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I attended a speed dating event today

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FeatherBird said:
I don't know off the top of my head how common arranged marriages were in the 1950s. I believe they were more common in the 1800s (in western society). I would imagine arranged marriages don't require the man to approach the woman (I'm pretty sure the parents arranged the marriages)

Even in the pre-1960 20th century, however, there was the social stigma against having multiple partners. So even if a man had to approach a woman to get a relationship, he'd at least be far less likely (compared to 2024) to get "nexted" the first time he did something that rubbed her the wrong way.

One problem I run into is getting "nexted" in the instances where I initially secure a woman's interest.
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yeah, because lots of people agree, that cold approaching in public places, for example, the mall, grocery store, coffee shop, or places like that, is unnatural because if a guy comes up to a woman like that in a public place, the women are naturally going to have their guard up, be wary of the guy, i think approaching is more meant to be in social circle or mutual friends, because when you meet people that way, people are more trusting of one another, they figure "he/she knows or he/she knows or is acquainted with that person" that means that person is less threatening, easier to trust.

Yeah, i don't even know if there is any evidence of men approaching women in prehistoric times.

Yeah, even before i read any of the posts on this forum, i knew i was going to hear of sad situations, cases, like Tony for example, it just comes with the Territory.
 
Steelbookcollector217 said:
yeah, because lots of people agree, that cold approaching in public places, for example, the mall, grocery store, coffee shop, or places like that, is unnatural because if a guy comes up to a woman like that in a public place, the women are naturally going to have their guard up, be wary of the guy, i think approaching is more meant to be in social circle or mutual friends, because when you meet people that way, people are more trusting of one another, they figure "he/she knows or he/she knows or is acquainted with that person" that means that person is less threatening, easier to trust.

Yeah, i don't even know if there is any evidence of men approaching women in prehistoric times.

Yeah, even before i read any of the posts on this forum, i knew i was going to hear of sad situations, cases, like Tony for example, it just comes with the Territory.
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Yes social proofing is a big deal. Being a loner comes with all sorts of stigma.
 
I never had a girlfriend or even a simple female platonic friend to ever hang with. I tried everything but ultimately failed. I been shamed like it's my fault all the time. I had multiple meltdowns and even ended up in the hospital twice. I am in the verge of a breakdown. Only married women with their husbands and men befriend me, hang with me.
 
Tony Ramirez said:
I never had a girlfriend or even a simple female platonic friend to ever hang with. I tried everything but ultimately failed. I been shamed like it's my fault all the time. I had multiple meltdowns and even ended up in the hospital twice. I am in the verge of a breakdown. Only married women with their husbands and men befriend me, hang with me.
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yeah, thinking about cases like Tony just fills me with anger and rage, depression, its another reminder on how i like to have the mindset that, women are the only gender that are owed a relationship, yet people will always argue and say that no one is owed anything, regarding both genders, well it feels like women are the only gender since women are less at risk than men are at being forever alone like Tony is.
 
Women mostly single automatically see me as a creep and predator as soon as they look at me by judgment. Even though I try to act polite and say thank you and excuse me. The rage, profanity and self harm comes when I am by myself or when no one is around. The public shaming of couples and platonic's comes from that rage building up because of the ostracized and judgement stereotype of those single women.
 
I think I recall it being said earlier in this thread (I forget who said it) that, in addition to possibly getting a criminal record, a man also runs the risk of getting brutalized or even murdered if he unknowingly acts "creepy" when pursuing a woman.

On a different forum I belong to, I read a post this morning where some guy said he's witnessed other guys at college parties get gang-brutalized by several male attendees.

As for why: Because the victim of the beatdown made a move on the "wrong" girl and/or acted "creepy" when pursuing a girl at the party. She then informed some of the male attendees, who then proceeded to carry out a beatdown.
 
Pathetic how men with ASD are treated by women. Many don't even stand a chance. I don't know why I even bother to socialize. I am getting mentally and physically sicker by the day. It's doing physical harm to my body and no amount of exercise will help as it hasn't. I tried it made it worse since women are there.
 
