Corrupt A Wish

[Ste11aeres]

WISH GRANTED:
You discover a 7,000 page document on
Unified Potato Field Theory and spend the
next 15 years as assistant consultant to a
Potato Specialist for the University of Idaho
Co-operative Extension.

I wish that the organ donor for Kelly Platsis on
'Troubled Lives' would turn out to be Lance Beaudreaux,
so that they could show their families that they really do
belong together despite the 35 year age difference.

Granted. Your own family is so moved by it, that they set you up on multiple blind dates with men 40 years older than you.

I wish I enjoyed socializing.

 

[tree]

WISH GRANTED:
You have a different escort to each
Wednesday Afternoon Bingo at St. Olaf's,
Saturday Square Dance Night with the Moose, and
every Friday Fish Fry at VFW Hall for the next
7 years because tree has donated all the
blind dates her family set up for her--to you.

I wish that Morgana would stop dancing with Alfrere long
enough to wish her brother farewell as he leaves for the
Intercontinental Hike to Oblivion in the third episode of
the 4th season of 'Noncommittal, Comatose, & Fragrant:
Love in the 2nd Dimension' because she will regret it later.

 

[camerartus]

WISH GRANTED:
You have a different escort to each
Wednesday Afternoon Bingo at St. Olaf's,
Saturday Square Dance Night with the Moose, and
every Friday Fish Fry at VFW Hall for the next
7 years because tree has donated all the
blind dates her family set up for her--to you.

I wish that Morgana would stop dancing with Alfrere long
enough to wish her brother farewell as he leaves for the
Intercontinental Hike to Oblivion in the third episode of
the 4th season of 'Noncommittal, Comatose, & Fragrant:
Love in the 2nd Dimension' because she will regret it later.

Nice touch with the St. Olaf bit. [emoji851]

 

[Ste11aeres]

WISH GRANTED:
You have a different escort to each
Wednesday Afternoon Bingo at St. Olaf's,
Saturday Square Dance Night with the Moose, and
every Friday Fish Fry at VFW Hall for the next
7 years because tree has donated all the
blind dates her family set up for her--to you.

I wish that Morgana would stop dancing with Alfrere long
enough to wish her brother farewell as he leaves for the
Intercontinental Hike to Oblivion in the third episode of
the 4th season of 'Noncommittal, Comatose, & Fragrant:
Love in the 2nd Dimension' because she will regret it later.

Wish Granted:
She gives so much time to that farewell that every episode from that time on is a continuation of that farewell scene, and it lasts for seven more seasons.

I wish that I had better knife skills in the kitchen.

 

[Reedstorm17]

You have such great knife skills that everyone makes you do all the cooking from now on.

I wish I got more than four hours of sleep Friday night.

 

[Butterfly88]

Granted, but you only sleep for four hours and one minute.

I wish college wasn't so stressful.

 

[Reedstorm17]

It's so easy you get bored.

I wish I could work on my research paper without getting distracted with writing my book.

 

[Flinty]

Granted. You are now distracted with writing a song.

I wish people would stop assuming that I live in a house.

 

[Ste11aeres]

Granted. Your coworkers know for certain that you don't live in a house, since they can see that you now live in a tent set up in the front entrance of your workplace.

I wish I would enter and win Cutthroat Kitchen.

 

[Reedstorm17]

Just after you win, some jealous competitor hits you over the head and you forget everything that happened in the last day.

I wish my parents weren't taking out the carpet in my house that's been there my whole life.

 

[tree]

WISH GRANTED:
In compliance with your wish to retain the carpet, they
have instead removed the house.

I wish the generator page would fix that situation
where the page gets hung up saying that everything
is HTML, including the approved lists that the page
itself offers.

 

[Flinty]

Granted. The site has been taken down entirely.

I wish Necco wafers were edible.

 

[Ste11aeres]

Granted. You are now allergic to any other type of food.

I wish I didn't have to sleep.

 

[Butterfly88]

Granted, but you soon become bored and run out of things to do because you are up 24/7.

I wish I felt better physically.

 

[Reedstorm17]

You feel better physically because you can no longer feel anything.

I wish my throat didn't hurt every time I swallow.

 

[Flinty]

Granted. It now hurts every time you breathe.

I wish I had presents to put under the tree.

 

[Reedstorm17]

Granted. You have empty but wrapped boxes to put under the tree.

I wish my parents would stop bugging me about my schoolwork and trust that I can get it done.

 

[Butterfly88]

Granted, but you accidentally forget it without their reminders.

I wish I could get a second dog.

 

[Flinty]

Granted. Say hello to Cujo.

I wish I could go back to 1994.

 

[Butterfly88]

Granted, but you get stuck there.

I wish I found the middle school I loved earlier.