What are you trying to overcome?

[Xinyta]

Apathy and self-created psychosomatic fears.

I feel trapped both emotionally and mentally. I have feelings inside. I truly do. But it's been impossible to express them in alot of ways. Especially since I feel like I am not genuine in most of what do show. If I do.

I have spent so long building fears and lies in myself, that I naturally default to them. And it seems very difficult to overcome. That I feel afraid of doing things and/or interacting with people. It's created paranoia. And worse. It's created psychosis and a anxiety disorder in me. I take meds for my profound anxiety. But fear I feel still psychologically, still tries to search and trigger my, now non-existent, anxiety. To no avail. Making me question how I can shut this off.

I have recently discovered that I likely have a Toliet Phobia/Anxiety. The only reason I never did explore this before, is the same reason I never explored my trama. I was too far gone in my own world to care.

 

[Aspychata]

Sorry @Xinyta , but l would still talk to you. l think we develope phobias to deal with what we don't know how to deal with.

 

[Aspychata]

My hardest lesson to date is, nobody is our friend. Some of us walk very tough paths, you need to adjust your rose-colored glasses, and understand there are others plotting against you for no understandable reason. It's a life lesson. You still walk forward, but you change your thoughts to accept that people aren't nice, you personally need to get with the program if you worship survival, Pure Survival. If this was the only gift l could give to thr forum, it's that.

 

[Aspychata]

Partner gaslit me yesterday. It's an ongoing obstacle. Not quite sure what to do as l play a critical role in their health plan currently.

 

[Rodafina]

Studying a seemingly impossible puzzle of how I get back to work without sacrificing taking care of myself (eating well, exercising, managing tough emotions, regularly speaking to loved ones and taking care of my aging dog).

 

[Roisin]

Sciatica and nerve pain shooting down my arm.

 

[Aspychata]

Big obstacle, asking someone why they are gaslighting me. Putting more boundaries in place. Told them l am not sure about us. But remaining civil and mature. Sometimes l become upset, so learning to state boundaries is helping.

 

[Neri]

Getting myself home. Cleaning out my old house with my ex as soon as we get out of Canberra, where we've been stuck after my ex's mum's funeral, because of a cyclone and the resultant flooding in the area where my old house is. I've been struggling with grief, burn out, shut downs (including sibstantial non verbal, non moving and not able to communicate episodes) and I, had a really bad melt down the day, which I don't feel recovered from yet. I'm struggling to talk at all or be social at all.
My brain functioning is scary low level. My ex is quite unwell as well. Sigh. This is really hard. I can't wait to get back to my new home and for this to be all over and I can focus on getting well and getting my new life happening.

 

[Xinyta]

Sorry @Xinyta , but l would still talk to you. l think we develope phobias to deal with what we don't know how to deal with.

That's more or less my life. Creating phobias to avoid doing things. The irony is. They all are lies, yet I cling to them. Like I simply refuse to belive that I can live without them.

I appreciate the sentiment of still wanting to talk to me. Though more in concept, than in action.

 

[AprilR]

Nausea, anxiety and fatigue