyance to the other kids. She often falls out with her friends because they won't play the way she wants to or she says they are being mean to her when all that's happened is that they want to play a different game to what she suggests. It was worst when she first started pre-school / full time school, if a child accidentally bumped into her she would get very upset and tell the teacher they were picking on her. I once witnessed her 'kick off' because one of her friends tapped her on the back, she stated crying and ran over to me and said they had punched her in the back, it took me 10 minutes to calm her down and get her to understand that they tapped her to get her attention and that it wasn't malicious. Or another little incident was when they were having an easter hat parade, she was standing in line ready to go on the catwalk and the boy behind her lifted his hand up to scratch his head, accidentally knocked her hat a little and she turned and screamed at him not to touch her and that he'd ruined everything. So yeah her over reaction to things may cost her some friendships, she sometimes gets distracted in class by the noise, lights etc and has to start her work all over again, she also like me tends to ramble. The teacher may dictate a story and the kids have to write it out word for word, except she likes to add more, putting her own spin on the story or describing things more or adding extra characters (like her favourite teddies) and most of the time the teacher will let it slide but some teachers have told her off and made her do it all over again. She's taken some things in school so literally she's come home in tears and been inconsolable for hours. Like her year 1 teacher told them about the clothing bin and any items of clothing left laying around would go in that bin...she took it as a literal bin and thought the teacher would be throwing all of the clothes away with the rubbish. As a result she was terrified of taking any of her clothing off at school for fear of it being thrown away (this lasted for a few days before we got it out of her what was upsetting her). Once we went in and the teacher explained that it wasn't an actual rubbish bin just somewhere to put the lost property / clothes left laying on the floor etc she was fine.

That's just a handful of little things that have happened, my husband is in total denial and doesn't want to admit she has problems, but he's not NT himself so to him she is normal if that makes sense? When I point out her obsessions like when she will get stuck on a particular film and watch it over and over again all day for weeks he thinks that's perfectly normal because he did it too as a kid (I have my suspicions that he's on the spectrum too as he has alot of aspie traits). Wheras now that she's being referred he will have to face facts and I will be telling the psychiatrist my suspicions so hopefully this is the start of a diagnosis.

 

[epath13]

@Az83
Your daughter seems to behave a lot like my older son I've been suspecting Asperger's since I found out what it was after my younger son was diagnosed with ASD and after I was diagnosed with Asperger's myself 3 months after him, but psychiatrist didn't see a lot of traits during the evaluation to give a definite diagnosis even though he said that it didn't mean that my son didn't have it, it was just hard to say at that point. The doctor was more leaning towards issues that kids with high intelligence often had but I wasn't really convinced it was just the IQ thing (we don't even know if it's really that high ). but anyway... we'll see what will happen. at school teacher and stuff knows that he might have the condition and they also know he can be a handful sometimes so they try to deal with him accordingly. He might get IEP, he might not, we don't know yet. So at this point he's just an unusual kid, whether he gets diagnosis or not, doesn't seem to be relevant now. We're just taking it one day at a time.

 

[eon]

The person that diagnosed me had doctorates in this field, the converse with colegues and meet with people on the spectrum every day, they do know more than I would even if I read a book mor two.

indeed, they would be required to have a good level of experience meeting with spectrum individuals and helping coach them in order to possess the level of expertise I think necessary to help self DXing individuals understand if they are spectrum individuals or not. now, if they lack this experience, your knowledge is as good as theirs from expert opinion (the opinions OF said experienced folks in their books and writings, video, etc.)- having been in various therapy, psychologist, and doctor review for most of my life I've experienced varying levels of expertise and in most cases find that the professionals in psychology are not all experts on spectrum or even other neurological items like OCD, ADD, bipolar. just because they have a piece of paper saying they know something doesn't mean their opinions and assessments are aligned with the recognized experts of the field. in other words i think experts (like Tony Attwood) are rare and difficult to encounter. That's why knowing who the experts are is so important, so you can guide your particular professionals to collaborate with you using the most current information out there. the point is that self informing is not the same as diagnosing. diagnosis is a societal construct. you can say-- "i feel based on expert opinions that i have a variety of aspie traits" and that it helps you to cope with conflicts or past self-misunderstanding. you can take that exact scenario with someone else's opinion (DX for example) and if it is a well informed opinion through which you also take the initiative to become informed, the same benefits exist for this outcome. So I think the quizzes are nice but there's no substitute, dx or otherwise, for being self informed and acquiring a large amount of knowledge from the known AS experts.

