Corrupt A Wish

[Reedstorm17]

Granted. Your clothes are wet.

I wish I could get my wisdom teeth out now instead of in six months.

 

[OrSomething]

Granted, but the dentist accidentally pulls out all your other teeth too.

I wish I was a good singer.

 

[Reedstorm17]

Granted. No one knows it.

I wish I could breathe underwater (my nine-year-old cousin's wish)

 

[Flinty]

Granted, but by doing so you suck the necessary oxygen away from the rest of the fish, so they die, so, ultimately, goodbye to life on Earth.

I wish I could get around to writing that report.

 

[Reedstorm17]

Granted. But then you want it to be perfect, so you spend the rest of the working on it and editing it way too much and never get around to anything else.

I wish Winter Break was more than eleven days (and don't you DARE say it's twelve now).

 

[OrSomething]

Granted. Winter break lasts an indefinite amount of time, and you spend that time inertly surfing the Web and watching TV and soon die from lack of movement.

I wish I had a cat.

 

[Reedstorm17]

Granted. You have a new pet tiger. It is extremely vicious.

I wish I could daydream about my book without getting interrupted every two seconds.

 

[tree]

WISH GRANTED:

The memory of your book has been deleted from your mind, permanently.

I wish the world would explode.

 

[Goatscoat]

Granted, your wish has been perfectly executed and the world exploded. Except that it didn't because it was all a lie and you are still alive and so is everyone you hate and love.

I wish I could create snow with the psychic powers of my mind.

 

[Reedstorm17]

(The Aspie memory cannot be deleted!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!)

Granted. You lose control of it and bury everyone alive.

I wish I could freeze and skip time.

 

[Butterfly88]

Granted, but you get stuck in time.

I wish it was Christmas every month.

 

[Frixion168]

Granted: Christmas is every month, but due to gift giving you are forced to claim bankruptcy.

I wish this holiday would end so I can finally get some moments alone to recharge mentally.

 

[Reedstorm17]

Granted. All holidays have ended. Forever. They are cancelled every year.

I wish it was easier to write Thank-you Notes and my dad didn't make me feel stupid every time I can't write one.

 

[Butterfly88]

Granted, but you are stuck writing all the Christmas cards next year.

I wish I didn't have depression.

 

[Reedstorm17]

Granted. You're so happy all the time and everyone avoids you.

I wish I won the board game my family played at dinner.

 

[Flinty]

Granted. Why you care so much about winning a game of Candy Land, we'll never know.

I wish the water in this building was functioning properly.

 

[Reedstorm17]

Granted. It's functioning TOO properly. Now you only get as much water as necessary at a particular time, which no one in the building used to using.

I wish there were more Comics in the paper.

 

[Flinty]

Granted, because the newspaper realizes that this is an opportunity to fire the rest of reporters (both of them).

I wish I had a good use for my Air Miles.

 

[Butterfly88]

Granted, but you get stuck at your destination.

I wish I didn't have vision problems.

 

[Reedstorm17]

Granted, but everyone else does and glasses do not exist anymore.

I wish my mom wouldn't accuse me of being on my phone for hours every time I pick it up for one minute.