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Zain
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  • I'm glad the "blackpill" is becoming more and more popular. Businessmen and entrepreneurs will see this and view a growing market and then desire to create something, a product, that we can buy to alleviate our suffering. Younger men cannot rely on their community for support.
    tree
    tree
    Being depressed, bitter, and suicidal isn't a new, fresh idea.
    It's non-rational.
    Zain
    Zain
    Those are states of being.
    tree
    tree
    People experiencing those states of being could
    profit by seeing psychotherapy.
    If you didn't experience love between 16-20, you won't experience the full extent of love. As you get older, you get uglier. You lose your youthful features. You get less desirable. So why would it happen that you get into a relationship?
    tree
    tree
    Adequate psychotherapy could be useful in helping a person
    recognize harmful non-rational beliefs they've been employing
    in their every day life.
    T
    thejuice
    What would be fascinating to study would be: what proportion of virgins at age 20 turn out to be virgins at 40.
    T
    thejuice
    Adolescent/ young adult love will probably be way more intense because of higher hormonal influence. Whether that's the "full extent" I don't know. Just different.
    I went out to dinner with my work colleagues for the first time. We enjoyed it. I'm considering getting into drinking and clubbing. I envied my friend that was feeling buzzed. He seemed carefree and excited. I can imagine myself that. in that state, I would be extraverted and bold.
    T
    thejuice
    Yes you will learn a lot. Can I say one more thing? Not saying you will definitely become addicted, but addiction is very insidious. Like the crab that can't tell it's being boiled alive when you heat the water slowly.
    Zain
    Zain
    @thejuice I know. Thing is, I'm biochemically as healthy as can be. I want to live a long life and create a large family. Everything I do is for that so I just look at everything as a tool. I won't develop an emotional attachment to such things if it isn't productive.
    T
    thejuice
    Pathway to hell is paved with good intentions. Good luck.
    A girl openly said she was on her period to me at work. It was quite shocking and unladylike. I don't know if it means anything. Isn't this deeply personal to women?
    tree
    tree
    Or not inquire in the first place regarding a personal decision.
    Zain
    Zain
    No, that's silly.
    tree
    tree
    Silly?
    If you weren't ready to hear a real answer,
    maybe you'd have been better off not asking
    the question.
    A lot of people judge those with high IQs and superior beauty without taking into account the fact that their ancestors worked tirelessly and delicately to create that person.
    I remember coming across a quote saying something like - "The battles you don't fight, you are passing down to your children".
    Zain
    Zain
    @thejuice Walking is good enough. And obviously watching what you eat.
    Yeah. It’s sad. No mobility at all. You can see them panting after a few sentences…
    T
    thejuice
    I've got the exercise part down, it's the eating habit that is a problem . I can't go into detail as it's not safe to share mental health stuff in this forum.
    Obsessive bodybuilders tend to be vulnerable narcissist types. It's like reverse anorexia. They're doing everything to avoid feeling anxiety and shame.
    Zain
    Zain
    @thejuice Fair enough.
    Yeah, it's why so many short guys are into the gym. They think it can compensate for their deficits, especially when it comes to women.
    Two things I'll never finish.. Dostoevsky's Crime and Punishment and Blade runner 2049. Their depictions of loneliness and hopelessness for a male in despair is too apt and so relatable. I ended up sobbing at C&P halfway through and not being able to sleep due to BR2049.
    T
    thejuice
    Ooh I must read them then. I hear crime and punishment is quite the tome! Surprised those books haven't been burnt in the modern day 😔
    Zain
    Zain
    Blade runner is a long movie.
    I've had a weird week. I went from becoming an uncle to being told I have to find a new place to live with my family. My dad is chucking us out. My brother and him had a fight.
    Zain
    Zain
    I found out my dad has been talking a lot of crap about me behind my back. I thought we were cool as we do a lot of stuff together. Turns out he wants me to another pawn! I never have done anything for him though. I always knew he couldn't be trusted and I've never had any respect for him.
    Zain
    Zain
    I'm not naive. What people say to your face, they are saying 100x worse behind your back. It's why I won't trust anyone socially, only my future wife, if I find a girl that can trust me as much as I would trust her.
    T
    thejuice
    As someone who has been chucked out of home twice at your age, you have my sympathy it's a scary time. In hindsight,. It might be a great thing for you.
    The only way to get over trauma is by revenge. This is in our nature. But Jesus teaches differently. I'm struggling to reconcile our nature with something that contradicts it.
    Zain
    Zain
    @Gerontius I don't trust psychologists like that that talk about vague concepts.
    T
    thejuice
    @Zain thats true and also I think people behaved better in a tight knit community when there is more responsibility for your actions, real repurcussions and reputation was everything.