 

[kg4fxg]

I found it interesting that in the book "Look Me In The Eye" John Elder Robinson never got an official diagnosis. I see myself so much in this book like him. Been to doctors over my 49 years and they got it all wrong. And I mean many doctors from age 5 on. I guess I have little faith in that area as incompetency is ramped.

 

[kg4fxg]

BTW - I ordered the book mentioned above. I also learned in "Look Me In The Eye" by John Elder Robison that he was not officially diagnosed.

I just don't believe the doctors and I view many as quacks. I have seen over 10 in my lifetime and even recently they never even brought up Aspergers. How can they know or diagnose you in 10 minutes with no tests? Sorry, my experience has not been good in this area. I would rather rely on the on-line tests than those quacks.

I checked out a doctor that I saw when I was in middle school in the 70's. She has her specialty in Schizophrenia patients. No wonder she thought I had it. But she sees it in everybody. My life parallels that of Robison. I build electronics like he did and I am successful. I don't need a doctor to tell me what I already know.

 

[alien girl]

i was diagnosed by a fellow aspie on the last job i had. he told me i have a closed body language and dont look people in the eye etc. i believed i had asperger right away, because i pace back and forth and flap my fingers since i was six years old, scared of noise, was extermely hyper in my twenties and thirties (too old now...), love animals like crazy, music affects me in a way i can't explain. i won't write all the symptoms i have because i dont want to tire the readers. but i did two aspie tests on the net and both said i'm very likely an aspie.
i will get a diagnose when i save money, which will take a while. my parents have an uncanny ability to not see what they dont want to see, even though my mother said i didnt recognize my father when i was a year old because he was gone for a few days and didnt shave. age seven or eight my mother put on a wig, looked straight at me and talked to me and i didnt know who she was!
so of course i believed it right away. i indentify with so much stuff other aspies write in this forum and on blogs, including rage attacks and just about everything. i fit the creteria too much and there just got to be a reason for it.

 

[kg4fxg]

It is very interesting and AZ83 hit the nail on the head with the round around.

I think the mental health people are quacks. Like I said in another post I have been diagnosed as Schizophrenic, Bi-Polar, and OCD. I started seeing doctors in first grade. Through out school I have on every kind of medication available for those disorders. I did not need to do drugs because I did them legally

In many ways my life is much like John Elder Robison who wrote "Look Me In The Eye". I did not finish school, well, I finished at home. My mother brought my work to school to the teachers and home for me to complete. They did not want me in school. Grades were never a problem it was the social things.

So after reading about 6 books so far it is the only thing that seems to click with me, plus the on-line test are a good confirmation. I fail the on-line test for all my "Official Diagnosis".

Be what it may?

B

 

[imdwonb4u]

I am self diagnosed awaiting my first evaluation late this month...I have lived 48 years, not even hearing of Asperger's Syndrome. That however did not in any way stop my suffering from having Asperger's. We all know the problems that we face in society as a result of this disorder. Well I lived totally oblivious to the fact that I was resposible for the problems that plagued my relationships with everyone, including landlords and bosses..wives, children, siblings..you name it. I placed the blame on "them". Logic and intellect trumped their emotions and illogic everytime, but it was me getting put out of apartments, rejections for non-renewal of leases, isolation for years from family, and so on. Fired from jobs, and none of it due to a drug or alchohol use, physically violent or abusive, none of the usual reasons why a man loses his wife and kids, losses his job, basically fails at life. Add to that an above average intelligence and i was thinking that "God is testing me...I am being groomed for something big.."...what else could I think!? Well finding out about the symptoms of Asperger's and realizing that I "tested positive" in every online test, along with researching the disorder leaves me confident that i have this disorder. I am not the type who claims anything...but I have no choice in this. I have lived the hell of having Asperger's already. I personally am not seeking a dignosis which I understand is the first step in getting disability checks for being unemployable..I work as a sailor, stuck on a ship with the same 45 other people for 4-8 months..getting along is a MUST..but I fail time and time agin. I just go to another ship each time i go out. I never go to the same ship twice. If I run into someone I knew or who knows me its easier because they already know to just leave me alone..so my diagnosis is for the sake of treatment. I wish there were a pill...

