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The last thing that made you laugh

As usual, I didn't actually laugh, but I thought this was both true and funny
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Ken: Sex, Money and Power - those are the only three things everyone is interested in, and people are actually surprised when i say that I'm a bit interested in money as well.

*Audience Laughs*

Ken: How Dare You! I've got money I've never used yet...It just so happens one of my hobbies is collecting pictures of the Queen.
 
Hey, Kanye, I'm a not let you finish - Pan Am Sound Guy

What is with people actually getting what they deserve this week?
 
What is a Teenager?
A teenager is someone who leaves the house at night in a car, but comes back in a police van.
 
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Some funny newspaper-related jokes:

1. Jeremy Paxton was bitten by a dog on his way to the studio tonight. However, after been given an injection and treatment for shock, the dog was allowed to go home.

2. FOR SALE: Vaulting pole - slightly imperfect, but will suit enthusiastic midget.

3. FOR SALE: 300 copies of Playboy magazines and assorted sex toys - will exchange for Zimmer frame and Orthopedic Bed.

4. PERSONAL COLUMN: Short, squat, ugly, bald-headed pensioner wishes to meet tall, wealthy, beautiful blonde, with a view to a warm and passionate relationship. Sense of humor essential.

5. PERSONAL COLUMN: Arthur, I think of you every night as I lie waiting for your touch. P.S, I'm on the other side of the bed. Your wife, Doris.
 
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I passed by a food stand as I was going home that said: "salt water taffy - over 30 true flavors available." It made me wonder how many fake flavors they had as well.
 
The story I'm reading - there is this homeless urchin who doesn't know the king is the king and, she met him on a walk and is insulting and sassing him terribly. LOL
 
Beverly said:
The story I'm reading - there is this homeless urchin who doesn't know the king is the king and, she met him on a walk and is insulting and sassing him terribly. LOL
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Reminds me of a story I read. This king was walking through town and it got dark. Someone bumped into him and as soon as he got back to the castle, the king decreed that all townsfolk must carry a lantern at night. The next night, the king was walking through town again and the same person bumps into him a second time. The king demands an explanation and the other person says the law didn't say the lantern had to have a candle. Upon returning to the castle, the king revised the law to specify that. The next night, the king is walking through town again and the same person bumps into him for a third time. Again the king demands an explanation and the other person says the law didn't say the candle had to be lit. At that point, the king gives up and scraps the law.
 
dudeman said:
Reminds me of a story I read. This king was walking through town and it got dark. Someone bumped into him and as soon as he got back to the castle, the king decreed that all townsfolk must carry a lantern at night. The next night, the king was walking through town again and the same person bumps into him a second time. The king demands an explanation and the other person says the law didn't say the lantern had to have a candle. Upon returning to the castle, the king revised the law to specify that. The next night, the king is walking through town again and the same person bumps into him for a third time. Again the king demands an explanation and the other person says the law didn't say the candle had to be lit. At that point, the king gives up and scraps the law.
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LOL, as bad as this girl, only the king likes being led around the seedy side of town and treated like a normal person, she's now talked him into eating curry at a tavern with her, and the two are getting drunk - this is going to be good. :)
 
Beverly said:
LOL, as bad as this girl, only the king likes being led around the seedy side of town and treated like a normal person, she's now talked him into eating curry at a tavern with her, and the two are getting drunk - this is going to be good. :)
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What is the name of the story? Is it a book?
 
ancusmitis said:
What is the name of the story? Is it a book?
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No, it's a story on Wattpad - it actually has 3 parts so, yes it is book length. It's a Tutankhaten/Tutankhamen story but, the language is a bit more modern that usual for stories set in Ancient Egypt. It took me a few chapters to get used that but, it's turning out to be a good story.

Part 1 is here, then there are links to the rest at the end of each part.
https://www.wattpad.com/story/8062665-broken-timepiece-volume-1-fear
 
Sharing a thought ...

We have encountered folks that are stupid. When this happens, remember that you are dealing with the sperm that won, the champion of them all, the fastest, the best of the best .....
 
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If someone says that they would take a bullet for you.....
DON"T be impressed.
It means they would rather die than spend time with you.
 
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