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Meetup.com needs to be banned.

Just because you haven't gotten on with meetup.com, doesn't mean that every person with a disability cannot or will not benefit from the place. I used to have a friend on the spectrum who enjoyed using that website, so everyone is different.
 
Tony Ramirez said:
"Find your people". I want to slap in the face the jackass who came out with that saying.
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Expressions of violent motivation is a real turnoff for women. And everyone else you encounter. You can IGNORE trite sayings like "find your own people". I never liked the saying, either, but it does not prompt me to become violent.
 
Steelbookcollector217 said:
well in my perspective, not really blaming them, not saying its their fault, its easy to envy and resent the social advantages they have over men, and what they expect of us men, and i know i'm right about this, even men who have a better attitude than me and Tony do, or the complete oppossite attitude of me and tony, are still at a higher rate or risk than women are at being forever alone/chronically single.

Sometimes i like to think, which i have said over the years, women are the only gender that are owed a relationship since naturally by default they always have offers, have suitors, men normally never have suitors or women coming onto them, making passes at them.

And i mostly envy young couples, especially teen and early 20s couples, 20-something couples, because its a reminder that, not everyone gets to date or have relationships in their youth, younger years, innocent years.
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Steelbookcollector and Tony spend way too much time blaming women and other people for their problems.

I am personally offended by these posts. They trivialize all the trials, problems, challenges I have faced as a woman. They trivialize all the successes, goals reached or progress made in spite of being a woman. You have no idea what it is like to be a woman so stop blaming women for your mental health problems.

If you were blaming blacks or Jews or Muslims for your problems, your posts would be banned.

You both have been offered lots of help by well-meaning people on this forum, all of whom have had serious challenges in their lives, some more than you.

But instead you whine and complain and stay stuck in a sick place because you won't take responsibility for your own life. If you spent the energy you spend whining and blaming on actually doing something different, you would make progress. If you spent more time practicing gratitude for what you do have, you would be more pleasant to be around.

It is okay to be lonely. It is ok to be discouraged. There is even a thread for ranting. But it is not okay to blame others for your problems. It is especially not okay to blame entire groups of people. It is not okay to characterize groups of people and throw them all into one basket. This is offensive and should not be permitted.
 
Rodafina said:
This is a description of your pain and frustration that you could appropriately discuss with a therapist.

Turning your pain and frustration into rude or unkind comments toward women is not an acceptable outlet for your feelings.

That behavior will also rightly prevent most women from wanting to interact with you.
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Rodafina said:
This is a description of your pain and frustration that you could appropriately discuss with a therapist.

Turning your pain and frustration into rude or unkind comments toward women is not an acceptable outlet for your feelings.

That behavior will also rightly prevent most women from wanting to interact with you.
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yeah but even if i do go to a therapist, nature and reality will still be the same, statistically, men end up forever alone more than women do, even when men have a better attitude than me and tony do.
 
Rodafina said:
It is more than just venting. They need to hear the impact that their words have on other people.
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I guess being put in the emergency room twice in four months is not enough for trying enough. Really I guess I have too "put myself out there even more now" and take the bullying, laughing and ostracizing from women I did nothing wrong but try to talk and be friendly with in an actual social groups not any damn cold approach or minding my business, so it's not supposed to be creepy.
 
Tony Ramirez said:
I guess being put in the emergency room twice in four months is not enough for trying enough. Really I guess I have too "put myself out there even more now" and take the bullying, laughing and ostracizing from women I did nothing wrong but try to talk and be friendly with in an actual social groups not any damn cold approach or minding my business, so it's not supposed to be creepy.
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No, Tony. What I think you have to do is stop saying terrible things about women.

I cannot solve your problems with advice. What I can do is tell you that the way you talk about women is very unhealthy and will not help you achieve your goals. It is harmful to others and will turn people away from you.
 
Tony Ramirez said:
They are saying horrible things about me.
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We all must learn how to not do the wrong thing even when someone else is doing that. Remember the phrase, “Two wrongs do not make a right.“

When you speak so badly about women in general, you are including all the women who never did anything at all wrong to you. Like those of us here on the forum who are still talking to you even though you say terrible things about us.
 
It can be a dispiriting, lonely and anger inducing when a male person on the spectrum is not appreciated by, or noticed by women.

But as Rodafina mentions, it is better to keep complaining about women in general to a minimum, otherwise you might be perceived or labelled as a misogynist and then you'll receive even more alienating vibes from women.
 
I have good experiences with Meetup. Once I went to some guy's house to watch a movie, four people showed up and we didn't know each other, but it went well. Another time I went to a bar, and meet it went ok too.

I think the platform is fine, but of course it's harder for a lot of us who aren't very social. I mean, it's not like strangers will be our therapists and walk us through socialization.
 
Tony Ramirez said:
They are saying horrible things about me.
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That tends to happen when you act like a horrible person. Are you seeing the problem here?

"As you desire good treatment from others, so render it." ~ Unknown.

Tony Ramirez said:
Is that a real book or a metaphor?
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It's a real book, rather, a popular series of books intended to be read while on the john attending to, er, serious matters. It is one of the few NT humour series that has jokes in it I can relate to. I tend to watch a lot of comedies with a blank stare. Yes, I recognize why it is funny to NTs, but I do not connect personally. Reading a copy of Uncle Johns is good for some giggles and giggles are good for everyone.
 
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