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KevinMao133

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  • Currently experiencing depression, or a rut as they like to call it

    I don’t want to sleep, I don’t want to wake up, things I used to interest me doesn’t ignite joy. Also, self doubt all the time, questioning my very existence
    I just came back on and people are still attacking me over the born in a wrong era thread lol

    It’s hard to avoid drama since these folks always want to start something over nothing
    Why is everyone calling me toxic for simply stating the truth?

    The rise of social media, the trends that became popular, the shows that are airing, Hollywood, western propaganda. You can’t say those things haven’t influenced the way people are thinking

    We are the byproducts of our environments, if the environment is not good, which it is, then people will be affected, myself included
    KevinMao133
    KevinMao133
    @Kitsuna true. Not going to pretend I’m all that, I’m not. That said, I’m going crazy right now, due to all the people calling me ignorant and shallow

    Maybe all the improvements I made over the last 4 years are for show I guess. Maybe I’m still the same guy five years ago
    Kitsuna
    Kitsuna
    I can’t tell you either way, but you also could just be hitting a bump. Keep going.
    KevinMao133
    KevinMao133
    @Kitsuna emotionally it’s always being like that. It doesn’t affect me though, at least I try my best to hold it down
    People are mad I’m speaking the truth lol

    I bet some of you think Kanye is crazy when in reality he is not and never was
    Being in china, most of the women here prefer dating men from the same race so I have yet to meet an interracial couple

    Also women around me are treating me well so it’s good
    Tired
    Tired
    I think that everyone who is a man is a misogynist, otherwise he would choose to be born as a woman. :mad:
    M
    Misty Avich
    Yeah I don't think all these labels from having opinions really helps anyone. If a man doesn't like women so be it, as long as he's not planning on harming women (or anyone) physically then I don't care what people's opinions are lol
    KevinMao133
    KevinMao133
    The rule I have with women is to treat them like people

    Well I’m treating them like bros so there’s that
    The key to living a peaceful life is.. legalizing weed

    Let me tell you something: the first time I tried weed, I was scared. Though I was worried for a sec, it changed my life for the better. I’m no longer as anxious, I’m more chill and I’m a better person

    It also drove me as I wrote better afterwards. I knew that having weed by my side strengths my already strong core
    Is hyperarousal a form of anxiety or is it part of stimming?
    Judge
    Judge
    Actually it's associated with Post Traumatic Stress Disorder.
    People always got something to say about everything

    It’s important to find the right direction. It is ok to live through chaos as being in a chaotic environment help me grow
    I have said this before and I will say it again: the hypocrisy needs to stop

    Neurotypicals can shame us effortlessly but yet we have no rights to make rebuttals of our own

    We aren’t been treated like humans yet we are expected to act like we belong
    My entire life feels forced

    I been masking for too long that I’m a full blown actor
    Tony Ramirez
    Tony Ramirez
    I know the feeling. If you tell them they pretend they understand but one or two atypical mistakes and your banished.
    Slowly but surely my body is breaking down

    The more I workout, the worse I feel

    I only feel well when I’m doing something, when I’m not stressed
    I’m writing a story right now

    Ideas are in my head and I know what to write

    When I start writing though, it’s difficult. Mental block, expectations, it’s odd
    I’m too distracted today

    I’m dealing with stress, expectations

    Also writing something I have never written before, I’m feeling uncomfortable
    I’m stressed

    I have zero dollars in my bank account right now. Have a couple bills I need to pay

    Tomorrow I got something important I have to deal with. I’m not in the mood
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