Hanging out with a new friend from church today and his female friend viewing art.
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Tony Ramirez
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Again I judged another women wrong. Ran into someone random guy again from the church I know is right the fourth time at the supermarket, meet his female friend who I thought was in line in as a stranger. Ate late lunch with them. She was kind and nice. Guy maybe becoming a friend. Who knows?
It sucks not having friends IRL again.
Most of the best YouTube videos I found were not from search but were from for you suggestions from unrelated videos I was watching suggesting a related video which suggested other related videos. Then my homepage opened up with better suggestions.
I am really liking anime. I watched it at that cafe all summer even laughed at the funny parts when I still got resting faces. No one cared. Too bad I can't meet any women IRL who like it.
Describe my miserable summer
143 days of PTSD hell at a cafe and my trust in people is now down the crapper.
No one likes me.
I still can socialize when I am around people who want to actually talk to me. It was all in my head. Just try to avoid and get the heck out of the social places that were like higher education.
I'm actually having a good time at game night and I am socializing in groups.
I hate what I become again.
I now fully reverted back to my antisocial hateful college days thanks to being at that damn cafe for 6 months.
I'm pretty much desensitize to seeing and hearing every swear word except one because now I use them all now. Pathetic for someone who hates swearing. What these people done to me.
I should have stayed home today. It was not worth being with normals just for the free food. I rather starve or eat scraps at home now.
I'm starting to really hate to socialize or try to. I think I rather stay at home or go out to places with no people around.
I will never find my people.
PDA annoying me off.
I wish I can forget the worst years of my life college, training school, certificate school. (1995-1997, 1997-2000, 2003)
And of course all of 2024.
I wish I relive my junior high school years again (6th-8th grade 1988-1991). Best years of my life.
The snobs are out in force today. No, thank you or even excuse me or even smiles, just resting faces. Just like damn college and trade school. If it's bad with the church in the park at 3 PM, I am not leaving the damn house for a week. I mean it. -
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