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Everybody I know has a life except for myself

Wanting a drink, being cranky as hell, and puking are all
congruent with low blood sugar. Also, focusing on very
negative past experiences...
 
You are probably right. I do not feel like eating much despite the fact that I am cooking up this beautiful butter chicken, but I probably should eat some of it before sending it straight to the fridge.
 
I hope you got some food and some sleep. You seem like you can be that good parent to yourself that your own parents have failed to be. That's surely the way forward? Your mother and how she is won't change, probably. Can you accept that and be the parent she couldn't, or ? Or what?

Because in the end, do we spend our life as a child who wont accept that mummy and daddy didn't know how to look after us, or do we realise, hey, despite that I can do it for myself? I am putting it baldly to be clear, but I know on some level I have had to wrestle with that much longer than I wish. But we see it on the news, in drama and literature all the time, and in our friends and colleagues families too.

People are uneven, narcissistic and in denial of things. The package on offer from your mother is, agree you somehow imagined it and be dominated and controlled by her. That's all she has. You are right to rage at this. But unlike a child who has no choice but to rage and cry and be trapped when adults let us down, as adults we can, if we choose, make a different decision.

You can tell her you are unable to be in much contact while she keeps up this denial. You can follow up by not being in much, or any, contact. Then you have your own life to manage, and you can be the parent you needed for yourself, including taking action to get support for yourself.

If you think she should do it, why can't you do it? You have it in you, same as she does, if she chose. She is choosing not to step up. Are you making that same choice? Be kinder to yourself and look after that hurt child by finding better support for him than your family.
 
I am doing somewhat better today, but I feel as if I have entered a state of existential nihilism.
 
Thanks.

Currently, I feel ridiculously tempted to dive deep into the well of short term hedonism. Which is a horrible idea.
 
Well, I have not had a drink since the day I started this thread. I have discovered that now I have more of a sweet tooth than what I used to have when I was still drinking, though, so that is another thing I have to be careful about.
 
I have a sweet tooth too and it always hits me at night time. It gets much worse in Autumn and Winter on long dark nights.
Someone told me to drink an electrolyte mixture, like athletes use during long runs. I am going to order some.
Here.
 
Damn, I just realized I spent all of this time without a drop of booze in my belly.
 
And isn't seafood implicated in gout too? I think my friend who has it said he blames the seafood and the wine...

Sorry you are up against this. Dietary changes do help with this definitely.
 
I also have gout and on top of type II diabetis, so eating low glycemic foods like oatmeal, or eating a lot of veggies and high quality protein is not good for gout. I am on Allopurinol and have not had a gout attack in years. I can have the occasional beer without harm, so I treat myself to Dragon's Milk (Stout aged in Bourbon barrels) where I can enjoy the flavor.
 
Thinx said:
And isn't seafood implicated in gout too? I think my friend who has it said he blames the seafood and the wine...

Sorry you are up against this. Dietary changes do help with this definitely.
Click to expand...

I love most seafood, such a shame to give that up as well.

I also love red meat, which I have to limit for the rest of my life.

Anything to not feel the gout pain again, I guess.
 
Sorry to hear this. I find l am limiting everything in my life. My red zone popped up on my mental desktop. I am keeping unsupportive people away. Limited my car garage visits. Just went thru the twilight zone in my home 24/7. Trying to move around normal neighbors but that has been tough. I know you can succeed at this because the worse in your life is over- You moved!!! And are no longer at home. Your new posts have been filled with self-improvment and great goals.
 
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