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a new client arrived
he just want to have some treat
I'm obviously a giant child who loves to relive the 90s and early 2000s lol... I just bought a pack of 50 butterfly clips and a bunch of hair scrunchies and I love them. They are so cute. I didn't used to do much with my hair, it was very short for years and for the past year or so I've just braided it or put it in a ponytail. But I got my hair done earlier and it's motivating me to do cute stuff with my hair!I do almost always try to wake up by 5am (whether I've slept for 8 hours or not) since I give the dogs breakfast at 5:30 and take them out at 7, because my work day usually starts at 8. But last night I was on and off since midnight so only got about 4 hours of sleep in total. Nevertheless, I am going to try to make it a good day. I have to work until 1pm and then I'm going to do some agility training with Enzo.I suddenly have excruciating pain behind my left kneecap. I did make a doctor's appointment that's coming up in a few days but I don't know if they'll just dismiss me again. Sometimes I'm scared that something is really wrong with me and I'm just going to drop dead one day and no one will know why.
The problem with my breasts resolved itself though and I didn't end up needing antibiotics. That's good.I've been feeling pretty bad about myself because of all my medical issues, so I'm getting my hair done on Monday, and having my friend who is a makeup artist give me a makeover. I also did some Black Friday shopping. I don't think I do enough to take care of my appearance and I need a confidence boost.I made an appointment to talk to a specialist next week. I'm so uncomfortable. I feel like I'm pregnant but I know I'm not because it's impossible. I even look like I'm pregnant and other people have commented on this. I think I may be going through a false pregnancy but I don't know if that's a result of menopause, hormone imbalance, or emotional trauma/anxiety. Either way I seriously need to talk to a doctor...More TMI... The breast pain has gotten really bad and it's mostly in one breast, and after doing some googling it sounds like it may be periductal mastitis (sometimes occurring in menopausal women who are taking estrogen.) Going to take a hot shower, use a heating pad, and try to rest. If it doesn't get better in the morning I might need to go to urgent care and get some antibiotics (if that's actually what it is.)I know PTSD causes memory lapses, which I definitely have, but can it cause memory *loss* too? My short term memory is really bad nowadays. I’m currently struggling to remember something I read a few hours ago. I forget some people’s names. I don’t know if this could be from PTSD or from too much medication, or if it’s something I should be worried about like an early sign of dementia.About asking someone to do something and they never do it... My mother does this exact thing constantly and it's infuriating. She likes to get things done "eventually," which basically means they NEVER get done, and I like to get things done ASAP. I'm a very hard worker and she is the opposite. When I still lived with her I did everything. I only see her a few times a week but she still manages to drive me bonkers.I might not be able to move into the new house until March or April. My lease here expires in April and they told me today that if I move out in December, I owe them $12,000. That is NOT happening, that's freaking ridiculous. So now I have to wait. I want to scream. My maturity level is admittedly not where it should be at nearing 30 years old and I'm obviously clueless about this stuff so of course this would happenI have occasional moments where I feel really calm, and it gives me false hope that my body is warding off another anxiety attack. Right now I'm nauseous and have blurred peripheral vision again. But I'm sure it will go away for a while, and then come back. Ironically I've been sleeping better lately but it's because my body is running me into the ground all day. -
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