Ooh that's a good one @Ken; I answered Mormon missionaries a number of times with a two-hour deep dive into the many intricacies of Roman Catholicism. (Which in the Mormon Church, if what these fellows said was any indication, Catholicism seems to be their idea of what the devil does on Sundays.) Pulled out several doorstop-sized books of the driest possible theology, and a Victorian study bible with massive quantities of annotations, and kept them at bay for two hours- They got out of the yard & never came back. A pity. I never finished about the Avignon exile or the schism of 1054.
I also would come up with various characters to play on the phone when telemarketers would call. There was one voice I'd do-- Julia the Cat Lady who threatened to bring banana bread to people. Especially the Policemen's Benefit stuff--there was a scam going round about that, where they called up people to ask for donations to buy PTSD-suffering policemen more weapons. Well, "Julia" had no money or pistols but she had cats, and bread, and casserole, and lots and lots of lonely old friends on the silver side of sixty-- "And we're all lesbians~" I figured he wouldn't care for that.
The scammer one time asked "is this Julia" and I could hear fear.
Glorious.
Finish your casserole.
I also would come up with various characters to play on the phone when telemarketers would call. There was one voice I'd do-- Julia the Cat Lady who threatened to bring banana bread to people. Especially the Policemen's Benefit stuff--there was a scam going round about that, where they called up people to ask for donations to buy PTSD-suffering policemen more weapons. Well, "Julia" had no money or pistols but she had cats, and bread, and casserole, and lots and lots of lonely old friends on the silver side of sixty-- "And we're all lesbians~" I figured he wouldn't care for that.
The scammer one time asked "is this Julia" and I could hear fear.
Glorious.
Finish your casserole.
