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Would I be better or more miserable if I admit I will accept I will never have a girlfriend?

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I already got out of my comfort zone over 4 1/2 years ago and I did much more to get out of it this past year but it still was not enough for the people here on these forums telling me it's not enough. I still only encounter woman in relationships and I am sick of it. My mother says there is nothing I can do about it and I am starting to believe her.
 
Tony Ramirez said:
I already got out of my comfort zone over 4 1/2 years ago and I did much more to get out of it this past year but it still was not enough for the people here on these forums telling me it's not enough. I still only encounter woman in relationships and I am sick of it. My mother says there is nothing I can do about it and I am starting to believe her.
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Do you have any siblings or are you an only child? If you do have siblings, how have they done in regards to dating
 
Tony Ramirez said:
I did much more to get out of it this past year but it still was not enough for the people here on these forums telling me it's not enough.
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If you say you're not achieving your objective, you can't reasonably object to getting additional suggestions.

Tony Ramirez said:
I still only encounter woman in relationships and I am sick of it.
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This is an example of things you need to change that I'd classify into the "what not to do" category.
Women often use "I'm in an LTR" as a gentle indirect refusal to an approach. But as long as they are polite in refusal, you owe them the same thing. And they don't owe you anything other than politeness.

1. You can't hide resentment. People who see it are much less likely to want a social relationship with you.
2. Displaying resentment after a refusal is the worst possible time. It's remembered.

This isn't the whole story by any means, but what you need to achieve is clear. Lose the resentment. Forever.

* I don't doubt you've been told this before, but you still report feeling it.
* I know it's hard to make such a change - perhaps you'll need help.
* This probably isn't the only thing you need to stop doing. But I can only go by what you say here

My point is simple though: this is definitely affecting your dating prospects.

And just for absolute clarity: this is something that can't be there. It's not "fix this and you'll get a GF" advice. Because there's no such thing.
 
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So you are saying basically whenever I go to a social event or a group where their are women just being there I put out a vibe that just attracts woman in relationships to talk to me and to feel sorry for me. Thanks. Now I feel even more hopeless. Really. I walk into a place and smile. What else am I doing wrong?

I also use to keep an anxiety scale and journal. I use to log 9 as if a single woman came up to me for a conversation and 10 if I went up to her. I also logged 5 couple and 5M as married. 5BF if she had a boyfriend. I stopped doing it when I found out later many of my 9s and 10s ended up being 5BF and 5M. Then I stopped journeling.
 
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Tony Ramirez said:
So you are saying basically whenever I go to a social event or a group where their are women just being there I put out a vibe that just attracts woman in relationships to talk to me and to feel sorry for me. Thanks. Now I feel even more hopeless. Really. I walk into a place and smile. What else am I doing wrong?
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Consider randomizing social events so groups of women aren't so inclined to collectively hear (by word of mouth) that you're looking for a girlfriend. If "word gets out" to a group, it's likely to spoil your intentions. Especially if you attend the same social venues repeatedly. When this may be the result. Where they not only sense your vibe, but they already know you are going to approach them and to no avail on their part.

Tough for us introverts to do, but I suspect it's the only way to mitigate how transparent or desperate you may actually appear to them.

Along similar lines, seriously consider re-evaluating how you think you appear or come across to women, versus the possibility that you may be wrong in whole or in part. You may eventually find there's a shortcoming you didn't see or want to admit to.
 
I don't see anybody saying that you @Tony Ramirez are putting out a
vibe that attracts women in relationships and that they talk to you because
they feel sorry for you.

What I do see is that you don't seem to enjoy people in general.

What would be wrong in getting to know some humans who aren't
destined to be your mate?
 
tree said:
I don't see anybody saying that you @Tony Ramirez are putting out a
vibe that attracts women in relationships and that they talk to you because
they feel sorry for you.

What I do see is that you don't seem to enjoy people in general.

What would be wrong in getting to know some humans who aren't
destined to be your mate?
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Might be worthwhile just to look up symptoms or manifestations of misanthropy. Whether it really applies or not. Definitely not the sort of thing you want to inadvertently project to a potential romantic partner. Especially at first contact. Never a good idea to underestimate one's intuition or instincts.

I know, more stuff we can't necessarily see and have such difficulty in processing. But it's true.
 
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Judge said:
Consider randomizing social events so groups of women aren't so inclined to collectively hear (by word of mouth) that you're looking for a girlfriend. If "word gets out" to a group, it's likely to spoil your intentions. Especially if you attend the same social venues repeatedly. When this may be the result. Where they not only sense your vibe, but they already know you are going to approach them and to no avail on their part.

Tough for us introverts to do, but I suspect it's the only way to mitigate how transparent or desperate you may actually appear to them.

Along similar lines, seriously consider re-evaluating how you think you appear or come across to women, versus the possibility that you may be wrong in whole or in part. You may eventually find there's a shortcoming you didn't see or want to admit to.
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I been talking to more people than potential single women. Really I been trying. But it has not made a difference. I still only seem to have women in relationships eventually talk to me. I grow tired if this. No, at all the local park events I been too I never told anyone I am looking for a relationship unlike the church leaders/people there and my yoga teachers.
 
Tony Ramirez said:
She can't even be left by herself so yes. She can never date or have friends unlike me who has the capacity to do.
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She can't be left by herself because?

Can she feed herself?
Bathe self?
Potty on her own?

She can speak so that she can
indicate her wishes.
 
Tony Ramirez said:
Yes, yes, yes.
But no, she can't date or anything like that.
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Are you able to talk to her about your thoughts and feelings? Do you have a good relationship with her? Also, is she your younger or older sister? Just curious. I hadn't heard you mention her before.
 
Rodafina said:
Are you able to talk to her about your thoughts and feelings? Do you have a good relationship with her? Also, is she your younger or older sister? Just curious. I hadn't heard you mention her before.
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It's hard to talk to her. She thinks like a child and repeats herself. Ask's basic questions and does not understand many normal questions. I am actually quite lucky when it comes to my ability to socialize, complete high school and do things outside.

My sister has Kanner's syndrome.
https://www.medicinenet.com/what_are_the_5_different_types_of_autism/article.htm
 
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