Corrupt A Wish

[Yeshuasdaughter]

Granted, but you are only an inch taller, so most people don't notice. It helps your self esteem, however, to know you are a wee bit taller.

I wish I were swimming in a warm ocean.

 

[blue_bird]

Granted, you're now floating in warm waters off a beautiful island but watch out for those man-eating, hungry sharks circling you.

I wish I could fly a helicopter.

 

[Yeshuasdaughter]

Granted, but it just goes up and down, not side to side. So you get the fun of flight way up in the sky, but you don't actually fly anywhere.

I wish I was exploring a cave.

 

[Captain Jigglypuff]

Granted. Unfortunately you get stuck inside a cavern with a bear....

I wish I had money to buy all the things that I want right now....

 

[Yeshuasdaughter]

Granted, but you find that buying things only for yourself to never be fulfilling, so you dedicate your savings to an orphanage in Africa.

I wish I could fall asleep here and wake up wherever I wanted.

 

[Captain Jigglypuff]

Granted! You now have narcolepsy!

I wish I had a pet squirrel!

 

[Yeshuasdaughter]

Granted, but he's always running around on the shelves and storing things in little cracks.

I wish I could go swimming right now

 

[Skittlebisquit]

Granted, but you are swimming in a large vat of chocolate milk. I wish I could figure out my timber farming notches so I could cut some parts

 

[Yeshuasdaughter]

Granted, but to your frustration, now every time you barely even nick the wood, you are so adept that it instantly is carved into a Greco-Roman statue.

I wish I could walk through walls.

 

[Captain Jigglypuff]

Granted. Unfortunately the very first wall you walk through leads to your grandma’s bathroom and she’s currently taking a shower....

I wish I had some candy!

 

[Yeshuasdaughter]

Granted. Unfortunately the very first wall you walk through leads to your grandma’s bathroom and she’s currently taking a shower...

(I don't care! What a wonderful gift! I want my Grandma!!!!!!! I'll cry profusely and go run and grab her bathrobe. Oh to smell her perfume again and watch her do her hair. I want to get red lipstick kisses, and to see her in her floral tops and 70s polyester pants. I want to hear the dishes clink, and see her in her floppy sunhat, watering her rose garden. I even want to hear her come home from the casino late at night, arguing with Grandpa! Oh I want my Grandmother!)

Your wish is granted, but so many trick or treaters come to the door, that you end up giving it all away in one night.

I wish there were rainbows every day.

 

[Skittlebisquit]

Granted, you are teleported to the GLADD regional headquarters, there are rainbows everywhere. I wish my cat would learn to read and do crochet

 

[Captain Jigglypuff]

Granted. Your cat now has the knowledge of how to crochet a rope and ties you up while he/she uses your laptop to drain your entire bank account to buy hundreds of thousands cans of tuna off of Amazon!

I wish it was November 19!

 

[Yeshuasdaughter]

Um... okay, it can be November 19th, just for you, but the next day, it has to be November 20th.

I wish I was eating breakfast.

 

[Captain Jigglypuff]

Granted. It’s all burnt and moldy because it’s the same breakfast you had exactly one month ago!

I wish I could fly!

Um... okay, it can be November 19th, just for you, but the next day, it has to be November 20th.

Don’t care what day is the next at that point. I got exactly what I wanted!

 

[Yeshuasdaughter]

Granted, you have the power of flight, but it's the kind of strange flight that happens in dreams. You flap your arms very fast, and then fly one inch off the ground wherever you want to go.

I wish I owned a home and a car.

 

[Skittlebisquit]

Granted, but the home is right next door to a maniacal despot evil super genius, with goals of global domination, and the car is a partially restored dodge colt with lime green metallic paint and mag wheels

 

[Slim Jim]

If I was a genie:

Spoiler

I wish I owned a home and a car.

The home is Amytville horror house. The car is Christine from Stephen King.

I wish I could fly!

I turn you into a bumblebee.

I wish it was November 19!

You wake up, everyday and it's November 19. A endless loop in the time-wave continuum. Ya know like that movie "groundhog day."

I wish I was eating breakfast.

Your are in a airplane crash, and for your survival, your breakfast consist of the passengers that didn't survive. Ya know like that movie; "Alive."

I wish I had some candy!

You are given a tasty box of new candy from local manufacturer, as a free sample. You eat it all. Later, there is a news report saying , the candy factory has been closed down because of nuclear radiation on the premises. All your teeth fall out and you lose all you hair.

I wish I had a pet squirrel!

I give you a very cute squirrel, that is adorable. But has rare disease. Bites you, and you have to have series of painful spinal tap injections.



My wish:

I wish I was a handsome prince who lived in a French mansion with a beautiful princess and we fall madly in love.

Now try to Corrupt that !!

 

[Captain Jigglypuff]

Granted. You are a French Prince during the French Revolution!

I wish that Lego sets weren’t so expensive.

 

[Slim Jim]

Ouch.

Granted. Lego prices drop. But only because a scientific investigation finds that the plastics used contain extremely toxic chemicals that cause birth defects and impotence.

I wish I had a....had a...uh... Ferarri F40. It must be red now!