FeatherBird said:
I think I recall it being said earlier in this thread (I forget who said it) that, in addition to possibly getting a criminal record, a man also runs the risk of getting brutalized or even murdered if he unknowingly acts "creepy" when pursuing a woman.

On a different forum I belong to, I read a post this morning where some guy said he's witnessed other guys at college parties get gang-brutalized by several male attendees.

As for why: Because the victim of the beatdown made a move on the "wrong" girl and/or acted "creepy" when pursuing a girl at the party. She then informed some of the male attendees, who then proceeded to carry out a beatdown.
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It's a chance for them to raise their status a bit, with no serious risk to their well being. In other words, contemptible, manipulated cowards.
 
Tony Ramirez said:
Pathetic how men with ASD are treated by women. Many don't even stand a chance. I don't know why I even bother to socialize. I am getting mentally and physically sicker by the day. It's doing physical harm to my body and no amount of exercise will help as it hasn't. I tried it made it worse since women are there.
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What's really pathetic is the fact that, in some cases, even a woman with ASD will treat us poorly.
 
Tony Ramirez said:
Pathetic how men with ASD are treated by women. Many don't even stand a chance. I don't know why I even bother to socialize. I am getting mentally and physically sicker by the day. It's doing physical harm to my body and no amount of exercise will help as it hasn't. I tried it made it worse since women are there.
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and i'm sure for all time, the rate of women with autism getting into a relationship has always been much higher than the rate of men with autism of getting into a relationship
 
Steelbookcollector217 said:
and i'm sure for all time, the rate of women with autism getting into a relationship has always been much higher than the rate of men with autism of getting into a relationship
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Yeah. Because the characteristics that come with ASD are a turn off to the typical woman. Yet the characteristics that come with ASD aren't a turn off to the typical man.

There was a reality show called Love On The Spectrum. As the title suggests, everyone on the show (both male and female) had ASD. Even some of the female contestants on that show berated the men for having ASD mannerisms.

Goes to show: In some cases, even a woman who has ASD is turned off by ASD in a man.
 
I do feel now that I am finally in the right church, the one I found during the summer, the third one after being hurt by three, the worst, the most recent. This one does accept my autism as they proved it many times. However, even though all but one woman ostracized me which is leaving I do feel more accepted, and they are teaching me social skills. They were also the only church that got me through a suicide attempt no thanks to the recent dump church that took 5 weeks before they noticed me after complaints to the pastor then a major issue that caused depression.
 
FeatherBird said:
Yeah. Because the characteristics that come with ASD are a turn off to the typical woman. Yet the characteristics that come with ASD aren't a turn off to the typical man.

There was a reality show called Love On The Spectrum. As the title suggests, everyone on the show (both male and female) had ASD. Even some of the female contestants on that show berated the men for having ASD mannerisms.

Goes to show: In some cases, even a woman who has ASD is turned off by ASD in a man.
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and this is the pattern of that series, majority of the men on that series have little to no dating/relationship experience, either have never had a girlfriend before or something very short-term, a few dates only, however, most of the women on that series, have had at least one boyfriend before, and yes outside of this forum, i've heard of sadly other men, 30s and older, middle-aged men too, who have never dated, never been in a relationship before.

The most cruel fact about this, is that, many of these guys are normal looking guys, no birth defects or any deformities
 
Steelbookcollector217 said:
and this is the pattern of that series, majority of the men on that series have little to no dating/relationship experience, either have never had a girlfriend before or something very short-term, a few dates only, however, most of the women on that series, have had at least one boyfriend before, and yes outside of this forum, i've heard of sadly other men, 30s and older, middle-aged men too, who have never dated, never been in a relationship before.

The most cruel fact about this, is that, many of these guys are normal looking guys, no birth defects or any deformities
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Yeah. I have good looks. Yet other than an 8 month relationship in my early 20s with a girlfriend well below me on the looks scale (and who couldn't even fully speak English), all of my successes with the ladies have been short-lived.
 
My standard for women's looks are not even that high but even those women won't give me the time of day and I see many of them with Chad's.
 
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