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KevinMao133

KevinMao133

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  • KevinMao133
    I’m high today, thus I’m in a euphoric state of mind

    When I’m high, I believe I’m great at everything. My ego is inflated
    Kayla55
    Kayla55
    ;The angel of the Lord came and sat down under the oak in Ophrah that belonged to Joash the Abiezrite, where his son Gideonwas threshing wheat in a winepress to keep it from the Midianites.When the angel of the Lord appeared to Gideon, he said, “The Lordis with you, mighty warrior.”
    KevinMao133
    Crazy what body dysmorphia does to a man

    I swear I’m fatter than what the scale says

    At times I think I’m super skinny, which is false too
    F
    FilterFreq
    I'm pretty sure I have the same thing going on. We're probably more average than we think, but that doesnt always change the way we see ourselves
    M
    Misty Avich
    I look quite slim when I look down at myself but then when I catch myself in any mirror I look rather large and become shocked. I guess that's what happens when you have an addiction to crisps (potato chips)
    KevinMao133
    Just got into an imaginative argument with myself

    I’m distracted, stressed
    M
    Misty Avich
    Wow, are you me? Lol. Me and you seem to have a lot in common :)
    I'm sorry you're feeling stressed.
    KevinMao133
    I have never invited drama yet it keeps coming my way

    I don’t get it
    View previous comments…
    M
    Misty Avich
    So for example, if I have a loyal friend whom I trust but they're talking to somebody I don't like, I wouldn't get upset or have a go at them for it. Just because a friend is talking to someone you dislike it doesn't mean they're doing it to spite you, if they're a good friend. If talking to the person you dislike isn't going to affect your friendship then it doesn't matter who they talk to. That's the way I see it.
    M
    Misty Avich
    It may look like I'm an extremely oversensitive person on these forums who'd just fly up in a rage at anything and demand everyone to tread on eggshells around me, but it ain't like that. 9 times out of 10 I know exactly what gets to me and what doesn't, and I can only flare up if I feel like I'm being criticised or made fun of in public for all to read.
    M
    Misty Avich
    Even then it usually depends on the context and sensing the undertone in a post.
    KevinMao133
    I have a hard time following rules

    I also have no sense of boundaries, hence I have a hard time regulating my emotions
    Rocco
    Rocco
    I struggle with rules too. If the rule is not logical or common sense I tend to disregard it.
    AprilR
    AprilR
    I relate to the lack of boundaries also. I am careful with other people's but my own boundaries are non existent
    KevinMao133
    Is this an autistic thing: being hyper aware of oneself?

    I am ultra conscious, maybe too self conscious. I do well during the day but struggles at night, when I’m facing my inner demons
    F
    FilterFreq
    I would think so. I'm hyper-aware of myself in social situations, but way better when I'm alone, and I bet it works in reverse as well
    blue_bird
    blue_bird
    Me too. I feel I'm too self absorbed for my own good. At night while trying to fall asleep all I can think about are my deficits in life.
    Xinyta
    Xinyta
    Absolutely, @KevinMao133

    An unhealthy amount of self awareness is how I started to emotionally repress and start self tormenting. I'd even think about all my 'failures' as I went about my day and even at night.
    KevinMao133
    Often the victims end up as the perpetuators

    Look at Diddy, he’s a classic example
    View previous comments…
    KevinMao133
    KevinMao133
    @Forest Cat yes he is

    He entered the game through Andre Harrell and rose through the ranks through Clive Davis

    Clive and Harrell ate him first, and he did it to others
    Forest Cat
    Forest Cat
    Lots of people had a difficult life but they didn't rape people or behave like an animal because of it. I'm pretty sure he is just a stupid asshole. Calling him a victim is an insult to victims.
    F
    FilterFreq
    I would agree that it's really not a good excuse. I completely understand if a victim has serious issues and accidentally takes it out on others from time to time, but using it as a hall pass to hurt others on purpose is just evil
    KevinMao133
    You know how unfair society is towards people like us?

    Whenever neurotypicals act up, they are met with support

    Whenever I act up.. good luck finding someone that don’t hate me

    Why is it that my emotions are being punished and yet others can freely express themselves?
    AprilR
    AprilR
    It is about how you are perceived, which is very subjective. If people like you they are more likely to forgive some offenses they would not forgive from people they dont like.
    KevinMao133
    Thinking long and hard about something: I am narcissistic in some ways

    But the question I have to ask is: does having narcissistic tendencies equate to being a narcissist?
    All-Rounder
    All-Rounder
    You mean pathological narcissist? There is healthy narcissism, but sometimes it gets in the way if it's too much.
    KevinMao133
    KevinMao133
    @All-Rounder I’m still traumatized man. I was just thinking about one of the books I am reading, titled unlearning shame

    I never felt loved, thus it’s hard for me to build connections
    F
    FilterFreq
    I've got some tendencies as well. Honestly I think that if it's expressed in a constructive way that helps ourselves and others, it can really be positive
    KevinMao133
    People who don’t know me automatically assume I’m fat because I’m undisciplined

    Truth is, I struggle with body image issues as well as gut issues. My digestive system is horrendous

    It’s hard not to internalize everything but I try not to
    KevinMao133
    I can’t stand those who workout just to attract girls

    You think they will like you by adhering to their standards. In reality, you are nothing but a zoo animal in their eyes.

    Don’t change just because they want you to change. Do it because it will benefit you
    F
    FilterFreq
    Does that mean you don't like women who wear makeup? People doing things to improve themselves in any way doesn't seem like a bad thing at all to me
    KevinMao133
    I’m going back to China next month

    That said, I’m scared

    Family problems, cultural differences, feel like I’m inadequate

    I don’t want to go back. My life is good. No need to disrupt my peace
    KevinMao133
    I’m scared by my own emotions
    Rodafina
    Rodafina
    Emotions can be scary, but as with most scary things, trying to understand the thing will most likely lessen the fear.
    UberScout
    UberScout
    We've all been there.

    I myself have a phobia of back stories.
    KevinMao133
    I work well at night as I’m the most productive

    Yet people keep on trying to convert me, into someone I’m not

    I’m not a morning person, never will be. I don’t do well during the day, that is certain

    Only 30% of the population are morning birds yet they think they are better, when opposite is true
    jsilver256
    jsilver256
    Who exactly are the people converting you to being a morning person?
    KevinMao133
    I just wrote something. Now things become a lot more relaxing

    Hard part is writing, which I did. Proud of myself
    KevinMao133
    How come there are more guests than members? Asking a friend
    Forest Cat
    Forest Cat
    The coolest and most exclusive clubs always have more guests than members.
    F
    FilterFreq
    Probably bot traffic and search crawlers. The usual
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