    In our virtual world there is the barking through the gate phenomenon and a huge audience of people we wouldnt chose to hang out with IRL, so it brings a different, more brutal dynamic.
    T
    thejuice
    If youre not able to let go then the next best thing is to be better and more successful than them. Its a way to convert a negative, stuck energy into a positive forward, unstoppable momentum. Some sports stars have used this mentality to achieve greatness, it might not be cuddly but it can work, with a risk of burn out. Horses for courses. You can achieve greatness with a self compassion mindset too.
    I just had my weekly football game today. It was very enjoyable, although it's hard to communicate with my acquaintances due to their level of English.
    After, we sometimes take a group photo... I hate having my picture taken. I don't even think I can smile correctly.. best I just keep a straight face in photos from now on unless it is genuine. I can't fake anything. I look unnerving.
    honeytoast
    honeytoast
    Could also add in that if you don't like taking photos and are displaying body language that shows discomfort, naturally, you're not going to have a good photo of yourself. (Went over the character limit so apologies for DP)
    Zain
    Zain
    True. It reminds me of how I perceive my own voice on a recording. We're just naturally not meant to ever see ourselves this way.
    Tony Ramirez
    Tony Ramirez
    I been taking group photos more now I agree it feels weird and I look terrible in them like an outsider
    I hate thinking that there are people living life on easy mode (good career, born into wealth or a good family, experienced/experiencing romance) that are involved in hobbies that I participate in. To get to a certain level, I'd have to put in considerably more effort, alone. It's a constant reminder of how unfair life is.
    Reading the dictionary is so much fun.. it is crazy that all we read and everything we hear and say can be found in this one book. It's a shame that I'm too low class to use the cooler and complex vocabulary.
    tlc
    tlc
    I would do that. I always wondered what determined which words got a picture description. Only 1 or 2 words per page were so lucky.
    UberScout
    UberScout
    How clandestine...
    A lady that was alone initiated a conversation with me at Church. Perhaps I'm not as unappealing as I think I am. We had a good conversation, lots of laughter. I looked at her and saw she was good-looking and so I wanted to get to know her, make her laugh, share personal things, etc. Everything was very authentic.
    Zain
    Zain
    I also had dinner with my pastor and his family. It was the first time ever having dinner over at an acquaintance's house. We had a discussion on theology and my desire to be baptised.
    UberScout
    UberScout
    I was Saved on Easter Sunday. It was an exhilarating experience. Baptism followed a week after. Something like that anyway.
    Zain
    Zain
    My baptism won't be happening for a while.
    I hate how people assume that I'm a Muslim based on my appearance and name. Even though I'm very pale/light-skinned, some people jump off of that, but when people learn my name, people think it's certain. I'm considering changing my name to a more Christian/European one. I kinda hate my name to be honest.
    Zain
    Zain
    I’m not. My family is. According to Islam, I should be beheaded, so I like to keep it private.
    I don’t want people to assume it.
    tree
    tree
    That sounds like a very awkward and uncomfortable situation.
    Zain
    Zain
    @tree It is. I don't like deceiving people. At the same time, I care for the souls of my family so I have to play this carefully.
    Is there anyone here with 120+ IQ on here? How many outcomes can you process at one time?
    Outdated
    Outdated
    Quite a few of us have an IQ of much higher than 120. Your second question lacks any context an doesn't make sense.
    Zain
    Zain
    @Outdated Like, when you're presented with a problem and you want to get to a solution and there are multiple solutions available, are you able to process multiple pathways to multiple solutions at once? Or do you go from one to another? Sort of like creating and following multiple flowcharts at once. You'd have to be able to predict and take into account the necessary variables too
    Outdated
    Outdated
    To me it is all fluid. Not pathways but scales of probability that to a lot of people could look a bit like weather forecasts. I have no idea how much I can do at once because it always seemed that the busier I am the better I can perform. I used to be a Production Manager for print companies and it was something I excelled at.
    I think my piano tutor ghosted me. Lol. Can’t help but laugh at things like this now. People can’t bear to be with me for an hour a week whilst being paid to.
    Raggamuffin
    Raggamuffin
    Think of it as a reflection on them as a person, and don't twist it into an attack on yourself. But give it time, there might be a genuine reason for their lack of response. If not, and they continue to ghost you; then it's unprofessional, and you deserve better in a tutor.
    I played football again with my workmates. That connection I felt with them by bonding through an activity is something I cannot get from normal conversation. I feel that that is what is normal. It makes me think of my place and the effect I have in normal conversation.
    Zain
    Zain
    It'd be like being that one player on the pitch that does not display any passion, excitement or joy whilst playing, not cooperating or playing with the team. Or playing with a different strategy in mind and causing disorder. It's jarring.
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