 

[Caspar]

I think the mental health people are quacks. Like I said in another post I have been diagnosed as Schizophrenic, Bi-Polar, and OCD. I started seeing doctors in first grade. Through out school I have on every kind of medication available for those disorders. I did not need to do drugs because I did them legally
B

I agree with you that psychology is quack. I mean look at how many times the DSM was changed. Psychologists seem to add, remove, and reclassify disorders every time the DSM gets updated. How can you tell whether someone has a certain disorder? You ask how they 'feel'. Comparing psychology to medicine is like comparing the hard sciences to the 'soft' "sciences." Until neurology is advanced enough so that we can cheaply and efficiently detect these biophysical markers of spectrum disorders such as bipolar and autism, these diagnoses will be iffy.

 

[HelloDizzy]

The process of diagnosis is painstaking and I'm worried I'll be misdiagnosed as Schizoid. Four evaluation hours, wheeee!

 

[Bay]

Kg4fxg, I don't know how old you were when you figured out that you were AS (sorry if I missed it in a previous post), but I wonder if it is harder to diagnose in adults because we have developed so many NT appearing behaviors, simply to survive?

 

[earthsteward70]

When my older son started kindergarten he could already count, and read. I wanted him to be tested up a grade level. That's when I was told by the school that they thought he had Asperger's. I started reading books upon books between then, and when he was diagnosed, and said "That definitely sounds like him to a T and wait, I was like that too as a kid, I'm like that now, that's me too!"
With that said, I haven't gone about getting a diagnosis officially. I'm afraid of putting it on my medical record. Should I be? I don't know. Insurance isn't too open to it, and doctor's really aren't experts on it yet either (that I've experienced). There just needs to be more exposure of it to the world to become familiar with it, IMO.

 

[Jeffmoz]

Hi there,

New here and I know this is an old thread- but want to know if anyones expereince is similar to mine.

Firstly I have to admit that I had never considered previously the possibility I was an Aspie, although ironically my path to self diagnosis might have suggested to others that it was patently obvious. I had recently been feeling increasingly tired and drained by the mid afternoon at work when previously I had not been affected in such a way, as I recently spent a couple of days in another office and didn?t feel tired in the same manner, I began to wonder what was different?

Firstly, the office had recently all been moved round to accommodate new people and new furniture, it is a 1970?s/1980?s office building with fluorescent strip lighting, as a result of the move I am now sat directly under a bank of four fluorescent tubes, a Google search on fluorescent lighting and tiredness brought me to an article on AS. In order (or so I believed at the time) to discount this I did some further research regarding testing for AS which lead me to the ASQ test, which to my surprise I scored 37. As I still considered this a possible anomaly I then did several further tests over the next two days that all seemed to reinforce the results of the first one.

SQ-48
EQ-13
Minds in the eye- 19
Aspie Quiz- I am an Aspie ?Aspie Score-136/200 NT Score-70/200
BAPQ-AUTUSTIC/BAP

123 Aloof
86 Rigid
84 Pragmatic

I know these tests are only indicators, however when I look back to my childhood, I can pinpoint numerous occasions when I showed definite AS traits which at the time, were not recognised as such (I am now in my mid 40?s), when I spoke to my Mum about the possibility and discussed the nature of these incidents from her perspective, her reply was both her and my Dad had always wondered if I was a bit autistic, so none of this came as a big surprise to her!

Because of the nature of what I do and the personality types of a lot of people involved in my industry, while I would love to be officially diagnosed I don't think to would be a good idea and some would try and exploit it as a weakness- while I am now convinced that it is the AS that gives me the unique insights and logic and process driven approach which makes me so successful at what I do.

Regards,

Jeff