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I messed up again

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@Markness

What is your expectation for this thread?

You've titled it "I messed up again."

What are you looking for, as replies?
 
There are at least two ways to interpret your story.

The optimistic one:

You've decided to take action, which is good, But you're still working on your technique.
In hindsight, you wish you'd talked to the goth checkout person, and you regret that you didn't.
You've decided to work on your attitude (so you become socially "braver"), and on your technique, so in the future you'll know how to act, what you might say, and how you can prepare (e.g. by including "goth indications" in your appearance if you have a distinct preference for that style).

Positive indicators for this interpretation:
1. You describe the real issue, which was a failure on your part to act - present
2. You experienced a positive reaction to what happened (mild regret, and a decision to act another time) - absent
3. You ask for practical advice - absent

Of course you might be using this experience positively despite the missing positive indicators. (1) isn't a bad start. If so: it's not too late for you to reframe your comments and ask some questions.
 
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Did I truly miss out or am I needlessly beating myself up over something unrealistic?
You don't know how to regard the interaction with the clerk and
you want people to tell you whether you blew a fabulous chance
for romance, or whether it was more likely another experience to
build on?

The girl didn't vanish in a puff of smoke or turn to ashes when you left, did she?
The store is still in business and you may return there sometime?
 
You don't know how to regard the interaction with the clerk and
you want people to tell you whether you blew a fabulous chance
for romance, or whether it was more likely another experience to
build on?

The girl didn't vanish in a puff of smoke or turn to ashes when you left, did she?
The store is still in business and you may return there sometime?
That’s more or less how I feel about it.

No, that didn’t happen and Walgreens is still in business.
 
You find yourself unable to identify the meaning of events in your life.

Let's see.
A chance meeting with a clerk in a store,
which in all likelihood is something that could be a recurring situation.

Meaning, the store still exists, the clerk still works there, it's a place
you frequent, you're alive & sufficiently able bodied to return there.

Which direction would you say that points to?
To A? Or more toward B?
 
You find yourself unable to identify the meaning of events in your life.

Let's see.
A chance meeting with a clerk in a store,
which in all likelihood is something that could be a recurring situation.

Meaning, the store still exists, the clerk still works there, it's a place
you frequent, you're alive & sufficiently able bodied to return there.

Which direction would you say that points to?
To A? Or more toward B?
I guess B. I am just really despondent that I am still struggling to achieve the connection I want since I was 17 and I am not getting any younger.
 
Not getting any younger?
How would getting younger help?

Continual regression in age would remove the
advantage of learning from your experiences.
 
Not getting any younger?
How would getting younger help?

Continual regression in age would remove the
advantage of learning from your experiences.
I tend to worry about time running out for me.

I guess I didn’t think it through.
 
Wait! I use a cork or float when I fish for bass and bream, so my bait won't sink to the bottom of the lake. I cast the line and start slowly reeling it in.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Trolling_(fishing)Trolling is a method of fishing where one or more fishing lines, baited with lures or bait fish, are drawn through the water at a consistent, low speed.

In American English, trolling can be phonetically confused with trawling, a different method of fishing where a net (trawl) is drawn through the water instead of lines. Trolling is used both for recreational and commercial fishing whereas trawling is used mainly for commercial fishing.

=============
Meanwhile, back to the topic.

Which is>
Attempts to point out to the OP that an experience one day
which doesn't seem to be a perfect 'success' is not an utter
failure, that in fact, it can be considered a learning experience,
when the person will consider it as such and learn from it.
 
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