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Everybody I know has a life except for myself

Hey dude, let us know how you are doing. If you are ready to detox? Realise that alcohol does exacerbates depressive feelings and this is where we get stuck. Maybe a antidepressant would be better then you can wean yourself off it. Feel leaving your family was really tough. It took all you had to leave that. Depression may have followed behind this. In no way am l criticizing you. We do what we have to do. We hope you can just try for a healthier choice.☺☺☺
 
KagamineLen said:
Or maybe I should seek out some AA telemeetings for the time being. I can’t seem to stop drinking on my own, and the nonstop stream of booze is only making my general anxiety a lot worse.
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If you feel you can't stop on your your own I hope you will seek help to stop drinking. There are online meetings and recovery forums that can help. I lived with an alcoholic for years and it was very sad to watch drink slowly destroy him. I hope you seek support.
 
Suzanne said:
I feel that way, but even if there was transport, due to extreme social anxiety, could not take that transport.

I am alone, at home mostly, as hubby works long hours and is not a conversationlist.

If I dwell too deep on my situation, I can get massive panic attack sensations, but my faith helps me so much, to put things back in balance and funny enough, our spiritual meeting yesterday, we discussed the subject on comparisions and how they can tear down and I know this so well.

I have siblings and a female birth parent, but my siblings have their own lives and I am not part of that and if I am stupid enough to take a look at my niece's facebook pages, it can make me feel like dying, so I have to try and not be stupid.

That female birth parent hates me, because I stood against her and so, when ever a sister or brother or niece got close to me, that female would make extreme disparaging remarks and sadly, my nieces were not raised right, so they think nothing of tact and I got to hear that the woman said that unlike my sister, who has family around her, I am completely alone; I am a nobody! I laughed at the time my niece related this, but sadly, too often it has become like an echo, because, even though I am married, I am not a mother and basically am alone, whereas that female who has done terrible things, gets to be surrounded by family. If I think too deeply, it can overwhelm me.

Do not have many friends anyway. My one friend now resides in her birth country and we chat regularly via whatsapp, but she is older and has many health battles, so the contact is not enough to take lonliness away.
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Hugs to you. This makes me feel sad. The lack of a tight knit family I have gotten through. I am not envious of their lives, though I wonder why they saw my isolation they offered no help? Primarily that has been with the help of decades-old friends and my spouse. Every time I have been hesitant to try something new, a friend or three will tell me: "Sure you can. Here's how."
 
So, here is an update. I discovered an AA meeting that seems like it would be a good fit for me, and they will be having a Zoom meeting this evening. I plan on joining in on that.

I also plan on giving the rest of the booze in my house to a good friend (who is not an alcoholic) later today, when I get home from work. I just have to resolve to not purchase any more for the rest of my life.

This is just the start. I figure the weight in my belly will start coming off when I stop drinking all that beer and whiskey. I might actually have more energy in a couple of weeks as the result of this. In any case, last night my heartbeat was irregular and that really panicked the hell out of me, and I am thinking it was all the booze that did that. I now have the resolve to give it up.
 
Great decision. Yep, the health risks do catch up with you. Nice guy I met recently was saying although he'd had a heart attack he couldn't give up smoking, and who also drank quite a lot, collapsed and probably not coming out of hospital. Think he's your age. Choices do run out. Take care.
 
Maybe save up for some form of transportation so you can get out and meet people! Great choices here. We all can learn from you and you moving forward.
 
Aspychata said:
Maybe save up for some form of transportation so you can get out and meet people! Great choices here. We all can learn from you and you moving forward.
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With all of the cash I will be saving by not spending money on alcohol and marijuana (and the subsequent Amazon purchases I make while wasted), I realistically will be able to afford Uber rides to and from social meetups.
 
Excellent. It's amazing to think your social life will start happening again. These things are a process. One foot at a time. My friend lost alot of his belly about 7 years ago. You will have some loose skin but over year it will tighten up. If not, check out radio frequency and laser, these also tighten skin. You will start feeling better about yourself and meet more friends.
 
I attended my first AA meeting via Zoom today. It seemed to be friendly enough. As soon as people heard it was my first meeting at that fellowship, they showered me with a rather embarrassing amount of attention. So much for laying back and checking out the atmosphere, I guess.
 
KagamineLen said:
I attended my first AA meeting via Zoom today. It seemed to be friendly enough. As soon as people heard it was my first meeting at that fellowship, they showered me with a rather embarrassing amount of attention. So much for laying back and checking out the atmosphere, I guess.
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Woohooo!!! :wink:
 
Honestly, the physical cravings for alcohol are extremely strong for me right now. I know they will pass with time.

I have an addiction to alcohol, I may as well embrace that fact so I can move on with my life. I plan on avoiding the corner stores for the time being.
 
Did you meet anyone who can be your accountability buddy? It can help to have someone to talk to when the cravings are strong.
 
Cravings definitely reduce in a while. I used to drink more than I think was good for me, and I couldn't at the time see how to not do so. I stopped entirely for a while, in the end.

It's great that you have taken some action, well done! Obviously there's an underlying issue that you mentioned in your title here, that you are now already starting to address by starting to get the alcohol issues from stopping you having a life. Good progress!
 
Maybe flavored seltzers, l keep these in my fridge. Maybe making smoothies, easiest one is 2 bananas and a 1/2 yogurt and flavored fizzy seltzer in blender. It gives you plenty potassium and should help with a feeling of fullness. Drink one every time you think of drinking. Reward yourself at the end of the week if you can make it to Sunday. And you can always come to this forum.
 
I hope you can feel supported by “us,” on the harder days, hours, minutes.


A friend of mine quit drinking 30 years ago. He had sunk right down to the bottom. Was sort of living rough on the streets of San Diego CA. His best friend was also an addict, & then the friend got beaten up and died. (I didn’t know him at that time) My friend made it to a rehab somenow, then after a year of hard work & meetings, met his future wife.
 
I have $50 in my wallet, and I feel the pull of the corner store. Yep, those corner stores are addiction central - they sell beer, lotto tickets and junk food. Only one of those addictions apply to me.

I think I am going to go to a legitimate grocery store instead and buy something to throw on my grill this evening. Along with some carbonated non-alcoholic low-calorie drinks. And some Vitamin B since I heard that alcohol drains that from the body. Maybe I will wait until I can get somebody to drive me, since it will be harder to buy beer if somebody is watching my moves in the store.
 
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