Corrupt A Wish

[Joel's Hear]

Oklahoma... Ouch.

Granted, your wish.

The pumpkin talks but is really angry, has legs, and chases you around trying to eat you!

 

[Butterfly88]

I wish my dog would clean up after herself.

 

[Reedstorm17]

Granted. It cleans up after you, too. Including the things you'd rather leave as they are.

I wish I could just be me without hurting people.

 

[Joel's Hear]

Granted.

You find yourself happy, content, and fulfilled, realizing your inner essence and making all others around you at peace. Unfortunately, you trip and fall down a flight a stairs hurting no one but breaking both your arms.

I wish I could turn into a giant, flying, rhinoceros beetle.

 

[Reedstorm17]

Granted. Only you can't change back. It's not as fun as you thought it would be, is it?

I wish I didn't have an allergic reaction every time I get sunscreen in my eye.

 

[Lellynelly]

your wish is granted but unfortunately you now get an allergic reaction every time you touch the cream with your hands, that is so bad you have to have your fingers amputated.

I wish my tummy didn't hurt

 

[Reedstorm17]

Granted. We have cut out your tummy. At least it won't hurt now.

I wish creative writing camp would continue past 3.

 

[Fridgemagnetman]

Granted but it now lasts for eternity and you have to do it without sleep forever.

I wish I had a loaf of bread so I wouldn't have to go get one tomorrow.

 

[Reedstorm17]

Granted. It's moldy.

I wish I didn't get sunburn this afternoon.

 

[Fridgemagnetman]

Granted,
But you have a black eye after you were hit with a loaf of frozen moldy bread.

I wish I didn't write that

 

[tree]

Wish Granted.

You didn't write that remark about the eye and the moldy bread.
It appeared because your computer has been hacked and you are
subject to Remote Assistance Control and will be for the next
two weeks.

I wish I had more vertical storage.

 

[Reedstorm17]

Granted. Your storage space is now three times as tall as it was before, but only a centimeter wide and deep.

I wish I didn't get so bored during summer.

 

[Butterfly88]

Granted, but its now summer all year and everyday is sweltering hot.

I wish my in person aspie group met more often.

 

[Joel's Hear]

Granted. You all meet three times a day and at first you enjoy it, but the other members of the group gradually stop being Aspies and turn into the most machine-like NTs, while insisting they're still Aspies. They form into a clique, excluding you, and eventually you quit and are so disheartened you never join another group.

I wish my dishes washed themselves.

 

[Butterfly88]

Granted, but the sewer rats begin to help out so now although your dishes look clean they are not sanitary.

I wish the mayor of my town could be the mayor forever.

 

[Soona45]

Granted, but the sewer rats begin to help out so now although your dishes look clean they are not sanitary.

I wish the mayor of my town could be the mayor forever.

Granted the mayor of your town is the mayor forever, but he is a zombie and destroys the town because he's eating everyone's brain.


I wish I could go camping every weekend.

 

[Katleya]

Granted, but you may only camp in overcrowded music festivals, and your tent will always be right next to the Port-a-Potty area.

I wish I could eat eggs without gagging.

 

[Reedstorm17]

Granted. You never specified which type of eggs. How about human eggs?

I wish I could stop working at the zoo now instead of in August.

 

[Fridgemagnetman]

Granted. The day after you leave a lion escapes and, while you manage to fight off the lion wounding it severely, you trip over your own feet and fall off the sidewalk under the wheels of a school bus which flattens you.

I wish i didnt have to worry so much

 

[Katleya]

Granted. Now, you're making a conscious choice to worry, every Monday between 8:52 a.m. and 09:03, and can't find a way to sleep through those 11 minutes.

I wish people wouldn't go nuts when I say I don't find babies cute or interesting.