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Corrupt A Wish

Granted- your legs are now twice as long and you are unable to fit on any of your furniture.

I wish my lunch break was longer.
 
Granted..... Ooops, I forgot to tell your boss so he fires you. Sorry about that. But looking on the bright side, now you can have as long as you want :-)

I wish I had a steady livable income without working.
 
Granted. But then the tax man knocks on your door demanding the money back for him accidently sending refunds meant for the whole country to your account.

I wish I didn't ever feel the need to sleep.
 
Granted. But you still get tired, and your brain starts manufacturing psychotic dreams, inspiring a new genre of horror movie, and you spend the rest of your life in a conference room answering questions from script writers.

I wish I had perfect pitch.
 
Granted. Unfortunately, you can neither hit nor catch a ball, and get rejected by the local baseball/softball team. So much for making a career of pitching (or singing :-P)

I wish I knew the true cause of Aspergers.
 
Granted. But then a "cure" is discovered, & you take the "cure" & become "cured". Then you forget who you are, & you can no longer come up with clever, fabulously funny & outrageous replies for the Corrupt A Wish (PG Version) Game so you feel inferior & no longer play. That makes you so sad that you cry yourself a river, float away, nearly drown & land on a deserted island. You are lonely & hungry, & wish you could back in time to when you could play the Corrupt A Wish (PG Version) Game & LOL with a full belly.

But still, I wish we knew the true cause of Autism because I love science & am curious.
 
Granted, but now there are another fifty potential disorders "underneath" and none of the research got funded.

I wish I could write a book.
 
Granted, but now there are another fifty potential disorders "underneath" and none of the research got funded.

I wish I could write a book.
Granted. You get sixty-four rejection letters, finally get published, it becomes a runaway bestseller, and you find that you are extremely uncomfortable doing interviews and book signings so you turn into a JD Salinger-esque recluse for the rest of your life.

I wish I could go back to performing without the horrid stage fright that finally drove me away from it.
 
Granted but that "horrid stage fright" is your leading lady who thinks you are wonderful and starts stalking you and asking you for dates.

I wish my annoying cough would ease up
 
Granted but that "horrid stage fright" is your leading lady who thinks you are wonderful and starts stalking you and asking you for dates.

I wish my annoying cough would ease up

Granted. You no longer cough and you've received three invitations to try out for opera, because your diaphragm exhibits the extraordinary flexion of a professional bellows.

I wish I could remodel the bathroom without having to do it myself.
 
Granted: The big yellow bulldozer also remodelled your kitchen, lounge and bedroom while it was at it. The plans for the new bypass have been available ages, so you should have known. But I wouldn't worry about it as the Vogons just arrived.

I wish I was back home again.
 
Granted. You're Back Home Again In Indiana. Jim Nabors is following you around crooning that song.

I wish for a good night's sleep.
 
Granted. You wake up refreshed realizing that you slept through everyone else getting off the planet by hitchhiking a lift with the Dentrassi via your Sub Ether Signalling device.

I wish I had a nice cup of tea and some biccies
 
Granted! You are given a nice cup of tea and biccies to help you cope with the news that superheroes are real, and you birth parents are superman and wonderwoman and any day now your super hero powers will begin to manifest.

I wish I could eat as many sweets as I wanted and never put on any weight [emoji3]
 
Granted, you now pig out on sweets and despite not putting on weight, your teeth get horriedly decayed and you now have to go to the dentist to have them all extracted !

I wish I was so much better at Mathematics !
 
Granted, but you get so good at maths that MI5 kidnap you and lock you in a room a force you to solve all number related crime. The don't let you get a hair cut either, so you end up looking like cousin IT from the Addams Family.


I wish I could change the colour of my hair just by thinking of the colour I wanted it to be.
 
Granted ! You can now change your hair colour at a whim but now you are being stalked by an amourous chameleon who is declaring his undying passion for you.

Watch out for the tongue when it kisses you. :p:D

I wish I owned my own house.
 
Watch out for the tongue when it kisses you. :p:D

Ewwww! lol

Granted! Unfortunatley it is a wooden house that you share with a couple of termites and their 2billion offspring. So, it's more a pile of sawdust than a house. :p


I wish I could fly like a bird.
 
Granted. Your skydiving parachute failed to open and now you are doing a splendid imitation of a seabird diving for fish. Pity the sea is so far away, or we might have mackerel for dinner.

I wish I could sleep in longer today...
 

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