How much do looks really matter to women? And how much does personality (if at all)?

[Mary Terry]

Interesting, that happens to be how I court women, maybe I should change my strategy? Less naked dancing?

Depends on who you want to date.

 

[Forest Cat]

Depends on who you want to date.

 

[Tired]

It worked on my ex It was the naked dancing in her yard that attracted her.

It must have been quite a sight!

 

[RemyZee]

You completely ignored the point I was trying to make.

My point was that personality is a scam. You can never really know someone's personality because it's intangible and it's always changing. It can take many years to figure out someone's personality but it takes just 4 seconds to know if someone is attractive.

Also have you noticed that characters intended to be despicable are always made to be as ugly as possible.

For humans, someone's personality is always reflected in their appearance.

Humans will always treat beautiful people as more capable and kind and ugly people as cruel and guilty. It's called 'the halo effect'. Check it out.

People tend to have a just world fallacy to some degree too. Being ugly is bad, thus he must be a bad person thus 'deserving' those bad looks. It's a way of adhering justice in a world that has no morals at all.

Characters intended to be despicable are always made to be as ugly as possible.

Even when when the villain is attractive he is viewed as sympathetic. The only example I can think of of a sympathetic unattractive villain is the penguin from one of the old Batman movies. That's the only one I can think of.

So whenever someone talks about personality I know that it is just an acceptable way in a rational morality of saying that they despise the physical characteristics of a person or group, so I think that personality = looks.

People gravitate.

 

[Jonn]

Thinking about this in human context, if I came home and found my husband had scattered a bunch of colorful junk around the front door and was dancing around the yard like a naked madman to attract my attention, I would not be amused.

 

[Jonn]

@Outdated once posted a hilarious TV advertisement or commercial from Australia with some bulls riding in a truck, looking for the heifers. I can't find it in the archives, darn it.

 

[Outdated]

@Outdated once posted a hilarious TV advertisement or commercial from Australia with some bulls riding in a truck, looking for the heifers. I can't find it in the archives, darn it.

I was going to repost it but Jonn beat me to it.

It's part of a series of Toyota ads that get posted as "banned" adverts but they're only banned in the US. They were regular adverts on prime time TV here, the Bugger! campaign ran for about 10 years. Words are contextual here and only considered rude if the usage was intended to be rude.

 

[Outdated]

Back to the original question in this thread - The only difference between men and women that I've seen is that women try to be a bit more discreet and are incredibly embarrassed when they get caught perving. Other than that there's no real difference.

 

[Neri]

Back to the original question in this thread - The only difference between men and women that I've seen is that women try to be a bit more discreet and are incredibly embarrassed when they get caught perving. Other than that there's no real difference.

These days, in my area, guys seem to be cottoning on to the need for sneaky, discreet perving, so it seems the "difference" between the sexes is narrowing.

 

[Tired]

Back to the original question in this thread - The only difference between men and women that I've seen is that women try to be a bit more discreet and are incredibly embarrassed when they get caught perving. Other than that there's no real difference.

Yeah women are shamed for being sexual, while for men it is fine and often even encouraged, to be macho and stuff.

 

[Jonn]

These days, in my area, guys seem to be cottoning on to the need for sneaky, discreet perving, so it seems the "difference" between the sexes is narrowing.

But each sex would usually have different reasons for being discrete, I suspect.

 

[Outdated]

Yeah women are shamed for being sexual, while for men it is fine and often even encouraged, to be macho and stuff.

I think that's a little more true in Europe than it is in Australia, up to a point. Personally, I very much prefer women that know what they want and don't play games.

 

[Tired]

I think that's a little more true in Europe than it is in Australia, up to a point. Personally, I very much prefer women that know what they want and don't play games.

That's probably also very close to specifically slav countries, where woman is just "an addition to the man."

 

[Outdated]

That's probably also very close to specifically slav countries, where woman is just "an addition to the man."

I think more so all of southern Europe, Greeks and Italians are well known for those sorts of old attitudes, Spaniards too. I had a French girlfriend for a while and there's hangovers of that old attitude in France as well. As you go further east it seems to get worse and worse, I don't think the middle east is a pleasant place for women.

 

[Tired]

I think more so all of southern Europe, Greeks and Italians are well known for those sorts of old attitudes, Spaniards too. I had a French girlfriend for a while and there's hangovers of that old attitude in France as well. As you go further east it seems to get worse and worse, I don't think the middle east is a pleasant place for women.

I think more so all of southern Europe, Greeks and Italians are well known for those sorts of old attitudes, Spaniards too. I had a French girlfriend for a while and there's hangovers of that old attitude in France as well. As you go further east it seems to get worse and worse, I don't think the middle east is a pleasant place for women.

It's scary, oppressive, debilitating, shameful. I am still struggling sometimes with setting boundaries, because men tend to ignore them. But at least I know, that despite how dark it is, it's better, than before. So hopefully future generations of women will be more free to just being themselves.

 

[Outdated]

So hopefully future generations of women will be more free to just being themselves.

I think it will take many generations, and the more religious a society is the less likely it is that change will happen at all. Personally I find it difficult to understand and I think for a lot of men they've never experienced anything different and don't know any better. Having a compliant sex toy doesn't seem much different to me than having a blow up doll, a woman that knows what she wants and is determined to get it is a lot more fun.

 

[Tired]

I think it will take many generations, and the more religious a society is the less likely it is that change will happen at all. Personally I find it difficult to understand and I think for a lot of men they've never experienced anything different and don't know any better. Having a compliant sex toy doesn't seem much different to me than having a blow up doll, a woman that knows what she wants and is determined to get it is a lot more fun.

I wholeheartedly agree about religions.
And many men are used to receiving, not giving, it's hard to change that type of entitlement they have.

 

[Outdated]

And many men are used to receiving, not giving, it's hard to change that type of entitlement they have.

It takes two to tango. Women themselves are also part of the problem, most women are more worried about what other women will think of them than what perception men have. Other women will often frown on behaviour seen as precocious and try to enforce the old regime.

 

[Tired]

It takes two to tango. Women themselves are also part of the problem, most women are more worried about what other women will think of them than what perception men have. Other women will often frown on behaviour seen as precocious and try to enforce the old regime.

Oh yes, many patriarchal women will bully those, who go against the flow. That's all the women from my family.

 

[Forest Cat]

That's probably also very close to specifically slav countries, where woman is just "an addition to the man."

In Norway we treat the women well, if we don't we have to hide in a forest in Sweden until they calm down. Hell hath no fury like a angry Norwegian woman.